


Haseya

by KCeeRae



Series: Haseya [1]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Explicit Language, Fist Fights, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, McHanzo Big Bang, Post-Recall, Reunions, Slow Burn, Trans Jesse McCree, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-14 14:15:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 51,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18477916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KCeeRae/pseuds/KCeeRae
Summary: The Recall offered Jesse a kind of peace he hadn't felt since before leaving Blackwatch all those years ago. A roof over his head, a real bed to sleep in, food, friends - everything a cowboy could ever ask for. Of course the peace wouldn't last. When Genji introduces his brother as a new member of Overwatch, McCree is forced to balance the close relationship he has with Genji to the hatred he has toward his brother. While navigating the tension and violence that rises up with Hanzo, the man also makes Jesse confront the actions of his past and the feelings of guilt and self-loathing he's been carrying with him most of his life. The man who he hated most in the world becomes a confidant and a guide as McCree travels back to places he swore he would never see again, begins to move on, and find those who he believed to be lost.For the McHanzo Big Bang 18-19





	Haseya

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you McHanzo Big Bang! I have been enviously watching people participate in these events for YEARS and finally decided to dive in and try it out (of course I bit off a little more than I could chew by being an artist and a writer. Check out [Dusk till Dawn](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18444086/chapters/43693319) by [Luciolelights](https://twitter.com/luciolelights?lang=en) and [my](https://kceerae.tumblr.com/post/184163000866/i-have-had-an-amazing-experience-the-last-few) and [Mel's](https://twitter.com/brownfrogs/status/1117241274669641730) pieces!)
> 
> Now to gush about my artist [BBee-Can](https://twitter.com/s0lkatt) for about twelve paragraphs so please skip this if you aren't interested (but you should be). Here is their [ART](https://twitter.com/S0lkatt/status/1117887370160771072) that I just can't stop staring at. I was nervous *spoilers* about writing a fic with an original character that featured so heavily in the narrative, especially when there would be someone drawing her (most like likely) and I hadn't even designed her yet. However he ran with it and created her more authentically than I would have ever been able to. He gave me amazing input, inspired me with ideas and doodles, and I don't think 'Haseya' would have happened without him. Thank you!
> 
> Now to the nitty gritty of Trigger Warnings/Tags!  
> *this section contains spoilers*
> 
> Trans!McCree: Jesse is Trans FTM. This isn't explicitly stated but is alluded two twice in reference to his scars and top surgery. Once when he and Hanzo are discussing their scars Jesse says very fondly that he 'got them in Blackwatch'. The other is during the scene with Reyes where Gabriel is trying to let Jesse know he can talk to him and mentions ' I helped you get your surgery I support you', or something to that effect. I recently came out as Transmasc and I am waiting impatiently for a top surgery date. Writing Jesse in this way is extremely therapeutic for me. 
> 
> Violence: Hanzo and McCree get into two fist fights toward the beginning of the fic. Later Jesse recognizes that wasn't healthy and they both apologize. 
> 
> Implied/Reference Suicide: If you asked Jesse he would say he doesn't want to kill himself. Jesse ends up in the hospital after trying to remove the Deadlock tattoo from his skin because of the feelings associated with it. The act isn't described in detail but it's implied he tried to cut the ink out. He's bandaged in the scene and there's a mention of blood. There is also a moment during the scene where Jesse has been drinking alone in his room he thinks something along the lines of ' you'll just try to kill yourself again ' despite that never having been his intention. 
> 
> Implied/Referenced Child Abuse: This is a theme throughout the fic, if this topic triggers you I would read carefully. None if it is explicit and while 'child trafficking' is alluded to there is no direct mention of sexual abuse. On Jesse and Hanzo's stealth mission they rescue 72 children from child trafficking. In McCree's flashback he explains how Deadlock often kidnapped and abused children physically. Then during Haseya's flashback it is stated the foster parents often spank/beat the girls with a belt.
> 
> Explicit Language: I'll be the first to admit I have a potty mouth. I can control it around children and in professional settings but when I'm with friends Fuck is a large part of my vocabulary. As such, Jesse and others say "Fuckin'." On more than one occasion in this story.
> 
> That felt like a lot of preamble but at the end of this I just want to say THANK YOU for reading. Please go check out the accompanying art because this fic wouldn't be the same without it. I hope you enjoy! - KCeeRae

Approaching footsteps along the Watchpoint walkway pull McCree from his thoughts, and he tips his hat back slightly so he can look up at his visitor. “An’ to what do I owe the pleasure?” McCree asks, patting the spot next to him in invitation.

Genji sinks down to sit beside his friend, looking out over the waves as they roll up onto shore, “I have a request of you, if you are not too busy.”

McCree can’t help the little laugh that spills out of him, “Oh, ‘m real busy these days. Plan to smoke the rest of my cigarillos and stare out at the waves ‘til sunset. Can’t have that interrupted, no sir, no how.”

Genji, polite to a fault these days since coming back from Nepal, tips his head to the side, “If you would like your evening to yourself-”

Snorting, McCree slings his arm around Genji’s shoulders, pulling him in close, “‘m jokin’, Genji. Always ready to help a friend. What’cha need?”

Genji huffs, leaning into the embrace, “If I told you there was someone I’d like you to meet, what would your answer be?”

“Now, now. Gettin’ too old for anythin’ like that, tho’ I appreciate the offer-”

“Shut up, you are only thirty-eight.” Genji laughs, shoving McCree playfully and rising to his feet, “I assure you, this is most certainly not a romantic prospect. It is a new member of Overwatch and I would like to introduce you to them myself. If you would be amenable.”

Getting to his own feet, McCree stretches his arms over his head until he hears a crack, “New member? Ain’t heard nothin’ ‘bout that.” McCree withholds the fact he hasn’t read his email in about two weeks and could be missing all kinds of information at this point.

“When Overwatch requested I return I asked that two people be allowed invitation, along with myself.”

McCree raises one finger, “Zenyatta.” He raises a second and waits for Genji to spill the beans. He can practically see Genji smirking behind his mask.

“You will have to come see for yourself… if you are not too busy.”

“Aw, hell. Now you got me curious.” McCree waves a hand at Genji, “Go on, lead the way. Yeah, yeah, you should be real proud of yourself, temptin’ a poor old cowboy with ninja secrets.”

Laughing, Genji falls in step with McCree as they walk back inside, “If you are done making a fool of yourself _cowboy_ I must give a few words of warning before you meet my companion.”

“They’re another monk, ain’t they? Gonna keep spreadin’ the peace and transcendence until all’a Overwatch is meditating together like a big happy hippy commune. I see what’s happenin’, can’t fool me.”

“If peace can be achieved with this person I would be endlessly grateful, “ Genji removes his mask and smiles, bright and open, “ I have told you of my journey with the Shambali, and the peace I was able to find toward the events of my life?”

“You have. Shit, the mask’s off, this is gettin’ real serious.”

“Quiet, I am telling a story. Through my struggles the one thing I fought to come to terms with was the relationship I had with my brother. As you know I was extremely angry with my brother when we had first met, and I realized that the anger was misplaced. The circumstances of our youth and upbringing did not foster healthy relationships and communication, but through all that Hanzo put me first. All the while continuing to be brainwashed by the power of our family.”

They stop walking, taking a moment in the halls of the Watchpoint to speak.

“I can not imagine the struggle that he was put through, that he did not let me see, as he shielded me from the family. I only saw a glimpse of it as he forced himself to kill me. It was a task not easily accomplished... Did you know he left the Shimada after my death?”

McCree shakes his head and Genji smiles,

“I found out he returns to Shimada castle on the anniversary of my death, every year. He pays his respects for his brother that he killed. He believes he cannot atone for what he has done, he believes-”

Clenching his fists against his side, McCree growls, “He _killed_ ya, Genji. Course he can’t atone for that. No one deserves that second chance.”

Genji catches McCree’s gaze and reminds with force, “You know I have forgiven him. I am telling you that I have.”

“Don’t see how.” McCree grunts, holding Genji’s gaze. They’ve been through this before and McCree can’t help the feeling in his gut. Family killers should never be forgiven.

“My journey toward forgiveness does not need to be understood, but I hope it will be _accepted._ ” Genji states firmly.

“Hey, ‘m jus’ lookin’ out for you so that son of a bitch can’t hurt ya again. You gotta know why I’d be worried, Genji… people like that-” McCree grasps at Genji’s hand, “People like that don’t deserve it, don’t deserve what yer offerin’.”

“I am more than capable of making decisions for myself. Jesse-” Genji squeezes Jesse’s hand back in an attempt to reassure, “- I want you to not hold any animosity toward my brother for events already forgiven.”

That’s when it clicks for McCree, his mouth falling open and face contorting in anger, “It’s yer fuckin’ brother. You brought that piece of _shit-”_

 _“Jesse-”_ Genji warns.

“ _Why!?_ He killed ya, Genji! He don’t _deserve_ you, ya shouldn’t forgive him!” McCree insists, eyes going wild until Genji’s grip on his hand tightens dangerously and the cowboy whimpers. 

“Do not project your own self-loathing onto my journey of forgiveness.” Genji hisses, “I understand where you are coming from, Jesse. I understand the pain and the _hatred_ … but now is not the time for it. It is not the feelings I hold in my heart… you, above anyone else, can understand how Hanzo feels, even if you cannot understand how he is to be forgiven.”

McCree’s shoulders sag and he breathes in through his nose, “‘m sorry, Genji. Didn’ mean to pick a fight… I jus’ don’t understand it. Certainly don’t like it neither.”

Genji rubs McCree’s hand soothingly, apologetically, “I know you do not. All is forgiven, friend. You may understand, in due time.” Genji promises, looking over McCree’s shoulder down the hallway. His face lights up as someone approaches.

“Am I interrupting something?” A voice asks.

“Never, brother. Come meet my dear friend.”

McCree turns on his heel and watches as a man approaches them. He straightens himself to his full height, arms crossed over his chest.

Hanzo Shimada walks with complete confidence and surety. McCree has met many men in his life and it is simple to tell when one is a killer. He sees it in his own reflection every day. Gritting his teeth, he tries to hide his disgust.

“Hanzo, this is Jesse McCree. We were partners in Blackwatch. He is my very best friend, next to Zenyatta, of course.”

Hanzo bows his head slightly, eyes not leaving McCree’s, “Greetings. I am pleased to meet a friend of Genji’s.”

“I’ve heard plenty ‘bout you.” McCree says, watching Hanzo grit his teeth ever so slightly. McCree jumps when Genji elbows him and clears his throat, “Well, if yer anythin’ like Genji ‘m sure we’ll get on just fine. Welcome to Overwatch, an’ all that.” He coughs, pulling a cigarillo out of his pocket and sticking it between his lips.

“... Thank you.” Hanzo narrows his eyes and puts his gaze back on Genji. He seems to take in Genji’s uncovered face for a moment before speaking again, “Could you please show me to my room again? I am afraid I have yet to remember the way.”

“Certainly. Jesse-” Genji smiles softly, “- I will see you soon? Tomorrow?” 

“ Yeah, yeah, of course, Genji.” McCree murmurs, giving the two a tilt of his hat as he watches them walk away together. Fists clenched, McCree leaves in the other direction, a foul taste settling in his mouth.

_\----_

 

McCree barely sees Hanzo over the following weeks, but to be fair no one sees much of the man at all. If he isn’t talking - sometimes arguing - with Genji, or sneaking meals in solitude, he is hidden away in his room without much interest in anyone else. It was clear he was only there for Genji and would not have made an appearance otherwise.

At the moment Overwatch is not a well-oiled machine. There is no training schedule, missions, or expectations. They are considering themselves in the recruitment stage, so it comes as a shock to everyone when the alarms in the base go off and there are orders for everyone to suit up.

Winston had received word that Omnics were attacking the coast just across the sea in Morocco. He believed that it would be a simple mission that would allow the team to stretch their legs and he was right.

The omnics unleashed on the town, while many, were obsolete models that lent themselves to being wonderful target practice for the cooped up members of Overwatch. McCree was in his absolute glory, standing up on high ground and landing headshot after headshot on the approaching bots.

“Thirty-two! Thirty-three! Thirty- Hey! Genji! That was _mine_.”

Genji chuckles, pausing in front of McCree for a moment, “Be faster, then, and maybe you would have gotten it first.” he advises before zipping off again.

“Jackass.” McCree grunts. He’ll give Genji credit, the ninja was doing quite a job with his sword, chopping down the bots in large numbers. He isn’t the only Shimada doing one hell of a job.

McCree’s eyes drift up to one of the buildings where Hanzo was perched, releasing a volley of arrows on the bots below. McCree’s gotta admit, the man is a master of his weapon and he’s awful impressed. Not that he would admit it to anyone.

McCree stands by his gut feeling, even if he keeps that to himself. Genji should have never forgiven Hanzo and let him this close. It just doesn’t _sit right_.

A stream of bots pour into the street in front of them and McCree lifts his revolver, ready to show off with a pretty little Deadeye - show Hanzo just what he’s dealing with if he tries anything funny - until he hears the shout above him.

“ _Ryuu ga waga teki wo kurau!”_

The dragons spiral through the air and McCree is filled with the same fear and wonder as he had been the first time he’d seen Genji’s dragon, all those years ago. “ _Awesome.”_ He breathes, taking it in simply as a spectator- until he sees who is in the dragon’s path.

Genji is still chopping down bots with vigor, right in the path of the dragons. McCree doesn’t even think, he rolls off his perch and sprints to where Genji is fighting. The deafening roar is catching up with them and he only has a moment. He catches the cyborg by the shoulders and throws him out of the path of the beasts.

“McCree!”

“Jesse!?”

The roar of the beasts and sound of battle falls into silence as McCree is overcome by the dragons. He can feel them watching him, judging him, their power running through every inch of his body.

They could kill him if they wanted to.

As quickly as they had overcome him, they dissipate, curling into the air until McCree can no longer see them. He falls to his knees, looking up at the sky.

There’s hands on his shoulders and McCree’s gaze comes back to Earth, “Jesse! Look at me. You are okay. I know it is a shock, experiencing the typhoon of the dragons.” Genji soothes, fixing McCree’s hat on his head with gentle hands.

McCree swallows, searching for his voice. He finds it when Hanzo comes into view, face troubled.

“It was  not my intention to-” 

“ You- You were shootin’ those things right at Genji!”

The two brothers look perplexed before realization dawns on Genji’s face, “McCree. The Dragons will not kill another Shimada, I was very safe. You did not need to risk yourself… you jumped in thinking you would _die_ , Jessie.” Genji huffs and smacks the cowboy in the shoulder for being so selfless. Then rubs the spot where he hit with a hand, “What have I told you about taking bullets for me and acting reckless?!”  

“Well, I thought he was gonna-!” McCree holds his tongue and Hanzo grunts. 

“Say it. You believed I was going to kill him again. Like I would _ever_.” Hanzo spits, eyes like fire on McCree.

“Well how am I supposed to know that!?” McCree gets to his feet, unfortunately a little shaky after the embrace of the dragons. He leans against Genji’s right side for support, feeling the cyborg’s hand on his back.

“Then I will make it clear for you.” Hanzo snaps, getting into McCree’s space, forcing the man to take a step back.

“Brother-”

“No, let me say this, Genji. I have not been in Overwatch long, I have not spoken to many of you more than once, if at all. Perhaps I do not deserve to be given the benefit of the doubt, but know this-” Hanzo pokes his finger into McCree’s chest armour and the cowboy snarls.

“Get yer hand off’a me.” He warns, yet Hanzo stands his ground. 

“- Do you really think, after making a mistake so severe, I would _ever_ venture to do it again? How _dare_ you think that of me. I have faltered, yes, but I will not fall that far again. Would you repeat a mistake so grievous twice?”

McCree grabs Hanzo’s arm by the wrist and is certain he feels the dragons burning underneath Hanzo’s skin. He pushes the hand away from his chest and steps back, releasing Hanzo and moving away from Genji’s touch, “This ain’t about me! I don’t know what kinda man ya are but anyone who would kill their siblin’ is a real bad one.” Jesse grunts, voice dripping in thick layers of malice.

“Then cease making it about yourself. I am a man who is seeking redemption, I do not need validation from you. Even if you were spared by my dragons, even if they have deemed you a good man, you have not shown me as much.”

“I don’t care ‘bout the opinion of a couple’a _snakes.”_

If it wasn’t for Genji pulling on the back of Hanzo’s kyudo-gi the elder Shimada would have drove McCree into the ground.

“ _Enough!_ You are both _children_.” Genji hisses, putting himself in between the two, “There are still omnics attacking, or have you forgotten?”

Both men stare each other down before turning their backs and adjusting the grip on their weapons. Their shots would be for omnics and not each other. This time.

 

\----

 

The exercise made it abundantly clear that the new Overwatch was unequipped and unfamiliar with each other. Winston, not wanting to step on anyone’s toes yet as the commander, requires each member to log twelve hours a week in the communal training area.

Many found it easy, usually travelling down with their group of companions to spar, workout, or use Athena’s simulations. Many times you could find Hana and Lucio working on their aim in the range, or watch Brigitte and Pharah besting each other on the mats. 

McCree and Genji liked to wrestle every once in awhile, but they were older and less keen to throw out their backs, and more inclined for competition. Usually it came down to who could kill more bots in a simulation within a time limit.

It wasn’t a shock when Hanzo began to hover around Genji, eventually joining in for friendly competition as he logged his hours. He would stay on Genji’s left, quietly keeping up with the more friendly competitors. 

“Jesse, Hanzo, could I have dibs on the next wave? I feel like I need to release some built up energy.” 

“Dragon kills don’t count, but do as ya please. Scores ain’t changin’.” 

“Fair! Rest for a moment.” Genji advises, unsheathing his sword and diving into the fray surrounded by a cloud of green. 

“Heh, sometimes I forget that he’s a lil’ younger than me, then I wonder why he’s trainin’ with an old man and not bestin’ the kids.” Jesse muses, realizing his only listener was Hanzo and isn’t surprised he doesn’t get an answer. McCree shrugs it off and squats down on the floor, carefully checking over Peacekeeper’s barrel as they wait for Genji to wear himself out. 

He tsks when he finds gunpowder clogging up his chamber and realizes that’s why he’d been shootin’ a lil’ to the left. He blows down the chamber and brings it up to his eye for a better look. 

“You weapon is undignified.” Hanzo mumbles after a moment, brows pulled together, “How you belonged to a stealth unit I cannot understand. The shots ring in my ears after you fire it. Surely you could find something… better.” 

“Hey now.” McCree narrows his eyes, points a finger at Hanzo as he easily slots Peacekeeper back together with one hand and slides her into her holster, “Don’t know why ya think it’s right to insult another man’s weapon but I’ll have ya mind yer own business.” 

“Simply an observation. I wish for every member of this team to be at their best.” Hanzo says, turning his face away. 

“An’ yer implyin’ I ain’t the best? I’ll have you know I’m the best damn shot in this whole buildin’ and I won’t be bested by a man with a glorified slingshot.” McCree challenges, already pulling Peacekeeper out of her holster again, fingers itching for a duel.

McCree watches fingers dance over a bowstring and pull it taught, “You do not know technique. _Patience_.” Hanzo spits, causing McCree’s hackles to rise.

“Don’t need ‘em when you got the skill, the eye for a kill.” McCree points to his eye and winks.

Their banter is interrupted when Genji comes over,looking spent and happy, “I believe I'll take a break, if you both would like to continue?”

McCree smirks and makes an ‘after you’ gesture to Hanzo as he calls up to the ceiling, “ _D_ _eadeye Horde Sequence,_ please Athena, Darlin’. If you don't mind.”

Sometimes McCree liked to test how many bots he was able to kill at once with a deadeye. Sixty bots flood into the area and Jesse smirks. Game on.

McCree quickly finds his new favourite game, ‘put a bullet in the bot Hanzo is aiming for’. For each kill he takes Jesse is able to watch Hanzo tense, grit his teeth, get a bit sloppy. It’s the tenth bot that Hanzo shoots that already has a bullet in it that makes him snap. He doesn’t say a word, doesn’t yell, just lets an arrow fly and his dragons consume the rest of the horde. 

“Hey now! Told ya, dragons don’t count on the score! Let’s reset, Athe-” 

“There will be no reset.” Hanzo growls, rounding on McCree, “You and your weapon are both undignified, ignorant, and brutish.” 

“Now, it ain’t nice to get nasty jus’ cause you were losin’.” McCree smirks, raising his hands amicably and loving how Hanzo raises to the bait. Serves the arrogant son of a bitch right, callin’ his sidearm anything but her proper name. 

“This is not about losing, this is about you purposely sabotaging me.” Hanzo accuses and McCree smirks. 

“Ya should’a shot faster… or does that go against yer rule ‘bout havin’ _patience?”_

Apparently Hanzo doesn't have that much patience.

McCree side steps, lifting an arm to block Hanzo's jab at his face. He grabs Hanzo's wrist with his prosthetic and twists, earning a grunt in response - and a kick to the shins as Hanzo cocks his legs and strikes Mccree directly in his bad knee.

“Motherfuck-”

When Jesse's leg gives out beneath him Hanzo uses the opportunity to yank his arm free and pounce, knocking the cowboy to the ground and pinning him with his arms and legs.

Hanzo pants above him, demanding, “Forfeit. I have you beat, _cowboy.”_

McCree thrashes like a caged animal, unable to move his arms and legs in Hanzo's hold.

Then he stills, looks up, and headbutts Hanzo in his smirking face.

Hanzo splutters, releasing McCree in surprise as he curses the man out, “Fuck! You brute, Hooligan, _fool!”_

McCree readies himself to retaliate but when he moves he feels himself surrounded by a golden glow, a warm hand pulling on the back of his shirt. An echoing voice rings out, comforting and chastising.

“ _I believe that is enough, from both of you. Cease this foolishness. You are not enemies.”_

Zenyatta scolds in all his transcendent glory, holding the two men apart with golden arms. McCree can feel the pain in his knee leaving and watches the blood on Hanzo upper lip recede. 

As the glow fades each man has the decency to look reprimanded when Genji approaches, standing in between the two. He is silent for a long moment, only speaking when Zenyatta lays a comforting hand on his arm. 

“I am disappointed in you both.” He states, and that hurts more than any kick to the shins.

 

\----

 

“Genji, there ain’t no way in _hell_ -”

“You do not have to like each other, you just need to work together.”

“I don’t even think we can manage that. Winston knew I was gonna be pissed.” McCree grunts, pacing back and forth across the small space of his dorm. “That’s why he sent you! That’s cheatin’, everyone knows I can’t say no to ya.” He complains, throwing his hands up in the air. He wasn’t sure what they were trying to pull but this had to be a punishment for them getting into that fist fight the week before.

Genji sighs from where he’s lounging on McCree’s bed, watching the cowboy pace uselessly, “You do not have to be friends, at this point I realize that is not a possibility, but you are co-workers. All you need to do is determine what these men possess in the shipping containers at the harbour. Winston fears it is weapons and in that case we will push an attack to neutralize the threat based upon your intel.”

“Why does it gotta be with yer brother again?” McCree groans, sitting down on the bed next to Genji. 

“ _Because-”_ Genji rolls over and flicks McCree’s ear, “- you have both lived your lives on the run. You are stealthy… when you take your spurs off. It will be beneficial to work together. If I hear you are unpleasant I will not be happy. There was no need for that stunt.”

“ He threw the first punch…” Mccree mumbles, looking down at his friend with an absolutely pitiful expression, “... you’ve been gettin’ along okay?” He asks softly, because it wasn’t really about him, even if he was projecting onto the situation.

Genji blinks, regarding McCree for a moment before nodding, “Yes, Jesse, we have. Although, as you all heard, we have had a few disagreements. There was much to discuss and years of emotions to sift through. That is nowhere near finished, of course, it has only been a few months… but I believe we are on a path to reconciliation. I made him laugh yesterday and for a moment it was as if we were children again, before he caught himself and replaced his scowl.”

“I didn’ think he could do anythin’ but scowl.” McCree mutters, looking down at Genji’s face. He sees that his friend is truly happy about the progress they’ve made and sighs, “... We’ll work together. I won’t pick a fight. This time. Ain’t gonna promise ‘bout others.”

“Oh! Yes! Thank you!” Genji sits up and hugs McCree around the middle with both arms, taking a moment to nuzzle his face into the larger man’s chest,  “I know it is not easy, Jess. I know your resentment runs deep… but please, try to complete the mission as if I was at your side.” 

“I guess I can’t fail it now, wouldn’t wanna let ya down.” Jesse sighs, patting Genji’s on his back as he pulls away and gets to his feet. 

“You will not, I’m sure. I need to tell Winston. You and Hanzo leave in the morning. No jingle jangle.” He reminds before slipping out of the room.

Jesse looks down at his booted feet and sighs, “No jingle jangle.”

 

\----

 

The serape McCree dons is black with muted gold accents, he blends into the night, aided by the fact the spurs have been removed from his boots. He’s following behind Hanzo. beneath the towering walls of the shipping containers, and they have not spoken so much as a word to one another since departing for their mission. They work quickly, quietly, and motion to each other with hand signals. McCree is thankful for the professionalism as it allows him to push negative Hanzo related feelings the back burner. There was many of those dancing in McCree’s mind, considering the last time they’d been in a room together it had ended in bruised legs and bloody noses.

They approach a section of shipping containers that are placed a like a fortress, with one area to enter and the openings of the containers facing the inside. From what they can tell these men have paid off the shipyard owners and McCree knows this operation runs deep. Overwatch is going to have to dig if they want to stop all illegal trafficking but this was a good first step to unearthing the corruption.

McCree looks to the entrance of the encampment where two armed guards are standing and raises a brow at Hanzo, who simply motions to the walls of the container they’re pressed up against.

McCree stares at Hanzo incredulously and can’t even object when Hanzo starts to easily scale up the side of the container. ‘ _You fucker!’_ McCree thinks, his expression going livid as Hanzo reaches down and offers him a hand, beckoning him up. Unfortunately Jesse knows there is no other choice and he reaches up and grasps Hanzo’s wrist tightly and pulls himself up, boots knocking quietly against the metal. He perches by Hanzo who just smirks at his expense and McCree wills himself to ignore it. They have a job to do.  

Inside the fortress of containers is about fifteen men, armed and patrolling the area.

McCree looks at Hanzo, raises a brow. How in the hell were they supposed to get into one of the containers like this? If they dared to step down they’d be seen, and even if McCree thinks they can take on these men he’d rather avoid the confrontation without backup. 

Hanzo pulls an arrow from his quiver and silently nocks it into place. McCree watches curiously, staring at the strange arrowhead as Hanzo draws his bowstring and releases it. When the arrow hits the ground in corner of the compound McCree immediately understood the purpose of it. The sonar revealed unseen life hidden behind walls, so much was clear from the dozens of figures huddled inside of the shipping containers.

It wouldn't have been the first time McCree had seen a group of kidnapped and trafficked children. Deadlock liked to pick up strays and steal bargaining chips whenever they could, clearly not beneath using a child's pain to get what they wanted.

Hell, he was one of those kids, the only difference was he’d been ‘useful’. Even then he wasn’t free from the abuse. McCree never wanted any other kid to go through the _bullshit_ he was forced to endure - and forced to inflict on others - just because they were caught up in shitty situations they never asked for.  

That’s why he stands, Peacekeeper sliding smoothly out of her holster. He can feel Hanzo scramble to pull him back down, hiss, ‘ _McCree, what are you do-!?’_

But his revolver is already raised, a deadly glint in his eye as he stares down every single one of the men in the courtyard. It doesn’t matter that there’s more men than bullets in his gun, especially when he won’t be missing any of these shots.

“ _It’s High Noon.”_

Six shots ring out and fifteen men fall dead. McCree watches as the two armed guards from out front run into the compound. He spins his gun, reloads, and puts a bullet through each of their skulls before they even have time to raise their guns.

“That was _not_ the plan, McCree!” Hanzo yells, getting to his feet and stomping up to the cowboy while McCree is making his way off the roof of the container. “McCree! Stop this instant. This is not what we came here to do, it was recon. Is your idiotic head able to comprehend _stealth and recon,_ or is it just the constant playing of banjo music in your brain? _McCree_!”

McCree comes up to the one container that was empty, save for one person. At least that’s what the sonic arrow had shown. He swings the large door open and ducks as a bullet comes whizzing past.

“Hey there.” McCree drawls, taking a shot and knocking the pistol right out of the man’s hand. Before the guy can get a word in edgewise McCree is on him, leaving delicious indents of metal all over the man’s face. “Whatcha’ got goin’ on here, huh?” He asks, the man on his back with McCree over his him, bringing his fist down again and again.

“You think it’s funny?! Fuckin’ with kids!? I’ll show you how _goddamn_ funny it is!”

There’s blood in the joints of his hand but McCree doesn’t care. People like this didn't get to keep their blood in their bodies-

A hand grabs his arm just as he pulls it back, “He is unconscious. That is enough.”

McCree struggles against the hold, only stilling when he turns and sees the look on Hanzo’s face. Shock, anger, but underlying it all is _concern._ He growls, yanking his arm away and getting to his feet, back to his partner, “Call Overwatch.” He says nothing more as he leaves the shipping container to breathe.

 

\----

 

McCree lights up another cigarillo with shaking hands, lifting the cigar to his lips and taking a long drag. Beneath his perch on top of one of the shipping containers he can watch their team at work. It hadn't taken long for them to arrive and Angela and Zenyatta were already tending to the wounded children, while Lena, Hana, and Brigitte occupied the children who were waiting on their jet.

McCree doesn't turn when he hears someone approaching cause he already knows who it is by the metallic steps.

“A total of seventy-two children were being held captive by these men.” Hanzo states and when he steps up beside him McCree can see the scowl on the archer's face.

“Well, guess it's a good thing they sent us ‘ere then.” Jesse mumbles, chewing at the end of his cigar as he waits for the other shoe to drop.

“A good thing your little _outburst_ did not end with all of them being killed. “

There it is.

“Well, it didn't. If ya got somethin’ more to say ya best spit it out, I'm not in the mood to be lectured by _you.”_

Hanzo's face twists in anger, “We had a mission. We had _orders.”_

“Hey, if you wanna play by the rules be my guest, but that ain't my way.” McCree shrugs.

“Clearly. I should not have expected professionalism from such an unkempt hooligan.”

McCree shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath through his nose. He lights another smoke, keeping his hands busy as they itch for a fight, “ I'm serious, I ain't in the mood and I need you to _step off.”_

When their eyes meet Hanzo must see something feral and angry curled up inside of him, because he stops, going quiet for a moment. McCree rises to his feet and stomps out his cigar with enough force to rattle the crate.

“Tomorrow evening-” Hanzo says before McCree can flee, “ - I would like to have a fair shooting contest. I was surprised by your ability today, despite it having been out of line with our mission directives. I should not have insulted your weapon nor let my anger get the best of me, it was inappropriate. I would find it… agreeable, if you would join me.”

“Sounds an awful lot like an apology. Genji make you say that?” McCree smirks.

Hanzo bristled, “I am being genuine even if I had encouragement from my brother.”

“Then give me a real apology.”

Hanzo blinks, mouth falling open, “...excuse me?”

McCree rests his hands on his hips and raises a brow, “Ya heard me. Say you're sorry. Then I'll go shoot with ya and we'll both make Genji happy.”

Hanzo's got a wonderfully constipated look on his face and Jesse is loving every second of this. He waits, wondering if Hanzo will throw away his pride for a moment and apologize.

“I am sorry.” Hanzo says through gritted teeth, and if it hadn't been for Genji McCree doubts he ever would've heard that.

“Apology accepted so long as this lil’ competition don't end up in another scrap.” McCree warns, watching Hanzo nod curtly.

“I will see that it does not… seven-thirty is acceptable?”

McCree lights up another smoke, the ghost of a tremor still present in his fingers, “I ain’t a busy man. Works for me.” He says, jumping down off the shipping container to go help the others. He doesn’t look back to see if Hanzo follows.

 

\----

 

“He was rude as hell the whole time, ‘specially after. I don’t listen to ‘banjo music’. It’s country and western.” McCree grumbles, squeezing onto Genji’s hand as the two walk toward the training bay. 

“I am just happy you accepted his invitation.” Genji hums, swinging their arms back and forth gently. 

“Wasn’t really his invitation, you probably guilted him into askin’.” McCree points out, “Surprised he still asked after gettin’ pissed off ‘bout the mission.”

“I am quite pleased that he did. It is a reflection of his character that he soldiered on and asked you. He is quite stubborn.” 

“Oh, I know that much.” McCree yawns and rubs at his face with his free hand, “Lucky I wanna outshoot ‘im or I’d just go back to my room an’ sleep.” 

They hadn’t left the shipyard until eight-thirty this morning and McCree had been too keyed up to sleep. He’d gone right to Genji and given the man a play-by-play of the mission, complaining the whole time about Hanzo being an ass, and telling Genji how he’d acted out.

“You are tired, I know… how are you otherwise?” Genji asks gently, giving McCree’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“We saved the kids, that’s what matters… brought up some old memories though. Probably gonna be stuck with those for awhile.” 

“Deadlock.” Genji says. It’s not a question. 

“Mmm, ain’t it always? Bastards.” There’s a tremble in McCree’s hand and Genji’s grip tightens, holding him steady. 

“My offer remains, if you wished to speak with Zenyatta he would welcome you. There are things we should not carry alone, that we cannot sort out by ourselves. I think that talking about-” 

“Don’t, Genji, not today. I know yer probably right but I ain’t ready to tell no one else, even someone as understanding as Zenyatta. Best let sleeping mistakes lie for now.” McCree insists. 

“... except they are not sleeping. They are awake and they torment you. They caused you to lash out and kill eighteen men in an instant. That is a powerful mistake plaguing you.”

“Oh look, the training bay.” McCree grins, pulling Genji along. The smile on his face wavers and he knows Genji sees right through him, “Maybe we’ll talk about this later minus your brother, and plus a bottle’a hooch.” He offers, looking away so he doesn’t have to see Genji’s disappointment. 

Hanzo is already there waiting for them, filling the quiver on his back with arrows, “Genji, I do hope you will be our referee.” 

“That’s why I am here. Do you think I am so naive that I would leave you two alone? It would end in disaster and more broken noses.” Genji chuckles, releasing McCree’s hand in favour of taking a seat behind the range where he can observe them.  

“ This is a fair shootin’ match, it won't come to that.” McCree says, smiling just a touch at Hanzo. The man doesn't smile back but he also doesn't scowl so that's something.  

“No dragons and no deadeye. Keep to your side of the range. Whoever gets the most headshots wins!” Genji declares, looking up at the ceiling. “Athena, mind running a horde simulation for us?”

“ _Of course, Genji. Deadeye Horde Sequence activated. Best of luck.”_

All else falls away for McCree and the targets on his side of the range are his only focus. From the twang of the bowstring beside him he knows Hanzo is performing in the same hypnotic manner, landing headshot after headshot as the bots approach. 

It’s a matter of muscle memory for McCree. Pull the trigger, cock the lever, pull, cock, reload. He can feel it in his mind, the telltale pull of the Deadeye, but he sticks to the rules and shoots the old fashioned way. Then he misses his first shot.  
It bounces off the shoulder of one of the bots and falls away. The ting of the metal makes Hanzo jump and McCree sees that his arrow goes sideways into the chest of a bot. 

Jesse can’t help but grin and tip his hat, “Sorry ‘bout that, partner. Won’t miss the next one.” he promises, and Hanzo actually smiles.

“See to it that you do not. Or else I will claim victory.”

“Like I’d let ya!” McCree huffs, falling back into his zone.

He doesn’t miss a single more shot and when the simulation runs to its end Athena announces, “ _A tie. Excellent work, Agents.”_

Jesse pulls off his hat so he can wipe the sweat off his brow with the edge of his serape, “Shit, couldn’t miss a single one. That was some damn fine shootin’, Hanzo. Thanks for havin’ another competition with me, seein’ as I was a tad rude in our last one.” 

“It was my pleasure. That was … fun.” Hanzo says, clearly surprised at the realization that it had been just that. Fun.

McCree is able to get lost in the illusion that he was just having a competition with a friend, and for a moment he forgets that it’s Hanzo and what he’s done. Hell, when Hanzo isn’t being a dick he was decent company. Quiet, stoic, and McCree thinks he wouldn’t mind shooting with him again. 

That was until Jesse watches Genji approach Hanzo and pat his brother on the back, excitedly praising his brother’s performance. Hanzo still has a delicate smile on his lips and seems happy to see his brother talking so animatedly. As Genji speaks the scars on his face ripple and move, telling the story of what Hanzo had done to him. 

That familiar anger and self-loathing rises up in his chest and McCree turns, sliding Peacekeeper into her holster before he does something stupid. 

Hanzo shouldn’t get to smile so easily at the man he’d killed. 

“McCree?” It’s Hanzo who calls after him.

“More tired than I thought, after that mission. Think I’m gonna turn in.” He gives a little wave over his shoulder and doesn’t turn around as he exits the training bay.  


\----

  
“Perhaps your brother would spar with you, Genji.” Zenyatta suggests, unbothered by the eyes that turn his way. 

McCree tilts his hat up off the face to watch the scene, rousing from the little cat nap he’d been having off to the side of the mats. Just cause he had to log so many hours in the bay didn’t mean he couldn’t do them asleep. 

It had been a few weeks since their first fair training session and the trend continued. Sometimes McCree still found it necessary to walk away or step back in the presence of the brothers but he managed to be here and be civil… enough. That did not mean snide comments were not passed back and forth but he hadn’t punched Hanzo again so that was progress. 

Genji is holding two katanas in hand, his and another from the armory. From the look of things he’d been trying to hand one to Zenyatta but the omnic was refusing it. 

“Zen, please-” Genji looks a little uncomfortable, not personally, but clearly on behalf of Hanzo. 

Hanzo was at the edge of their mat, eyes blown wide and hands held in fists at his side. 

“No one else is skilled in the katana, it would be ideal for you both to test your skills.” Zenyatta presses, and Jesse wonders what the hell the monk is thinking. 

Genji considers for a moment longer before lifting up the katana and offering it to Hanzo, “I would be honored to spar you, brother.” He tells him. 

Hanzo stares at the katana, eyes distant and glassy. McCree can see that Hanzo has already gone far away in his own head before he even grabs the hilt. When he does grab the hilt it is not skill that drives him to unsheathe the sword and grip it, but muscle memory from hours of training. It was the same mindlessness that McCree possessed when he spun his revolver in his hand effortlessly, even if his mind was distant. 

“On three, Hanzo.” Genji says, falling into stance. He counts down slowly, waiting until he hits one to surge forward- then stops. 

Hanzo hasn’t moved. He doesn't raise his sword to block nor step out of the way of Genji’s strike. Genji’s sword rests against the side of Hanzo’s throat but Hanzo makes no move to get away, even now, he just looks forward. 

Genji takes a moment before stepping back and lowering his sword, “... brother?” He asks, flinching as empty eyes flash up to look at him. 

When Hanzo sees Genji’s face he drops his sword, the blade rattling against the ground.

“Hanzo?” Genji presses and Hanzo chest heaves with the effort it takes him to breathe.

“I-I am sorry.” He chokes and Genji rushes to assure him.

“We do not have to spar! Forget the suggestion, no harm do- Hanzo?!”

McCree's seen countless men fall victim to panic attacks over the years, an unfortunate side effect of their profession. He watches Hanzo's knees buckle as he clutches his chest, unable to catch his breath. Genji seems lost on what to do so McCree stands and walks over until he's in between the two brothers.

“Hanzo, can I touch ya?”

“ _What?”_ Hanzo grits, sinking to the mats and McCree goes with him, kneeling.

“Can I touch yer hand?” McCree clarifies , staring into Hanzo's face, reading the panic and desperation there.

Hanzo doesn't say anything but he does nod, and McCree grasps Hanzo's left hand firmly with his metal one.

“Gonna count down from ten. For each number I want ya to give my hand a squeeze, okay? Squeeze hard, I can’t feel it on this one.”

Another nod and McCree begins his countdown, “Ten.” Squeeze. “Nine.” There's no squeeze and McCree repeats, “Nine.” Hanzo blinks at him and then squeezes.

Slowly Hanzo begins to breathe and by four the panic in his face is being replaced with embarrassment and shame.

“So’kay. Look at my hand. Three.” Squeeze. “Two.” Squeeze. “One. That's it, easy now.” McCree soothes, watching as Hanzo tries to curl in on himself, away from the prying eyes of others. 

McCree pulls off his serape and drapes the swath of fabric around Hanzo’s shoulder and over his head, “If you can stand I’ll walk out with ya, alright?”

It takes him a moment but eventually Hanzo shakily rises to his feet, holding onto McCree’s hand for support. Jesse doesn’t spare a glance at the others and guides Hanzo out of the bay and into the hallway. They don’t make it far before Hanzo stops, leaning his back against the wall with his eyes shut tightly. 

“... _why?”_ _  
_

McCree is still holding onto Hanzo’s hand and he’s asking himself that same question. Why? He hadn’t needed to help Hanzo through his panic attack. Hell, he could have let Hanzo go through the whole damn thing and _suffer_. 

Except looking at Hanzo now, the man small and shaking under his serape, McCree wants to comfort and not punish. The panic attack was an open display of Hanzo’s remorse for his actions and it left Jesse breathless. 

“... I can’t shoot rifles.” Is what he tells Hanzo,  a metal thumb rubbing circles into Hanzo’s skin. “If someone puts one in my hand I freeze up, so I get it. The way things stick in our memory… s’why you use a bow now.” 

Hanzo nods, eyes unsteady as they look around, wondering if anyone had followed them. 

“Y-Yes, I retired my katana after… after. I have not actually held one since and therefore could not predict my reaction. I never expected-” A quiet sob works its way out of Hanzo’s throat and he squeezes his eyes shut. 

“Easy there, s’alright now, nothin’ happened.” McCree soothes.

Hanzo proceeds to take a series of deep breaths before lifting himself from the wall and releasing McCree's hand, “I… I need to go be with my thoughts.” He pauses, his back to the cowboy. 

“Thank you. What you did… I did not deserve it, but I do appreciate it.”

“Hey, it ain’t no thing. You get some rest.” McCree insists, and watches as Hanzo nods and walks away. 

McCree has the realization that Hanzo has taken off with his serape and wonders how he’s going to get it back.  
  
\----

 

McCree didn't have to worry about his serape. The next morning when McCree leaves his room, shuffling sleepily toward the kitchen for some coffee, he stumbles over his favourite garment outside of his door. He looks down and sees his serape delicately folded into a square.  It looks clean and McCree worries for a second when he picks it up that Hanzo had washed it and shrunk the poor thing. McCree is shocked to see the wool had been stretched and dried properly and it smelt _amazing._ Like sandalwood and sweet cigarette smoke with a hint of that fresh detergent smell.

Jesse wraps the familiar cloth around his body and sighs, loving how cozy he was in his sweats and t-shirt with the wool surrounding him.

As he walks toward the kitchen he considers the gesture Hando has made and debates the meaning behind it. Perhaps it was in thanks for his actions yesterday and the comfort provided during Hanzo’s panic attack. McCree thinks that would be likely but wonders if there's more. Was Hanzo trying to quell the animosity between then?

McCree wants to hate the idea, keep the fire of protectiveness and anger alive for Genji, but finds the toxic feelings soothed and blanketed. Hanzo showed yesterday that he would never raise a hand against his brother again.

When McCree enters the kitchen he stops, watching two brothers laugh together over a tray of breakfast and cups of steaming tea. As he walks forward, coming up behind Genji, Hanzo looks up at him and his eyes land on the serape.  
McCree rests his hands on Genji’s shoulders and the man doesn’t startle, just leans back into the touch, “I heard you coming.” He informs McCree who just rolled his eyes. He gives Genji’s shoulders a gentle squeeze before pulling up a chair at the end of the table between the two brothers. 

“Nothin’ gets by you.” Jesse grins, picking up Genji’s chopsticks and stealing a piece of grilled mackerel off their tray. Then a scoop of rice. _Then_ a little bit of the pickled veggies on the plate, and was that daiko-

“If you would like your own plate I could make more.” Hanzo offers, an amused smile on his lips, “That way Genji may have his chopsticks back as well.” 

“You made this?” McCree asks, ignoring Genji as the man tries to steal his chopsticks back and reaching for another bite of the fish, “I don’t wanna impose but if there’s more I won’t say n- You know Genji it’s real rude to interrupt a man while he’s eatin’!” McCree laughs as the chopsticks are pulled from his grasp and he gets back to his feet to actually get the coffee he came for, followed by Hanzo who insists on sharing.

“It is no trouble. I think Genji is going to finish off that whole tray the moment I have my back turned anyhow.” 

That fact is made true by the sudden sound of chopsticks scraping the bottom of an empty bowl. 

As they reach a kitchen, out of earshot of Genji at their table, McCree says softly, “Hey, thank you.” 

Which startles Hanzo who is delicately filling two bowls with rice from the rice cooker, “... what on earth are you thanking me for?” 

“For bringin’ me my serape back as fresh an’ clean this mornin’. Didn’t have to go through all the trouble, know wool ain’t the easiest to wash an’ dry.” 

“ _Serape_.” Hanzo repeats, the word new and foreign on his tongue, “I do not- is it not just a poncho?” 

McCree laughs, hiding his grin behind the collar of the garment in question, “Not quite. While they got a lot of similarities, usually ponchos always have a head hole in ‘em.” 

“Yours is just a blanket.” Hanzo agrees and McCree chuckles as he runs the coffee pot, sighing as the smell hits his nose. Sweet, sweet caffeine. 

“It is. A _special_ blanket. Worn in Mexico by a bunch of different indigenous groups, the Navajo, the Aztecs, all had a version. Many thought wearin’ bright colours would bring ya favour and keep evil spirits away.” Jesse tells him. 

“Do you believe that? Is that your reason for wearing it?” 

“Nah, but my Mama did. She wove this for my Pa a long time ago and it sure as hell didn’t stop ‘im from gettin’ shot. It sure as hell hasn’t stopped me from gettin’ shot _at.”_ McCree raises a mug in Hanzo’s direction, “Coffee?” 

“Please. One milk, no sugar. Pickled daikon?” 

“ _Please_ , an a lil’ bowl of that miso?” 

“Of course.” Hanzo delicately ladles some soup into a bowl, “Have both your parents passed, then?” 

“Yup.” McCree says, not offering anymore explanation and he’s thankful Hanzo chooses to steer the conversation back to its original purpose.

“I should still be thanking you, in the end, for giving me a garment that meant so much to you in hopes to comfort me. It was… successful. Thank you.” 

“Surprised ya let me, to be honest.”

“I am surprised you offered, considering your opinion of me.”

McCree frowns, “An’ what opinion would that be?” he asks, finding himself on the receiving end of a dull glare.

“Pure, justified hatred and disdain.” Hanzo says dryly and McCree sighs, stirring milk into two cups.

“I don't hate you, Hanzo.”

Hanzo’s scoff is absolutely dripping with disbelief, “If you do not hate me than what is this song and dance we have been doing?”

“... misplaced animosity on my part.” Jesse mumbles.

“Misplaced? What is misplaced? I grievously harmed your best friend I should be- wait. No. You will not _pity_ me after what you saw yesterday. I refuse. If you loathe me continue to do so, I will have it over your sympathy.”

“Hanzo, this ain’t pity.” McCree says softly, trying to soothe the rolling tide of Hanzo’s anger without getting sucked into it, “It’s… understandin’. Realizin’ your remorse for what’cha did. I didn’t see that before. Do now.” He picks up the tray of breakfast and coffee to occupy his hands, observing Hanzo from the corner of his eye.

Jesse watches Hanzo go still, hands gripping the edge of the counter as he takes in Jesse’s words.

“You… mean this?” 

“Sure do. Yer just tryin’ to be better.” McCree knows the struggle of fighting past sins. He knows what it’s like to want to be better than those mistakes. 

“Y-Yes. While I would not blame you for any remaining hostility know that I am doing that, becoming better. For Genji.”

“ I can tell. “ McCree nods his head toward the table. Seated there is Genji who is animatedly talking to Zenyatta who had floated over a few moments ago. When he catches sight of the two watching him Genji waves widely and beckons them back over. “He loves ya.” 

“He does.” Hanzo says, a wistful smile gracing his lips.

McCree knows that Hanzo doesn’t understand _why_ but he knows the man understands how important it is. 

“Let’s go back, huh? I’m starvin’!” 

“Yes, I believe the coffee is going cold.” Hanzo agrees, allowing McCree to lead them back to the table so they can be with Genji once more.

 

\----

“This is the _oldest_ bar in Gibraltar. We’ve been coming here since we were teenagers. They say it was a Tavern back in the fourteen hundreds, and it shows considering the quality of their house wine. Share a bottle with us, I insist.” 

“I would but I am already committed to my choice.” Hanzo, motioning to the bottle of wine half finished in front of him. 

“I’ll pass too, ain’t too keen on the fruity stuff.” Jesse makes a small face and Hanzo rolls his eyes. 

“Uncultured.” 

“Well you ain’t got proper taste buds if yer drinkin’ that shi-” 

“We will join you.” Zenyatta interrupts, “I may not be able to sample it but I am sure Genji will agree with you on your choice of wine.” 

“Yes, thank you for the offer!” Genji says, bowing his head slightly in thanks.

They follow three elderly men to a booth off in the corner, two bottles of ‘ _The Star Bar’_

wine in hand. It was a Saturday evening and the four had been restless sitting around the Watchpoint, watching as other Overwatch members ran around getting ready for nights in. Genji had suggested they needed a night out, and both Hanzo and McCree were inclined to agree. 

Comfy as the Watchpoint was McCree was used to a life on the road out under the stars, hopping between bars and motels and anywhere else that would let him loiter. It was different having a place to stay in between missions that wasn't chomping at the bit to kick him out, which of course he appreciated.  Except it didn't mean he couldn't go out and stretch his legs for a bit.

As their companions leave them an awkward silence falls over Hanzo and McCree, disrupting the calm that had followed the group. While they aren't constantly itching to fight anymore they aren't necessarily friends and generally someone else is there to act as a buffer between the men.

A buffer presents itself five minutes into the silence. He's handsome, a few inches shorter than Jesse with short hair slicked back against his scalp. He's got that five o'clock shadow that Jesse's never liked, preferring his men with full beards. The man is dressed in clothes resembling what hanzo is wearing - dark jeans and a button down - expect Hanzo’s shirt is navy and this man's is violet. He looks like the kind of high society guy Hanzo might like and McCree turns himself a way a touch to give them some privacy. That's when he feels a gentle touch to his flannel covered bicep and watches Hanzo’s eyes train on them like a hawk.

“Are you by yourself?” The man asks.

“Nah, but I ain't with anyone lookin’ for what yer after.” McCree jokes, delighted when the man laughs and blushes. McCree _loved_ being charming and forward, drawing delight from the reactions it drew from people, especially when they got flustered.

“Well then, I suppose it's my lucky evening. Could I buy you a drink, Mister..?”

“Morricone. Joel Morricone.” McCree presents his flesh hand to shake, “And as kind as ya are- and as handsome-” he punctuates it with a wink, “I'm out with a couple friends and ain't lookin’ fer company tonight. Thank you fer the offer tho’, I'm mighty flattered.”

McCree tilts his head toward Hanzo as the man shakes his hand, looking disappointed.

“Oh of course. It was nice to meet you, Joel. Hope you have a goodnight.”

“Have a good one.” McCree tips his hat in farewell.

When he is out of earshot Hanzo speaks quietly, “You needn't have turned down his proposition on my behalf. I would not have been offended if you were to seek… different company.”

“Huh? Oh, I wasn’t interested in him anyway.” McCree says and can feel Hanzo’s eyes bore into him, “Yes?”

“Then what was that? With the winking and the hat-tipping and _flirting?”_

Jesse laughs softly and turns so he's facing Hanzo instead of the bar, “You ain't caught on yet? That's just who I am, _Darlin’.”_ He winks for extra flare and snickers when Hanzo glares at him.

“So you are just naturally obnoxious.”

“Hey now-”

“That… that is not quite what I meant.” Hanzo rushes to correct.

“Better not’a been. I know we're past throwin' hands now but we can easily fall into it if ya sass me.”

“I meant to say you are naturally loud and outspoken. I see you behave in the same manner with those you have known a long time and those you have just met. It… looks _exhausting.”_ Hanzo frowns and Jesse laughs.

“Well I've always been a people person, don't mean I don’t like alone time or quiet.”

“I have never seen you quiet.” Hanzo scoffs, “Did you truly not like that man?”

“Ask Genji. We've spent a lot of quiet nights together. And I mean, sure he was handsome, but I'm old, Hanzo.”

“I am older than you and still fully capable of sex.”

“Hey now! That's not what I meant and you kno-!” Jesse catches Hanzo's smirk and grumbles, “Yer an asshole. I _meant_ that I'm older and I'm not too fond of casual encounters no more. Maybe when I was runnin’ with Blackwatch _sure_ , but there’s only so much’a my life left. Don’t feel like wastin’ it with strangers anymore. Plus I’m a bit of a romantic.” He whispers, like he’s letting Hanzo in on a secret. 

Hanzo looks confused, his brows drawing together as he tries to work out what he wants to ask. McCree doesn’t rush him, working on his whiskey as Hanzo tries to process what he wants to ask. 

“You… are searching for a more permanent relationship?” 

“I wouldn’t say searchin’. If the right person came ‘round I’d jump into that, fer sure, but you know our life. Hard to keep up relationships with friends let alone relationships with lovers.”

Hanzo seems to accept that and the silence spans between them. McCree thinks that Hanzo has dropped the subjects of relationships until the man clears his throat and offers, 

“I would not know how to be in a romantic relationship, I do not think. I have enough to handle rebuilding my relationship with Genji. Then I do not know if I deserve to care for someone like that- have someone care for me- after what I have done.”  
The last part is said in a whisper and McCree can feel every inch of Hanzo’s doubt because it is echoed in him. 

“I get’cha.” McCree assures, “We’ve both done shit, ya know? Feels like we shouldn’t pile that onto someone else, make it their problem. Feels like no one should love ya ‘cause yer you.” Jesse notices now that Hanzo’s bottle of _Mauro 2009_ is almost empty and it explains why the man allows sadness to pass so openly over his face. “ Hanzo…” 

“That is the exact feeling.” Hanzo says, closing his eyes and taking a few deep breaths. McCree watches the swell of Hanzo’s chest rise up and down as he breathes, calming himself, “To accept the affection from someone else, it does not feel just. I realized long ago I would most likely remain alone for my life. Now that I have Genji again I must reconsider all my other stances on relationships, including those of a romantic nature. If I… ‘fix’ things with Genji am I then allowed romance? I do not know how I earn the right to anything in my life.”

“Well… ya could go see if that guy would wanna spend an evenin’ with ya and go from there?” McCree suggests, loving when Hanzo starts to laugh. 

“Him and I? No, he is not my type.” Hanzo waves his hand dismissively. 

“What’cha mean? He was dressed nice, all done up.” 

“Too… stuffy.” Hanzo makes a face and it’s McCree’s turn to laugh. 

“Excuse me? Mr.Stuffy is judgin’ someone who was wearin’ the _exact_ same outfit?” 

“This-” Hanzo motions to his shirt, “- is clearly prussian blue. What he was wearing was obviously eggplant violet.” 

“What colour’s my shirt?” McCree asks, running his hands over his chest to straighten out the wrinkles in his flannel. 

“Clearly it is rotten cornfield.” 

McCree tries really hard not to rise to the bait but he can’t help it. Hanzo just ground his fucking gears. 

“I’ll have you know this is _wheat_ and it really compliments my dark complection, thank you very much.”

“It is passable.” Hanzo says noncommittally, “I believe that I am the same as you in only wanting a more permanent relationship. I do not think my life could use anymore instability.”

“Right? Got more than enough of that… hey, yer bottle’s almost gone. Lemme get’cha yer next one?” 

Hanzo eyes him suspiciously, “... not out of pity, correct?” 

“Nah, no pity. Just feelin’ generous. Accept it before I take back the offer.” 

“I accept.” 

McCree waves over the bartender and orders another bottle of wine and whiskey that’ll carry them both through the remainder of the evening, until Genji and Zenyatta have to carry them back out to the truck and into their respective rooms at the Watchpoint.

 

\----

 

“I could smell your disgusting cigars from inside.” Hanzo scolds.

McCree shrugs, taking another drag as he looks out over the water, “Close yer window. This spot has the best view.” It really did, the sun was setting and casting beautiful reflections and colours along the water.

“Not from my bedroom, just in the hallway. Also I was not looking to cease your actions… give me one.”

Jesse laughs, “Thought'cha called ‘em gross?”

“I have not had a smoke in over a week and watching you is a horrid temptation. Give me a cigar before I rip that from your hand.”

McCree snorts, “Hanzo Shimada needs a fix, huh?” he reaches under his serape into his shirt pocket and digs out another cigarillo.

Hanzo already has a lighter in hand and wastes no time taking it, lighting it, and pulling a long draw. He lets out a satisfied breath and a large cloud of smoke.

“Didn’ even know ya smoked.”

“I do it in private as I see it as an unsightly habit. I ran out, and while I requested a few cartons on my supply order it will not be in for another week. I could not go without any longer and refused to trouble myself with a trip into the city unnecessarily.”

“Oh? What kind ya smoke?” 

“Export A, in the green, full-flavoured...what are these?” Hanzo asks, curiously tilting the cigarillo in front of his face. 

“These’er Pom Pom Legacy but I ain’t that loyal to a brand like you. I’ll smoke whatever. Tho’ there is these lil’ honey bourbon cigars Backwoods makes.” Jesse lets out a low whistle, “Man could really fall in love with those, lemme tell ya. Usually keep a pack ‘round for a special occasion and try not to tempt myself.”

“ I am surprised you are able to resist temptation, you seem to be someone who indulges in all of your… _needs_.” 

“Ha, well sometimes I still like to save somethin’ special for myself. Why don’t’cha sit down and enjoy that? No need to be rushin’ away.” McCree slides over a bit and pats a space on the ground next to him.

Hanzo debates for only a moment before taking a seat and leaning his back against the wall behind them.

“I owe you, I will repay you when my supply arrives.” 

“That won’t be necessary, wouldn’t smoke yer kind anyway.” McCree teases, flicking the butt of his cigar out over the cliff and into the water. 

It must draw Hanzo’s eyes to the view as he says, “When I first arrived here I was so caught up in myself and what was happening I did not take the time to admire the view. That was an oversight on my part as it is quite beautiful… you have travelled much as well, correct? Where is your favourite place? Can this compare?”

“While this is real pretty it don’t compare ta home. I’m from Santa Fe and the deserts there are just beautiful. Nothin’ compared to wandering around, chasin’ lizards, lookin’ at the cacti. Guess they say no place like like home for a reason, huh?” 

“I relate to that sentiment. I have been to many places and yet my heart is never happier than when I see the cherry blossoms in bloom back in Hanamura. There are just certain memories that come along with the sight that… warm my heart, I suppose.” 

“Awww, ain’t that sweet.” McCree chuckles, flinching only the tiniest bit when Hanzo playfully elbows him, “I’m jus’ teasin’! I totally get’cha! Even if I don’t necessarily plan to go back home it’s still home, ya know?” 

“Likewise. I have too many unpleasant memories of Hanamura, I will never settle there again. Visit, perhaps, but before it was simply to honor Genji’s memory. Now that I see him everyday I doubt I will bother to make the trip.”

“Yeah, I ain’t got anyone back home either.” 

“Do you have no family?” 

“Nah, not alive. You an’ Genji got anyone?” 

“Distant cousins only at this point. Any of the closer relatives have passed or, well-” Hanzo flicks the butt of his cigar off the edge in the same way McCree had, “-I believe both Genji and I went on spree of revenge killings afterwards.” 

“Which means there ain’t many Shimada left… and that’s for the best?” 

“It is for the best.” Hanzo agrees, reaching out a hand, “If you plan to continue asking me questions about my family I will need another cigar or perhaps something stronger.” 

“You don’t gotta twist my arm, ya only gotta ask.” McCree snickers, pulling out another and handing it to Hanzo. He lets their fingers brush and lingers for a moment before pulling away. If it had been Genji he’d be sitting closer, their shoulders touching. McCree wonders how much the brothers are actually alike and slides over to do just that,the fabric of their shirt sleeves rustling as they touch. 

Hanzo stills, the hand holding the cigarillo still raised where he takes it. He seems to consider their position but chooses not to pull away and put space between them again. Hanzo simply busies himself with lighting his second smoke and this time takes it much slower, not as frantic on his inhale.

“I did that whole revenge thing myself, and hell, I was ‘round when Genji was doin’ his. Killin’ someone who did ya wrong… it feels good but it don't solve anythin’. Ya still got the bad memories and worse feelin's.”

“I killed the uncle who issued the command for Genji's m-murder.” Hanzo stutters just a bit and Jesse can feel him tense against his shoulder. “It was almost immediately after, before I fled and before Overwatch arrived. I made it twice as brutal. Who did you kill?”

“Don’ know how much ya know. Was in a gang before Reyes picked me up for Blackwatch.”

“Genji has told me this. He spoke highly of Reyes and detailed many of the heinous actions of the Deadlock gang. It was fortunate that you were taken in. “ Hanzo observes.

“More than fortunate. ‘Specially when Reyes took me back to Deadlock Gorge a year after so I could put a bullet between the leader’s eyes.” McCree frowns, trying not to draw up too many of the memories while still letting Hanzo in on the basics. Hanzo was right, if they kept talking like this they would both need something stronger.

“You needn't tell me more. I am glad you were able to take your revenge, even if it does not solve everything.”

McCree is thankful for the out and reaches a hand over to pat Hanzo on the arm, “ ‘preciate that. Still think all this talk has me itchin’ fer a drink tho’. You wanna join?”

Hanzo hums, reaching down to his waist and unhooking the gourd that was latched there. He pops the cork and offers it to McCree, “I am never unprepared.”

“Ya know, if yer carryin' booze with ya all the time that _may_ be the sign of a problem.” McCree chuckles, but holds the bottle out of Hanzo’s reach as he tries to take it back, “Hey, ain't complainin’. Came in handy.”

“Do not lecture me then. Just drink.” Hanzo chuckles.

The two end up passing the bottle back and forth between them until the sun sinks below the waves and there's only a few drops left.. It wasn't enough to get either men drunk by any means but McCree is feeling the pleasant buzz and tingling in his fingers. Fingers that are laying casually on Hanzo’s knee where he has it propped up.

“-he woke up and saw me standin’ over ‘im and paled like death had already hit. He said ‘M-McCree-’ with a whole stutter and everythin’. I said ‘You sonuvabitch, ya ain't causin’ anyone else anymore trouble. Ya got any last words?’. He opened his mouth to say somethin' stupid an I shot ‘im right between the eyes.”

“Was that the end of Deadlock? I do not know if I have ever seen them mentioned in the news.”

“Well this chick Ashe took up leadership and it's sort of a joke now. Less worldwide and more causin’ trouble in jus’ one county. Nothin’ to even mention, and certainly not the sorta group that gets Blackwatch showin’ up for ‘em.”

“Have you been back since then?”

“Nah. Almost went back when they needed someone to intercept an’ pick up Echo but Lena made out just fine runnin' that errand. Guess she ran into Ashe and thought she was a _real_ piece’a work too. Glad I didn' have to go… really don't know how you kept goin’ back to where it happened. Yer a lot stronger than me, facin’ the past like that.”

Hanzo goes quiet and McCree shifts so he can more easily watch the man's face and read his emotions. He looks troubled, unsure of how much to reveal.

“I may seem calm, collected  - other than in the moments where I have argued with you - but it took all my resolve to travel there. It was in honor of my beloved brother so I forced myself through the anguish despite how damaging it may have been. I do not blame you for avoiding the very place that causes you trauma.” Hanzo assures, and McCree is startled to feel a hand rest on top of his own. Maybe the brother's weren't so different, both lonely and seeking out the comfort and affection that McCree easily provided.

McCree feels warmth blooming in his chest that he normally only feels around Genji and some of the older Overwatch members. It startles him for just a moment before he decides he likes this feeling, likes being close to Hanzo as he would be to any other friend. McCree's always been an open book - about most things - but some of the hardships and struggles he's told Hanzo about are so private Jesse knows he'd only tell a friend.

McCree chuckles softly, shaking his head. Damn Shimadas...

Hanzo is frowning at him, “What is funny about that?”

“Wha-? No nothin’ ‘bout what you said. S’just… yer nice, Hanzo. Interestin’ to talk to. Never thought I'd be sayin’ that. I ‘preciate what yer sayin’ tho’, makes a lot of sense and it's real nice to hear someone who understands.” McCree shrugs noncommittally and meets Hanzo’s eyes.

Hanzo looks shocked, mouth hanging slightly open. “You think that I am nice?” he asks.

“When ya wanna be civil, sure. When ya don't yer as nasty as a rabid racoon diggin’ through the trash.”

“...excuse me?”

McCree can't help himself, head tilted back against the wall as he laughs. “Yer face! Oh christ yer lookin’ like an angry ‘coon right now. Hanzo, oh my god-” he laughs louder as he's smacked in the shoulder.

“I do not look like your trash rodents. Take that back immediately!” 

“Never.” McCree snickers, pushing himself up to his feet, “I gotta turn in, Han’, gettin’ pretty sleepy. You gonna be able to get back to yer room?” 

“I am not a child, I do not need you to hold my hand.” Hanzo scoffs, getting to his feet, “... thank you for sharing the evening with me. It was pleasant.” 

“I’ll take that as high praise comin’ from you!” McCree grins, patting Hanzo between the shoulders, “Have a goodnight!” He says, givin’ a little wave before turning and walking away, a warm feeling in his belly as he hears Hanzo behind him. 

“Goodnight, Jesse.”

 

\----

 

McCree marches down the hall, a whistle on his lips and a skip in his step, in search of Hanzo to deliver the present that was weighing down his front shirt pocket. He’d thought about it this morning while getting ready that Hanzo really deserved his last pack of honey bourbon Backwoods. He couldn’t in good conscious leave a man without smokes, but McCree also figured it’d be a good way to approach the idea of actually being friends. Break the ice for real other than the few conversations they’ve had over liquor.

As McCree approaches the communal area he hears voices and a frown passes over his face as he realizes they’re raised, echoing down the hall. It wasn’t a quiet watchpoint, people argued and fought over stupid shit all the time, but this seemed genuine in a way the yelling usually wasn’t. 

Jesse picks up the pace, a sinking feeling in his stomach as he begins to recognize the voices. 

“You are delusional. He was _not_ the man you believed him to be. He was harsh and unkind and it would do you well to realize the trauma he put you through.” 

“It was _never_ our father. Do not dishonor his memory. He was kind to us, to our mother. He was not like our uncles.” 

“Perhaps not as cruel, but just as manipulative. He groomed you, Hanzo, as much as any of the other elders. I wish you would recognize it.” 

McCree stops in the doorway and tries not to intrude, knowing the brothers had probably heard him coming down the hall already. If they had they do not acknowledge him. 

Hanzo is on one side of the kitchen island, closest to McCree, gripping the counter tightly. Genji is on the other side, standing back with his arms crossed against his chest. Genji is masked but McCree assumes his expression is similar to Hanzo’s, a deep frown and furrowed brows etched into his skin. 

“I refuse to play along as you demonize our father.”

“What part am I falsifying? He did not allow you to live a life separate from our business, kept you from friends, did not allow you to have a proper childhood. Those things are wrong, Hanzo.” 

“He treated us fairly, provided us with all we needed, did not physically abus-” 

“If that is your criteria for a proper father figure than I am _sorry_ our upbringing has left you believing so. Did mother’s example not leave a lasting impression?” Genji is rubbing at his faceplate, exasperated. 

“Do not bring her into this.” Hanzo snaps.

“Why not? She was loving, patient, kind… if not for her I am afraid our father would not have spared the small kindness he did.” 

“He was not like our uncles!”

“Just because he didn’t beat you or order you to kill me does not make him better!” 

Silence hangs heavy over the room and McCree watches the muscles of Hanzo’s back work under his t-shirt as he breathes. The breaths are ragged, unsteady, and Hanzo moves back, until his back hits the wall.  
“Why do you try to tarnish him as I remember?” 

“Because you’re excusing your abuser, Hanzo. If you cannot understand that you have been hurt since your birth you will never move past it.” 

“Do not victimize me!” Hanzo yells, pressing a hand against his chest, “I have _no_ reason for pity, sympathy. I was not the victim of our family’s chaos, it was you!” He points at his brother, “No father, uncle, cousin, did this to you! It was _me_. Am I not as bad, as unkind? I am just like our father!” 

“Hanzo, that is not-” 

“Is this not what you wanted to hear? If he is a killer, a manipulator, a _demon_ , than I am twice as bad in all ways. Does that make you feel better, Genji?” 

“That’s not what I was trying to say to yo-” 

“Easy, easy. Timeout, both’a’ya. This is spirlin’ out and I can’t watch it much longer.” McCree acts as the referee and marches over, flesh hand settling gently on Hanzo’s lower back. Hanzo gasps, breath catching in his throat as he’s startled from his blustered speech, “Yeah, easy now. We both know Genji wasn’ blamin’ ya. He don’t blame ya.” McCree uses his free hand and slides a smoke out of his chest pocket and passes it to Hanzo, “Breathe fer me and chill out for a sec’.”  
Shockingly, Hanzo follows Jesse’s advice and lights the smoke. There is still the aura in his eyes of a predator about to pounce, if given the opportunity. They’d have to tread carefully.

“Yes, that was not my intention. I just watched from afar, a younger sibling unable to do anything about the expectations placed on my elder. It hurt to see you so easily whisked along by ill-intentions. I apologize for how harshly I came across and that I let my frustrations get the better of me.” Genji bows lowly at the waist and McCree moves his hand in soothing circles. 

“Ain’t uncommon for siblin’s to see different sides of their parents!” McCree agrees, “Different perspectives, people, relationships, totally possible you both felt ya knew the guy in different ways.” 

“What would you know about having siblings?” Hanzo asks on a loud exhale. 

“Well, that is, ya see-” McCree’s tongue feels heavy in his mouth and he locks eyes with Genji for a moment, “-um, that is… I had a sister.” Is what he settles on saying, fingers trembling and twitching at his side. “Grew up with’er so I get the whole ‘favourite parent’ thing. Havin’ different opinions…”

“A sibling I have never heard of before this? How convenient. Tell me, McCree, how you loved this sister you failed to mention when I asked about your family yesterday? Weren't they all dead?”

“My family ain’t none of your business.” McCree says.

“Then remove yourself from this conversation as mine is none of yours _either_.”Hanzo hisses, rising to his full height indignantly, every muscle in his body going taught. 

“ ‘cept it is! Genji’s just as much my family as he is yer’s and if ya ain’t gonna listen to ‘im I’m steppin’ in.” McCree insists.

“This is not a popularity contest. I will not have you arguing about which of you I prefer. You are _both_ my family, my brothers. Please cease this before it gets out of hand.” Genji requests, but it’s clear Hanzo is past being civil as he scoffs. 

“Convenient you replaced our own sibling with mine.” Hanzo observes, “She must not have meant much to you considering she was so easily substituted” 

“Hanzo, that is enough. This has nothing to do with McCree’s sister.” Genji states firmly, but McCree pays him no mind. His gaze his tunnelling, locking on Hanzo. He knows the man is itching for a fight, baiting him into retaliting. It doesn’t help McCree is easily provoked. 

“He seems to think it is. What should I care for a nameless woman when her own brother doesn't even acknowledge her? Shameful.-”

Don't’ rise to the bait. Don’t sink to Hanzo’s level. He doesn’t know what he’s saying- 

“- I may have done unspeakable things, Genji, but at least I cared enough to honor you.” 

McCree’s metal hand curls in the front of Hanzo’s t-shirt and he shoves him back into the wall, “I’ll thank ya kindly to shut yer fuckin’ mouth.” He growls. 

Hanzo, momentarily startled, grasps McCree’s wirst in an effort to put space between them. Jesse doesn’t budge even as he feels electricity flowing up his arm from Hanzo’s skin, watches a spark of blue flickering out the corner of his eye. 

“I suggest you release me.” Hanzo seethes, squeezing so tightly the metal of McCree’s arm creeks. 

“Why? If ya fuckin’ wanna pick a fight so goddamn bad an’ run yer mouth I’ll give ya a fight.” 

“I run my mouth?” Hanzo rolls his eyes, “You never _cease_. No one asked you, McCree.  This was not a matter for your sad familial anecdotes.” 

“Apologize.” McCree grunts and Hanzo frowns. 

“For what?” 

“What’cha said ‘bout my sister. _Apologize_.”

“That you do not honor her? I have seen no proof of it. I will not retract my comment.” 

There’s a shout of protest from Genji as McCree rears back and brings his free first forward. He’s startled as it’s caught and grunts as his fist is crushed beneath strong fingers. 

“I thought we were past throwing fists?!” Hanzo snaps, but doesn’t hesitate as Jesse  releases his shirt to let go of his metal wrist and land a punch against McCree’s gut.

It barely phases the cowboy beyond a slight grunt. Jesse immediately retaliates, raising his prosthetic and landing a punch that makes the bones of Hanzo’s nose _crack_. It has the desired outcome as Hanzo lets him go and Jesse steps back, putting some space between the two.

It doesn’t put him out of the way of Hanzo’s legs though and Hanzo’s right kicks out and catches him in his kneecap. Jesse feels the searing pain from his old injury and buckles forward, falling back into Hanzo’s reach.

A first curls into the thick wool around his shoulders as Hanzo grabs his serape and pulls him forward right into his other fist. There’s a copper taste on his tongue and McCree feels blood dripping over his chin. When he looks up he sees it mirrors the blood sliding over Hanzo’s lips from his nose. 

Jesse finds himself staring, hanging where Hanzo has him held by the serape. An ill feeling rolls through McCree’s gut as he watches purple begins to bloom around the bridge of Hanzo’s nose. Only yesterday they were sitting and sharing a smoke-  
McCree has no more time to reflect as he’s knocked down with a foot to the chest and falls back against the floor

“Hanzo!” Genji’s shout is firm but Hanzo waves him off. 

“You needn’t interrupt. We are almost finished here.” Hanzo says, one knee pressing into McCree’s chest - pinning him to the ground - while one hand still yanks on his serape and makes Jesse lookup. 

The metal of Hanzo’s prosthetic knee digs into his skin and McCree wheezes, trying to grip his leg and move him off.

“Y-You sonuvabitch, get the _fuck_ off’a m-” 

“Quiet. You are listening now.” Hanzo says, pressing his knee down more forcefully until Jesse coughs and can’t speak, “Genji and I are going to disagree. He and I were never able to see eye-to-eye, even before I killed him. You can not run in each time and attempt to play hero. He is _not_ your sister, and whatever you intend to accomplish by protecting him it does not make a difference on your past. No matter how much you wish it did…”  
McCree rolls over as Hanzo releases him, coughing loudly and panting as he gets full use of his lungs back. He breathes, holding back tears that threaten to spill and he barely notices Genji approaching until he feels a cool metal hand in his hair. 

“Was that necessary, Hanzo?” Genji asks.

“I had a point to make.” 

McCree is sure the brothers keep talking but he’s too focused on the gentle fingertips running through his hair, down his neck and over his tense shoulders. It’s in sharp contrast to the stinging of his lips and aching in his chest. None of this had been necessary and McCree knew that, curling into himself and preparing for the wave of shame that was rising up. 

“Hanzo left.” Genji informs him, continuing his soothing ministrations

“... I didn’ mean for that to happen.” Jesse mumbles, eyes unfocused on the floor. 

“No, I did not figure. Hanzo has always been excellent at striking people where it hurts most. Considering his mental state when you arrived and the mention of your sister… I knew it would not end well. You needn’t feel guilty on my behalf.” 

“... is it weird I mostly feel bad cause he an’ I were startin’ to get along? This feels real stupid.” McCree mumbles, a surge of warmth in his chest as Genji laughs. 

“Before we began to argue he said you shared a smoke. I was happy to hear you were both beginning to get along… I do not believe this will end that. You are both stubborn, but you can move past this.”

McCree slowly eases himself up until he’s seated, reaching into the pocket of his shirt

and pulling out the little package of cigarillos. They hadn’t been hurt in the confrontation and he passes them to Genji. 

“Can ya give those to Hanzo? I was bringin’ ‘em out to him.” 

“Of course, Jesse.” Genji assures, delicately taking the gift. 

The two men rise to their feet and Jesse takes a moment, scrubbing over his face with a hand and grimacing as it comes back bloody. 

“Jesse… you do honor your sister.” 

“ Genji, I don’ wanna-” 

“No, you must hear me say this. Hanzo was angry and he does not know. I do. You honor her each and every day by being with Overwatch and saving those who cannot save themselves. It is honorable, and you honor her.”

McCree pulls the brim of his hat down to hide the tears that stream over his face. He can't help the sob that works its way up as Genji pulls him into a gentle embrace.

“How about we go to your room and watch a movie?” He suggests and McCree nods.

“Eastwood?”

“Anything you like, Jess’.”

Jesse is more than grateful as Genji leads him away, thanking his lucky stars he was able to meet a friend like him. A friend who puts up with the worst aspects of Jesse’s character, even if they're unforgivable.

 

\----

 

A soft knock raps against his door and McCree carefully slides out from under the arm that laid over his waist. There's a quiet protest and McCree hushes Genji softly, pulling the blanket back up over his friend as he climbs out of bed. He waits for a moment, watching Genji roll over and begin to breathe deeply once more. Jesse smiles and brushes a few strands of dark hair back from Genji's face before making his way toward the door.

He's careful not to step on his own arm or any of the other metal plating that had been discarded over the floor before they went to sleep last night. He's not successful, stubbing his toe against Genji's faceplate with a hiss.

“ _Fucker.”_ He's sure he makes quite the picture as he opens his door, sporting only one arm that was currently cradling his foot and only wearing his boxers. He’s sort of hopping on one foot to try and keep his balance as he soothes his throbbing big toe.  
That’s when he notices who’s outside and drops his foot back to the ground, mind going from the pain of his toe to the scabbed over split on his lip. 

Hanzo’s face looks pretty bad too, purples and blues decorating his cheeks underneath his eyes. McCree feels his stomach roll.

“Aw hell, Hanzo, did’ja put ice on that? Shit, I’m sor-” 

“You will not beat me to apologies.” Hanzo interrupts, holding up a firm finger and pressing it to Jesse’s lips. “I feel _awful_. Not because of my injury but because of my actions. I came here to apologize and I will not be beat-” Hanzo trails off and peaks around Jesse’s frame and into the bedroom. The next thing he says is in a whisper. “Is he sleeping?” 

“Yeah, he’s real sleepy. Stayed up late watchin’ movies.”

Hanzo is quiet, a slight wrinkle appearing between his eyebrows. “He-” Hanzo licks his lips, “ -has always been a deep sleeper… may I come in to speak? I will be quiet.”

“Hey, you wake yer bro’ that's on you. Probably know as well as I do he's an ornery sonuvobitch when he's sleepy.” McCree steps out of the way to let Hanzo inside, taking a moment to pull a chair from his desk for Hanzo. Jesse takes a careful seat on the edge of his bed and his hand instinctively falls to Genji’s hair and begins petting.

Hanzo’s eyes follow his motions and he’s got that same furrowed look on his face. 

“I know how it looks.” McCree assures, free hand motioning to the scattered bits of clothing and metal around the room, “But it ain’t like that, never been like that.” 

“He said you were like brothers, I do not see any reason he would lie to me about that. It is nice that you are able to comfort one another. However I did not come to speak of your relationship with my brother. It was more about your relationship with… me.”

“ You said somethin’ ‘bout apologies?” 

“Family is-” Hanzo takes a breath, pinches the bridge of his nose on reflex and hisses, hand pulling back, “-complicated. I have never been good with-” He struggling, becoming frustrated with himself. 

“Take yer time, Han’, I ain’t rushin’ ya out.” McCree assures. 

“Well you _should_. The things I said were appalling. I have the unfortunate habit of harshly pushing people away. My mouth runs, words cutting deep like knives. I never realize until it is too late… and by that point we had already come to blows.” 

“... wouldn’t have normally. I really wanted to be past fightin’ with you. Just sorta hit a sore spot. A _real_ sore spot.”

“And I should have realized this. I have been on the other end of people asking me questions about-” Hanzo’s eyes fall to Genji, going soft as he takes in his sleeping brother’s relaxed face. “It was awful and I lashed out at them for it. When you asked me to stop I should have for I know the pain that comes with family.”

“An’ ya didn’t heal your face ‘cause-?” 

“Self-punishment for my actions.” Hanzo says simply. 

McCree sighs and gets up slowly from the bed. He walks over to his closet and pulls out a small biotic field. He sets it on the desk next to Hanzo and the machine begins to glow, surrounding the two with pale yellow light.

McCree watches as the bruising along Hanzo’s cheek fades away and the bridge of his nose straightens back to its normal arch. He can feel the scab on his own lip fade away and Jesse licks his lips. 

“Thank you.” Hanzo whispers, reaching up to feel his nose. This time he does not wince. “You will not let me punish myself will you?” 

“There’s been enough pain fer all of us, I think.” McCree murmurs, reaching out and clicking the biotic field off. Then he moves, slowly, and rests a hand on Hanzo’s shoulder, giving a comforting squeeze. 

They rest in silence, faces eventually turning until their eyes meet. Jesse watches as Hanzo licks his lips, opens his mouth and closes it. Finally he speaks, 

“I will not ask, but I am sorry for your loss, Jesse.” 

McCree swallows thickly, turning his face away and holding his trembling hands behind his back, “That’s mighty appreciated. Don’ ever wanna talk ‘bout her again tho’, alright?” 

“I respect that.” Hanzo assures, rising to his feet. Surprising McCree, he feels a hand gently squeeze his forearm . “Thank you. For the biotic field and for accepting my apology. I wish for us to be civil, if such things are possible. 

McCree chuckles, covering Hanzo’s hand with his own- but then he realizes he doesn’t have his other hand on so he sort of just pats Hanzo’s hand with his stump. “More than civil. I wanna be friends. Did Genji give ya yer gift?” 

Hanzo smiles and pulls a half-pack of Backwoods out of his back pocket, “They are good… though I do not think they will last me until my shipment arrives. I have decided to go into town today, would you join me?” 

“I’d be honored, Hanzo. Jus’ give me a second to-” 

“He’ll need more than a second to get ready. He is a diva.” Genji mumbles, face squished cutely into McCree’s pillow that has a horse on the case. 

“Says sleepin’ beauty over there. Took ya long enough to wake up.” Jesse snorts. 

“It is only because of your kiss and makeup that I am awake now. Good morning, brother. Your face is tolerable to look at now.” Genji yawns, sitting up and lifting his arms over his head. 

“Well yours is -” Hanzo cuts himself off, eyes clearly trailing over Genji’s face and the scars that littered it, “- well-rested. You look content, it is nice to see.” 

“Mmm thank you, brother.” He says warmly and slides out of bed. Genji begins wandering around and picking up different pieces of his plate armour for his legs, arms and face. “I would invite myself along but I promised I would stop fooling around with you both for a day and spend some time with Zenyatta.” 

“What? Does he consider us a distraction?” Hanzo asks, pulling his hand away from Jesse and crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Yes.” Genji snickers, “Though he loves you both greatly, I assure. We would prefer having a quiet day today… and perhaps you both can have one as well while you run your errands.” 

“If Hanzo’ll give me a lil’ bit we’ll get to the runnin’ shortly!” 

“Make sure it is only a little bit.” Hanzo says, frowning as he walks over to the bed and begins to tidy the blankets, “Genji, do not be rude, make the bed.” 

“You think McCree makes his bed?” 

“... you both disgust me.” Hanzo grumbles as Jesse just laughs and leaves the two to their own devices while he goes to have a shower. 

It had been an unexpected way to wake up but not unwanted. The unpleasant feeling that had been sitting in his gut has dissipated and he was ready to start the day fresh.

 

\----

 

“E-Excuse me, sir?” 

“You heard me correctly. Five cartons of Export A green.” Hanzo states, putting his card on the counter. The smoke shop boy nods and ducks into the back hurriedly to retrieve Hanzo’s order. 

“This ain’t that big of an errand. Why were ya so against comin’ into town?” McCree wonders, picking up a pack of cigarillos that’s worth more than half the credits in his account. He’s surprised when Hanzo takes the package from him and rests it on the counter. 

“Excuse me? That ain’t happenin’, Han’. You put those back right-” 

“Money is no object to me. Cease your protests. I do not enjoy being around people. Also I worry that my presence in public will alert someone to Overwatch’s activities. We both have quite the bounty on our heads.”

“Ya ain’t wrong.” McCree agrees, trying to grab the cigarillos off the counter and getting his hand smacked for the effort. “But I ain’t gonna stop livin’ just cause I’m worried someone is gonna try’an shoot me.”

“Do you think I am not living?”

“I think yer startin’ but ya can’t think ya got this livin’ thing down pat, Han’.” 

“I am working on it.” Hanzo agrees, tapping his card on the machine as the boy brings back his cartons in a nice paper bag, tucking the cigarillos inside. Hanzo collects his purchase with a thank you and walks out with Jesse. 

When they are outside Hanzo digs into the bag and passes the cigarillos to Jesse. McCree doesn’t even hesitate despite his previous objections, he takes the package and peels off the plastic to get a smoke out. When he lights it Jesse offers it back to Hanzo.

“You gotta have the first puff.” 

Hanzo rolls his eyes but takes a drag, “... having grown up with money I admit I have fine tastes. I try not to be pretentious about the fact but you simply must try this now.” He insists.

McCree takes a drag and knows what Hanzo means as the smooth, luxurious smoke rolls down his throat. “Growin’ up up with nothin’ means I’ll take what I can get, even if it means pickin’ cigarette butts off the ground and diggin’ the leftover tobacco out. This tho’? This is _awesome_ , and I thank ya kindly to treatin’ me to it.”

“You truly had to do that?” Hanzo could be disgusted but instead he looks sad, clearly guilty for his own wealth.

“Oh ya, clothes dirty and full’a holes, bummin’ smokes, eatin’ bread and butter for dinner. Definitely wasn’t the fancy life yer used to. Is that shirt silk? Are you really wearing’ silk right now?”

Hanzo is laughing, batting Jesse’s hand away where it tries to pick at his rolled up shirt sleeves. 

“Yes, now _cease._ It is smooth and soft against my skin.” 

“So’s cotton.” 

“You are not wrong. I often think of the wealth my family held and the fact that most came from crime. Before I left I drained the accounts into my own and now their legacy is how I fund my life. Using blood-money… it comes with a guilt I was not expecting, even when I use it for my own indulgences that would go against the clan’s wishes.” 

“How do ya deal with that guilt?” 

“Recurring donations to animal and homeless shelters, a bi-weekly delivery to the local food bank in Hanamura, the systematic dismantling of any remaining speck of the Shimada Clan.” 

Hanzo shrugs but McCree stops walking, cigarillo held to his lips, “Don’t just _shrug._ Hell, Hanzo, that’s _awesome_ and I’m real proud of ya for doin’ all that. It means somethin’ even if it doesn’t feel like enough. All those people an’ animals definitely appreciate it.” 

Hanzo turns, staring at Jesse, “T-Thank you.” He stammers, reaching a hand up to rub the back of his neck, “Zenyatta told me of a small cafe that does local sweets - why he knows this I do not know, as he does not eat - would you like to go there? Apparently one of their local delicacies resembles a Japanese _dorayaki_ and I would like to try it.” 

McCree stickers, starting to walk again. Before he passes Hanzo he winks, “You had me at ‘sweets’, Hanzo.”

They end up at a small little cafe, squished into a table in the back corner. They’ve each got a steaming cup of coffee and there’s a plate with cakes sitting in the center of the table. The japonesa were fried donut pastries with a custard cream inside. McCree thought they were alright but Hanzo clearly _loved_ the sweet, easily finishing off the plate on his own. 

Jesse was content sipping at his coffee and people-watching. He clearly stops paying attention because after awhile he realizes he’s the one being watched. 

“I got somethin’ on my face?” 

“You truly are capable of being quiet.” Hanzo observes, smirking as he pops the last bite of japonesa into his mouth. 

“Yer also capable of bein’ funny, who knew?” McCree snickers, nudging his foot against Hanzo’s shin under the table. His smile widens as he feels Hanzo’s foot stick out and nudge his leg back. 

“I am capable of many things that may surprise you.” Hanzo hums, picking up his cup and blowing away the steam. 

“Wanna give a fellow a taste?” 

“You will have to wait and see… I suspect we will be in each other’s company for quite some time, unless something drastic occurs.” 

“Here’s hopin’ nothin’ does cause if it drastic it means it’ll probably be violent which - if it’s anythin’ like the Swiss headquarters - will be real nasty.” 

“Most do not want to speak on that, the end of Overwatch, but clearly it is a part of your story and something we should all be aware of.” 

“It’s what happens when ya try to keep secrets, divide your team into factions, care more ‘bout what the news says ‘bout us then what we’re really doin’ fer the people.” McCree grumbles, tapping his fingers on the table a bit agitated. Not at Hanzo and for his questions but just for the actions of people in the past. 

“But that is not us now.” Hanzo points out, “We are a small group of people who discuss our actions before taking them. We care about the greater good and not what the United Nations or any other organization believes. I think we will be able to do good and we certainly will not turn on one another.”

“I hope more than anythin’ we don’t. I hate losin’ people I care about.” McCree sighs, thinking to the lives he’s lost, the relationship that have been destroyed. From Blackwatch, to Deadlock and his family before. He wanted to keep this new Overwatch safe and it was clear from the resolve in Hanzo’s eyes he wanted the same. 

“Whatever conflict we face we will face it together, Jesse.” 

McCree look down and smiles as he sees a hand on his wrist. He turns his hand until he’s palm-to-palm with Hanzo. 

“Ya tryin’ to reassure me or yourself?” 

“Both of us, for sometimes I believe we both need it despite our confident facades.” 

“Never gonna say no to a little reassurance.” McCree assures, tentatively lacing their fingers together. He doesn’t draw attention to it, just decides to keep talking even when Hanzo’s eyes lock onto their hands. “Were those lil’ donuts close to what you had at home? Sure gobbled ‘em up.” 

“I think I will get a box to go…” Hanzo hums, looking back up from their hands, “ _Dorayaki_ are softer, normally with red bean paste, but these are nice. This whole cafe is pleasant, quiet.”

“Think you’ll go out more now?” 

“I would not go so far.” Hanzo grins, “But perhaps I will again and you can accompany me?” 

“If ya buy me more cigarillos I won’t complain.” McCree jokes and Hanzo grins, squeezing onto his hand tight.

“If you are kind to me I may consider it.” Hanzo assures and McCree flags down the waitress and asks for another plate of japonesa for them. “That is very kind.” 

“Only the best for the man I’m trying to bribe.” That makes Hanzo laugh brightly and he only gets happier as the treats arrive.

McCree eats a few more this time and they take their time in the cafe before heading home, their hands locked together until they get up to leave.

\----

 

“I do not want to hold his hands. They are cold.”

“That is _rude.”_

“Then wear mittens. Why are we doing this outside? It is unseasonably cold.” Hanzo groans and Zenyatta’s laughter trills over the walkways.

“The cold makes our minds alert, Hanzo. If you will not hold Genji's hands then I will but you do need a partner for this exercise.”

“I do not have a partner.” Hanzo mumbles.

“Well ya might.” McCree hums, having been outside to have a smoke when he’d heard the commotion. 

“You have one metal hand.” Hanzo objects, clearly startled when McCree throws his glove at him. 

“Put that on yer right and there won’t be a problem.” McCree snickers, sitting cross-legged in front of Hanzo. “What’re we doin’, Master Zenyatta?” 

“ I will walk the four of us through a partner meditation.” Zenyatta explains, “The chill air and added human touch will make our senses alert and bring forth more comfort and clearer understanding. Are you comfortable?” 

“Yes, Master.” Genji confirms, and there’s agreement from Hanzo and McCree as well. 

“Close your eyes… gently take your partner by the elbows. Slowly slide your fingers down along their forearms until your hands are clasped.” 

McCree closes his eyes and only shifts a little as he feels Hanzo’s hand at his elbow. He can only feel his right arm so he focuses on that, how Hanzo’s fingers trail through his coarse arm hair and finally settle when they are holding hands. 

“Adjust your hands until you have two fingers pressed against your partner’s wrists. Feel their pulse and adjust your breathing to your partner’s heart rate.” 

Hanzo’s pulse is steady and McCree slows his breathing to match it, feeling some of tension leave his shoulders. McCree feels Hanzo searching for his pulse and when Hanzo finds it he begins to relax as well. 

He realizes this part of the exercise must be for them as it would be impossible for Zenyatta and Genji to feel one another’s heart beats. 

“Breathe in, out, feel the life of your partner’s pulse beneath their skin. Lean forward - slowly, we do not want any injuries - until your foreheads touch. You are now connected by two points, your heartbeat and your minds. Feel that life energy between you where you are connected and in this moment you are one being, breathing in time with each other.”

Jesse startles a touch when he feels Hanzo bump against him, making the first move to connect them at their second point. McCree laughs softly and can’t help but nudge their noses. 

“Stop nuzzling me, it is not part of the exercise.” Hanzo whispers. 

“Your nose is cold. I’m helpin’.” McCree whispers back, feeling Hanzo’s face move and he’s pretty sure he’s smiling. 

“Become one as you breathe, two souls falling into relaxation as you breathe and feel one another, one pulse flowing to another pulse. A heartbeat onto another…” 

McCree isn’t much for this meditation stuff but as Zenyatta speaks and he focuses on Hanzo’s body against his own he falls into a trance. Jesse follows each of Zenyatta’s careful instructions, sliding his hands up Hanzo’s arms and holding his biceps. Moving his hands along the thick muscles of Hanzo’s shoulders and feeling Hanzo’s own hands on his shoulders, fingers kneading into Jesse’s flesh. 

McCree didn’t think that Zenyatta instructed that but his soft breath clearly isn’t a protest against Hanzo’s actions. Jesse melts under the fingers, not realizing how tense he’s been. Probably due to the fact he and Hanzo have been fistfighting for the last couple months honestly, so it’s pretty nice the two of them can work together to relieve some of that tension together.

McCree’s careful with his metal hand as he applies pressure to Hanzo’s tense shoulders. He ends up trailing his fingers up the back of Hanzo’s neck and applying pressure at the base of his skull. He grins when he feels Hanzo go slack under his fingertips and continues his gentle ministrations.

“-please open your eyes, holding your partner’s gaze. See the one who has offered you peace at this time.” 

McCree blinks his eyes open and is left breathless as he stares into Hanzo’s focused brown eyes. He’s never really taken the time to appreciate them. Hell, Jesse had never even known they were brown until this moment. 

Jesse feels startled by the intimacy of this, too aware of the fact his hands are delicately cradling Hanzo’s skull. As he begins to pull away he hears a sharp voice instruct him. 

“Do not pull away. Continue your previous actions but now be present in the identity of your partner.” 

“Makin’ me feel self-conscious.” Jesse mumbles under his breath and it has Hanzo laughing softly and nodding. 

“Yes I understand that feeling… I am not judging your features, I assure. Simply watching.” 

“Yeah, guess that’s what we're doin’... watchin’.” Jesse murmurs, beginning the gentle pressing against Hanzo’s neck again. This time he’s able to watch as Hanzo’s mouth falls open slightly and his eyes threaten to flutter shut. It’s clear he’s struggling to stay within the parameters of Zenyatta’s exercise and keep his eyes open. 

Something about it makes Jesse’s stomach flip-flop and it’s real hard not to let a smile spread across his face. He’s never seen Hanzo with an expression like that and wonders what other ones he could make flash across Hanzo’s features if he just-

“Now please release your partner and fold your hands in your lap, closing your eyes and taking a few breaths. When you are ready you may open them and be finished with our session.”

McCree reluctantly pulls his hands back into his lap. He takes five breaths - in, out, in, out - and when he opens his eyes he's staring back into Hanzo’s. He licks his lips, about to speak when Hanzo tilts his head toward their instructor. It seems Zenyatta hadn't quite listened to his own instructions.

The omnic has his forehead pressed to Genji's and he's cradling his head. Genji's breath and the whirring of Zenyatta’s system are in sync but beyond that they are completely still.

Hanzo makes a motion indicating they should leave them be and McCree isn't going to argue that. They slowly rise to their feet and quietly head back inside the base.

Jesse smiles when he notices how red Hanzo's cheeks are in the inside lighting.

“You really were cold, huh?”

“Yes… however I am once again surprised by the effectiveness of Zenyatta's exercises.”

It showed too, the slopes of Hanzo's shoulders were no longer pulled up to his ears in tension.

“Feel like I should get some if the credit for that. I'm the one who gave ya the massage after all.”

The pink of Hanzo's cheek trails up to his ears and Jesse has a feeling it's not just the cold affecting the man's colour.

“Yes, that was-” Hanzo clears his throat and pulls Jesse's glove from his hand to return it to him,  “-enjoyable. What do you do with the other glove when you only wear one?”

“Huh? Oh! Usually keep’em in case  there's a mission where I gotta go undercover. Hide the arm, ya know?”

“I see… I try to meditate with Zenyatta at least once a week. Same time, place, day… it was originally for Genji's sake but I am sure you can see the benefit.”

McCree shrugs, “Sure. When it's somethin’ like that. Not too keen on the sittin’ still in silence thing.”

“You should participate again next week. I'm sure neither will object.” Hanzo offers and McCree finds himself nodding to the suggestion.

“I think I could try it out again if they don’t mind.” 

“I am sure they will not. Genji is always happy for your company.” 

“Are you happy fer it?” McCree asks, slowing down as they approach Hanzo’s room. Hanzo has his hand raised, about to press it to the scanner outside the door. 

“... I am.” Hanzo tells him, pressing his hand down. As the door opens in recognition Hanzo motions for McCree to come inside, “If you’d like. There is no pressure but I thought a drink would warm us up after the terrible cold outside.”

McCree feels his stomach roll, surprised by Hanzo’s offer. Except he doesn’t have to think about his answer because he’s already walking inside Hanzo’s room and taking in the clean surroundings. It was different from his own, less personalized and looking more like the standard dorm room. It makes Jesse to really zero in on the personal touches Hanzo had given the room.

There is a small bonsai on the desk in the corner and across the desk laid paper and pens with Japanese script over some of the pages. On the shelf in the corner there were a few bottles, glasses and packs of cigarettes. These all make sense but what surprises him the most is the soft quilt on the bed, a patchwork of different colours and patterns that was nowhere near the perfection Jesse had to come to expect of Hanzo. The comfort the quilt exuded was also seen in the soft slippers placed neatly next to the bed. 

McCree realizes he’s just been standing in the doorway and staring way too hard at Hanzo’s belongings, so he clears his throat and steps past the threshold, “Yeah, thank ya kindly. Won’t turn down such a kind offer.” McCree isn’t really sure where to situate himself, especially as Hanzo walks in and the door closes behind them. 

McCree watches Hanzo easily navigate the space and take two cups, filling them with liquid from an amber coloured bottle. 

“Whiskey, if that is to your liking?” 

“More than, thank ya.” Jesse takes the cup and glances around for a moment before sitting down on Hanzo’s desk chair. He peers at the paper on the desk but isn’t able to read it. The only words he recognized were Hanzo and Genji’s names so he figured it must have been a journal so he keeps his eyes off it after that. Instead he follows Hanzo, who had slid into his slippers and sat on the edge of his bed. 

Jesse licks his lips, tries real hard not to smile. Hanzo looked just as cozy as that blanket, shoulders relaxed after their little session earlier and clearly settling into the familiarity of his room. 

Then McCree sees Hanzo’s hand twitch around his glass and smiles a touch, raising his eyebrow up, “You got somethin’ on yer mind?”

“Are you this forgiving of everyone?” 

McCree leans back in his chair and shakes his head. No, he’s never been real forgiving, if the way he treated Hanzo at first wasn’t a strong enough indication. “What I am is a good judge’a character. Think we could make real good friends, you an’ I.” McCree means it too, thinking back to the butterflies taking up residence in his belly when they were touching earlier.

“You know I am sorry for how I treated you.”

“You've apologized just about enough, I think.”

Hanzo huffs, shuffling back a bit so he can lean against the wall. “It was not you, not really, but what you represented. Being a better brother to Genji than I could… I will admit I was jealous.”

“It wasn't always sunshine and rainbows with us either, Han’. Also ya don't gotta be jealous. At first I was jus’ worried ‘bout Genji but I've seen your remorse… everythin’ yer doin’ to atone. I want the both of ya to have a relationship together.  Lots of people would give anythin’ to have their family back again and I'm happy fer ya both.” There’s an unspoken statement between the two of them and Jesse is well aware of it. He'd give anything for his sister back.

Hanzo lets out a breath and the smile that crosses his face is small but ultimately genuine, “Then let us move past that and begin associating outside of our relationship with Genji.” He raises his glass a touch into air.

McCree snickers and raises his glass, “A toast to us, Darlin’.”

Hanzo’s cheeks and ears turn that soft pink colour again and Jesse grins wide with all his teeth showing. Hanzo's shyness delighted Jesse in the same way the man's ferociousness excited him. McCree takes a drink and doesn't question how he's beginning to feel… a good courtship always started with a few solid punches he figured. Then he shakes that thought away because _no_ that wasn't healthy at all and he and Hanzo were far past the violence. They were sharing drinks and smiles and it was _good_. McCree never wanted to raise a hand against him again.

“... I know we said we're startin’ a friendship beyond Genji but does that mean you don't wanna hear embarrassin’ stories ‘bout him in Blackwatch?”

“If you don't tell me this instant consider our friendship over before it began.”

McCree chuckles, pulling out a cigarillo and lighting it,  “Alright so we were in Switzerland…”

 

\----

 

“Hey, Han’ I know I‘m a little early but I _gotta_ tell ya ‘bout Genji durin’ practice today, it was _wild_. Man has no fear, tried to get ‘im to tell you himself but he thinks you'll call ‘im reckless. Which ya will. ” McCree’s laughing as the door slides open, having been told before to let himself in if they had a planned meeting. Which was happening more often since their first time in Hanzo’s room.

It was always at Hanzo's because behind that closed door McCree was able to see the man relax in the familiar space. He valued Hanzo feeling comfortable so he never suggested taking their meetings elsewhere. Plus they were able to smoke and drink without people's prying eyes, which they didn't always do anyway but the privacy was nice. Sometimes Hanzo would make them tea and they'd lay off the cancer sticks for a bit (which probably would make Angela happy if she knew).

They kept talk casual, old stories about Genji or interesting jobs they've taken while on the road as mercenaries. Being on the road gave them lots to say about different scenery, foods, and the shittiest hotels they've stayed in.

McCree lives for the moments when he finally runs into Hanzo and gets the invite, which is still sometimes for him to come mediate or train with Genji and Zenyatta, but is more often a private invite to Hanzo's room.

Like today, which had started with finding Hanzo in the kitchen drinking miso out of a mug. Mccree had sauntered over and trailed his fingers up the back of Hanzo’s neck, grinning as the man shuddered beneath him.

_“Got a new bottle’a whiskey this mornin’, care to share her with me tonight?”_

Hanzo had stayed quiet but eventually nodded, pressing his head back into Jesse's touch,

_“Tonight. Closer to ten if that is acceptable.”_

_“Ten? That's real late fer you. What about yer beauty sleep?”_

_“I have some things to attend to today but I would still like to see you this evening.”_

Jesse tangles his fingers in the back of Hanzo's hair, giving his scalp a little squeeze, _“Won't say no to that. See you ‘round ten, Darlin’.”_ Jesse has released him, whistling to himself as he impatiently waits for ten.

It's nine forty-five when he enters Hanzo's room and almost drops his bottle of whiskey. Thankfully he has the wherewithal to actually set the bottle down before he gets to Hanzo, falling to his his knees beside the bed despite how his joints protest at the action.

Hanzo looks shaken in a way McCree's never seen - never thought he would _ever_ see. He's pale, a layer of sweat across his skin making it clammy when McCree feels it, his flesh hand cupping Hanzo's face and looking for what could be causing this. Could be causing the sobs and screams that Hanzo had been desperately holding back since McCree entered the room, even if the tears streaming over his face were a dead give away.

“Han’, Darlin’, Babe, ya gotta tell me what's wrong. Gotta let me know how I can help ya.”

“Y-You were not supposed to be here until _ten_.” Hanzo gasps, squeezing his eyes shut tightly.

“Like you'd have been able to get yerself collected that quickly.”

“ _I would have.”_ Hanzo insists and McCree's heart hurts for him because no, there was no soothing this sort of pain in fifteen minutes.

That's when McCree notices the rigid posture of Hanzo's body and his eyes follow Hanzo's arms down to where the man's hands clutch at his legs. Hanzo isn't wearing his prosthetics and the muscle is spasming.

“Ah shit, alright… ” Carefully, McCree pulls Hanzo at the wrists and tries to get him to let go. When Hanzo's breathing picks up Jesse soothes him, “Gonna replace yer hands with mine. Wrap yer arms around my neck and lay yer head on my shoulder.”

That gets Hanzo to let go and immediately McCree gets his hands on Hanzo's stumps, kneading the tense flesh under his palms. He feels Hanzo move and then there's a face against his shoulder, soft hair brushing his cheek and fingers digging into the back of his shirt.

“I gotcha. Don't gotta worry. Nothin’ fun ‘bout phantom limb pain, but it's okay, Darlin’, yer not really hurt. Jus' the nerves thinkin’ ya are. Jus’ yer mind playin’ tricks.” McCree soothes, speaking quietly into Hanzo's ear as he digs his thumbs into Hanzo's tense flesh, warming it with his hands.

McCree isn't sure, at first, if his ministrations were doing anything as Hanzo continued to heave against his shoulder and still cling tight to his back. But after what feels like an eternity Hanzo's breathing begins to slow and he releases Jesse, falling back until he laid against the bed and threw an arm over his face to hide his shame.

McCree smiles sadly, knowing Hanzo likely never had someone to care for him which meant he'd gone through this alone many times. He notices the - honestly pretty ugly - quilt folded at the end of the bed and takes it, carefully swaddling Hanzo's legs in the soft fabric. Before covering them up Jesse takes a second to press a kiss to each of the stumps, grinning against the skin when he feels Hanzo jump in surprise. You have to kiss someone when you tuck them in, especially when it helps replace a bad feeling with a good one. Jesse strokes his hands up Hanzo’s quilt covered thighs once more before moving up the bed until he can lay down next to Hanzo.

Jesse stays quiet for a moment, listening to the evenness of Hanzo’ breath before he speaks, “Been there before… start thinkin’ ‘bout how you lost ‘em and then it starts aching and before you know it’s like the wound is fresh.” He lifts his arm up over his head and stares at the lights, wires, and where it hugs around his flesh. With the arm on you can still see scars and the very edge of an old tattoo, all that remained of the piece. 

Jesse startles as a hand reaches out and runs over the scars just at the edge of his prosthetic. He turns a bit onto his side and sees that Hanzo has uncovered his face and was staring at the scars where his fingers traced them. McCree was tempted to get up and get a washcloth so he could wipe the tear tracks from Hanzo’s cheeks but he doesn’t dare disturb him. 

“...how did it happen?” 

“A mission, shoulda’ been easy,  don’t remember much. Lots of screaming, fire, whole place fallin’ down. I remember shoutin’ for Genji then a beam fell and pinned my arm down. Everythin’s a blur after that. Think Gabe or Genji drug me out but no one ever said...” McCree huffs, thinking about reaching into his pocket for a smoke but decides against it. He can handle this and be the strong one for Hanzo, “Lost a lotta good people in that one. Also when things started to really go down hill with Overwatch ...and hell, practically the only home I’d ever really known. Everythin’ fell apart after that and thinkin’ ‘bout it makes it hurt.” 

“I see your fingers twitch sometimes.” Hanzo whispers and McCree nods, lifting up his flesh hand for Hanzo to inspect too. 

“Yeah, a little bit of trigger finger and probably a lot of PTSD, but I still got steady hands so you ain’t gotta worry.”

“I do worry.” Hanzo licks his lips and rolls onto his side until they’re both facing one another, “I lost my legs during my fight with Genji. He _fought_ , Jesse, with all his strength he fought me and I still-” Hanzo’s lip trembles and McCree reaches out, strokes his thumb over Hanzo’s trembling lip. Hanzo huffs, smiling sadly against the digit, “His last action was to irreparably sever my tendons. After the battle I woke in the infirmary and my legs were gone and already replaced with prosthetics. It burned as I ran, killed our uncle, I pushed through pain unimaginable-” Hanzo’s breathing begins to pick up again and McCree holds his face steady until their eyes meet and Hanzo focuses. 

“You don’t gotta say anymore. I don’t need to kno-” 

“It _hurts_. He did this and yet- _how?_ How could I ever tell him how this hurts? This is just punishment for my actions and yet-” Hanzo chokes on his words and squeezes his eyes shut tight against the onslaught of tears.  
Jesse reaches out, hesitantly at first, before throwing all caution away and bundling Hanzo up against his chest.

“Yer allowed to be upset an’ hurt by this. You were both part of that fight, Darlin’, don’t matter who won.”  

“It _does!_ How can you think otherwise when you see him!? My pain does not matter in the face of my actions!” Hanzo cries the words against Jesse’s shoulder and Jesse just rubs his back with firm hands. 

“It does matter and he knows.” Jesse murmurs, mouth close to Hanzo’s ear, “He forgives you and I know you know he’s remorseful. For your legs, for everythin’... bottlin’ this up and punishin’ yerself with it ain’t no different from not healin’ yer broken nose after our fight. It don’t make things better it just causes more pain. Genji wouldn’t wanna see you in pain and I sure as hell know he’d apologize to you _genuinely_ for what he did.” 

“B-But I don’t deser-”

“You don’t think you deserve nothin’ so your opinion don’t matter here.” McCree states, “You’re upset but you don’t want to be apologized to. You don’t wanna be forgiven.” 

“Jesse, you do not understand-” 

“Maybe not but’cha know I’m right. You’re allowed to hurt, Hanzo.” McCree lets one arm trail down until he can grip onto the meat of Hanzo’s thigh over the blanket, “An’ I know you do real bad so I wanna help. You gotta talk to Genji ‘bout this.” 

Hanzo sniffles and presses his face closer into Jesse’s neck, curls his legs up so they’re more easily touched. Jesse gets the message and continues stroking his hand up and down the length of Hanzo’s thighs wherever he can reach. Eventually his hand comes to settle on Hanzo’s hip and he whispers, “You know he’d feel terrible if he knew it hurt ya like this…” 

“The exact reason I do not want to tell him the extent.” Hanzo murmurs, “He deserves to be happy and not feel even a fraction of the guilt that I do.” 

“But if ya really wanna both get better ya can’t have this sort of secret.”

“I hate how reasonable you can be.” Hanzo grumbles and Jesse laughs, shaking the whole bed and Hanzo with it. 

McCree’s laughter settles and he begins moving his hand over Hanzo’s thighs again, soothing with his actions but without words. He doesn’t have anything else to say and knows that Hanzo has enough to think about, enough feelings to sort through. Which is why he’s surprised when he hears Hanzo’s exhausted voice near his ear. 

“... I need to shower the sweat and poor feelings away but - I hope it is not too much to ask - would you consider being here when I get back?” 

“Only gonna take me two second to go get somethin’ more comfortable to wear and I’ll be right here… all night?” 

“Yes. That is what I meant.” Hanzo confirms. He pulls back and McCree does the same, giving Hanzo room to sit himself up on the edge of the bed. 

McCree moves into action then, getting to his feet and finding Hanzo’s prosthetics before the man can even attempt to himself. He kneels down by the bed again - knowing he’s going to be paying for it tomorrow but doesn’t care - and carefully unwraps the blanket from Hanzo’s legs He rests it on the bed out of the way and turns his focus to the flesh of Hanzo’s thighs. 

“I can leave you to do this yerself?” McCree offers, not sure if he’s overstepping. When he looks up he sees that Hanzo is watching him, a blush caressing his cheeks. 

“You are fine. Continue.” 

That’s all the goahead McCree needs so he picks up Hanzo’s right thigh, carefully cradling the stump in his hands. He gives each one special attention, kneading the skin and daring to press a kiss to each of them before lining up Hanzo’s prosthetics and letting the pressure seals lock into place. He smiles as he sees the lights at the bottom of the feet shine blue and Hanzo rises to his feet. 

McCree looks up at the man from his position on the floor and he’s sure he looks smitten. He’s just so proud of Hanzo for getting back up onto his feet after that - figuratively and literally.

Jesse is grateful when Hanzo offers him a hand and he groans a bit when he gets to his feet, keeping ahold of Hanzo’s hand even when he’s back on his feet. 

“You shower and I’ll met ya back here in twenty? Stop by the kitchen and brew ya up a pot of tea?” 

“It would be appreciated.” Hanzo nods. He seems contemplative and McCree only understands why when Hanzo leans forward and just barely brushes his lips against Jesse’s cheek. “Thank you. I will see you in a bit.” He says quickly before fleeing out of the room. 

Jesse raises a hand to his cheek and swallows as a whole colony of butterflies hatch in his belly, “Huh, what’d’ya know…” 

\----

 

McCree knows he’s like Hanzo when it comes to what he believes he deserves. Quite frankly Jesse McCree doesn’t feel like he deserves _shit,_ but hell does he ever want. He wants good drinks, smokes, friends, company, the coziest pajamas ever because he has a feeling Hanzo is gonna snuggle up against his chest tonight, and _god_ if that doesn’t make him feel excited.  
As McCree pulls on his flannel jammies he thinks about what he deserves, if he can even begin to allow himself to take anything from Hanzo. It feels wrong to drag someone else into his mess just to have them find out all his faults and then leave. 

But if anyone could understand his faults it would be Hanzo Shimada… McCree stares at himself in his mirror as he does up one of the last buttons on his sleep shirt. 

“You were throwin’ hands not that long ago and now you feel like he’s lit a fire in yer heart. Fuckin’ sap, Jesse McCree. Can’t take ya anywhere.” Jesse scolds himself, rubbing a hand over his chest to try to dispel some of the warmth settling there, “Damn it.”

He leaves his room in sock feet and heads toward the kitchen to brew that pot of tea. According to his phone he’s got about fifteen minutes before he needs to be back in Hanzo’s room and doesn’t plan to keep him waiting, afraid to leave Hanzo alone when he was still experiencing pain and vulnerability. 

“It’s those damn eyes.” Jesse’s mumbles  to himself as he enters the kitchen. Each time they caught each other’s eyes McCree felt swallowed up in the depth of Hanzo’s gaze. 

McCree pulls down Hanzo’s tea from the cabinet and puts the kettle on to boil. He then grabs Hanzo’s small teapot and rests it on a travel tray with two mugs. He’s tapping his foot impatiently as he waits for the water to boil, thinking of what may happen when he returns to Hanzo’s room.

Jesse didn’t have any ulterior motives, he genuinely just wanted to provide Hanzo some comfort, but if he got a few shy kisses in return… 

“I do not know what to make of this. Pajamas, my brother’s tea, a dumbass smile on your face. I would think you are smitten but _surely_ that could not be it.” Genji teased, jumping up on the counter next to McCree. 

Jesse startles and finds himself face-to-face with Genji, the man’s faceplate off, “I don’t really got much time to talk, Gen-” 

“I do not care if you are sleeping with him, as shocking as the transition would be. You may do each other goo-” 

“He had phantom limb pains. He needed some comfort and asked me to stay with him so I’m tryin’ to get ‘im a warm drink while he gets ready for bed.” As much as the suggestion excites McCree he doesn’t want to send the wrong message. 

Genji’s face falls, a look of guilt and unsurety crossing his features, “Did he tell you about-?” 

“Hey now, don’t look like that. I don’t know if I can handle comfortin’ two brothers tonight.” McCree soothes, taking hold of Genji’s hand and squeezing, “He told me. He… it ain’t really my place to say, Sweetheart.” 

“But he is angry with me, hurt by my actions. He lost his legs and he acts like it is no big deal because he did this to me.” Genji motions to his body with his free hand, “I have never had the chance to apologize because he’s so set in his own guilt… and yet I do have mine. My own shame burns brightly.” 

“That sounds ‘bout right… ya’ll need to talk. I won’t be yer inbetween, that won’t solve nothin’. Don’t know if tomorrow would be too soon but eventually you gotta talk.” 

Genji hops down from the counter and rubs a hand over his face, “You are right. We are a mess, aren’t we?” 

“Yeah, but yer both real cute.” Jesse teases, leaning down to press a kiss to Genji’s forehead, “I don’t wanna leave ya here sad. Where ya headed next?” 

“I was passing by on my way to Zenyatta’s room. You needn’t worry, I will find comfort there. Though I appreciate your concern, lovely cowboy.” Genji grins, taking step back, “Look after him, Jess’.” 

McCree goes to tilt his hat and huffs a laugh when he realizes he left it in his room, “Will do, Sweetheart. Go have fun with yer monk.” 

Genji chuckles and heads toward the door. He stops for a moment to blow Jesse a kiss before he disappears. McCree makes a show of catching the kiss and tucking it into his pocket.

“Oh you two-” He shakes his head and gathers up Hanzo’s tea as the kettle begins to whistle.

When he gets back to Hanzo’s room the man is already there, dressed in a simple robe and sitting on the edge of the bed. His damp hair is down and falling over his shoulders and hadn’t taken his legs off yet, seeming to be waiting. McCree moves into gear then, resting the tea tray on Hanzo’s desk. He takes a moment to pour the man a cup and pass it to him before kneeling beside the bed again. 

“You drink that, I’ll handle this.” 

“Thank you.” Hanzo murmurs, looking down with the cup held carefully between his hands. 

McCree releases the pressure latch on each of the limbs and rests them to the side. He figures it’ll be awhile before Hanzo finishes his tea so he takes his time, giving each of the limbs a proper massage this time. Now his actions are fueled by want and not the panic of trying to soothe Hanzo’s pain.

McCree takes the time to explore Hanzo’s scars. They may have been surgical but Hanzo forcing himself to walk on on his prosthetic immediately after amputation had caused them to heal anything but straight. Removing limbs that were useless and replacing them with something ‘better’... McCree thinks a lot of Hanzo’s pain probably doesn’t have to do with Genji but his treatment afterward, and how he had been forced to push himself.

Jesse doesn’t voice any of this because it isn’t his place right now to make Hanzo talk. He’s here to give him reassurance and affection that the man’s probably never had. 

“You are good at this.” Hanzo mumbles against the rim of his cup, watching as Jesse digs his thumbs into the flesh on his thigh. 

“I’m no specialist. Jus’ like givin’ massages, I got big enough hands for it.” 

“ You do.” Hanzo agrees and that beautiful pink comes across his face again. 

McCree chuckles and looks back down at his hands. That’s when he feels something touch his hair and his eyes dart back up. Hanzo has rested his empty mug down and was now gently stroking fingers through his hair.  
Jesse licks his lip, tries really hard not to smile, “Ya know, jus’ cause I’m real affectionate doesn’t mean ya gotta be back if ya aint’ comfortable.” 

“I am comfortable.” Hanzo assures, “Do you… I am confused.” he admits. 

“Do I what, Darlin’?” McCree asks, leaning in and brushing is lips against Hanzo’s skin. 

“ _That_ , with everyone?” 

Jesse shrugs and moves over to kiss the other leg, “Nah. Just people I’m real comfortable with. Ran into Genji in the kitchen and kissed his forehead. Ana and Fareeha’s cheeks sometimes too, but they’re family.”

“I kissed your cheek.” Hanzo states and McCree bites his lip so he doesn’t snort. 

“You did.” He agrees. 

“I do not consider you family.” 

“And you don’t casually give out affection.” McCree points out.

“I do not.” Hanzo agrees. 

A silence falls over them that Jesse isn’t sure how to break. He doesn’t want to push Hanzo into saying anything he isn’t ready for but he’s also really impatient. That’s why it surprises him when Hanzo breaks the silence first. 

“I have been cruel to you but I have been trying to make up for that. While doing so I find that I-” Hanzo licks his lips, “You are a very kind man, Jesse.” 

Jesse’s never wished more than now that he had his hat. He was right, it was Hanzo’s eyes doing this to him. Just catching them and seeing any amount of the honesty Hanzo was displaying was too much for his poor romantic heart. 

“You like me.” McCree murmurs and loves the feeling saying it gives him. His insides are rolling like a damn ocean. 

“I do… I appreciate you and all you have done for me.” Hanzo whispers, sliding his hands out of McCree’s hair until they cup the sides of his face and brush his beard. McCree feels his fingers twitch slightly and grins, turning his head until he can press a kiss to the inside of Hanzo’s palm. 

“You ain’t gotta be so nervous. You’ve been givin’ me butterflies for weeks.” 

“Oh.” Hanzo breathes and Jesse chuckles, rising to his feet. Hanzo’s hands fall away from his face and fall down at his side. McCree picks up that ugly ass quilt again and motions for Hanzo to lay back. 

“I’m tuckin’ ya in, then I’m gonna crawl in with ya. If that’s what’cha wanted?” 

Hanzo doesn’t say anything, just lays back and nods his head a little. McCree pulls up the standard issue blankets over Hanzo’s body and then carefully lays the quilt over top of him. He kicks off his socks and pulls the blankets up, crawling in under them. 

“So I gotta ask-” 

“It is hideous, I know.” Hanzo chuckles and Jesse laughs brightly, pulling Hanzo in against his chest. Hanzo snuggles against him easily until his head is rested on Jesse’s shoulder. “When I left Shimada castle I did not have anything. I slept in an alley the first night and almost froze. I had never been in a thrift store before… this was the only blanket they had. It was ugly but it was warm and kept me alive, I am sure. Whoever made it had terrible taste in colour and pattern.”

“But it’s yours.” 

“First thing that really was just mine. I am quite fond.” 

“Then I can tolerate it… does that panel have cartoon shrimp on it?” 

“Did you see the one with the trees with faces?” 

“No? I see bald turtles tho’, ‘cept they look real weird.”

Hanzo laughs warmly against Jesse's shoulder, “Kappas. Water imps. They will either be civil or consume your flesh.” 

“Oh, love seein’ that before I sleep. Real comfortin’. That the sort of bedtime story you were told as a kid?”

“Nothing so foolish.” Hanzo says, “I was told stories of business successes by my father.” 

“Oh, that sounds fun. Real relaxin’.” 

Hanzo hums, “Do you know better stories?” 

“Darlin’ do I _ever_. My Pa’ used to tell me this one. There was an outlaw in the town of Agua Fria by the name of Texas Red. Many tried to take him, and well, that many men were dead-” 

When McCree finishes his story Hanzo is gently snoring against his shoulder, “Told ya I knew good stories… or good ol’ country songs.” He whispers, kissing Hanzo’s forehead before falling asleep himself.

 

\----

 

McCree grunts as he feels a body press up against his back. He doesn’t bother opening his eyes, just trails his hand up the metal arm around his waist and knows who it is, “Yer interruptin’ my nap, Genji.” He grumbles, but is well on his way to simply falling back asleep. 

He makes a noise of complaint as another body flops into the bed at his front, hugging him around his chest. 

“Now this is just gettin’ ridiculous.” McCree looks down and sees the top of Hanzo’s head, the man’s face buried against his shoulder. When neither of them respond he lets out a little breath, one hand rubbing Hanzo’s back and the other stroking down Genji’s arm. 

“I ain’t gonna kick either of ya out.” 

“He apologized.” Hanzo mumbles and it clicks for McCree. The brothers must have talked. 

“I understood the guilt Hanzo felt but I did not know his own pain, the betrayal he felt. I am extremely sorry for my part in our story. Back then… I was just a victim.” 

“You _are_ the victim.” Hanzo grumbles.

“ _But_ I also inflicted pain. I am sorry for my actions.” 

“And I accept your apology, _Otouto_.” Hanzo whispers.

“Thank you, _Aniki.”_ _  
_

McCree tightens the hold on Genji’s arm and the grip around Hanzo’s waist, “I’m real proud of you. Didn’t think you’d talk so soon. It’s only been-” 

“It has been a month.” Hanzo states and McCree blinks. Had it been that long? The last month had been a whirlwind for Jesse who had found himself constantly in Hanzo’s company. 

They’d gone on their first ‘date’ - at least Jesse considered it a date, he hadn’t really asked - to a restaurant in town that served local seafood. Hanzo had come wearing this royal blue button up that left Jesse breathless for the entire meal. It had to have been illegal for a man to look so good. He’s was sure he looked second rate compared to Hanzo in his own burgundy shirt but by the way Hanzo had been looking back at him… maybe Jesse had been wrong.  
They’d gone out a few other times, back to that cafe for treats and to the same smoke shop where Hanzo would spoil him rotten. At this rate McCree would start to get finer tastes and wouldn’t be able to go back to the tar he was smoking before. 

Apparently McCree’s mind had gone on a bit of a tangent because he feels a finger poked into his ribs. When he looks down Hanzo is wearing an expression that says ‘pay attention to me, fool’. Jesse chuckles and nods, “Yeah, guess it has been a month, huh sweetheart?” 

“Yes… it has been an enjoyable time.” 

McCree grins and leans down, pressing his lips to Hanzo’s forehead, “I’ve been pretty fond of it.” 

There’s quiet laughter against the back of McCree’s neck and he tries to turn to look at Genji but Hanzo holds him tightly in place. 

“What’cha laughin’ at?” 

“It was not a mocking laugh. It was a happy one.” Genji assures, “Seeing you both now and watching the bravery my brother displayed while expressing himself today, I have never been more relieved. You are _happy_. That is all I could have ever asked for.” 

“Even if is with your best friend?” Hanzo asks carefully, and McCree can hear the worry in his voice. Jesse knew that if Genji told Hanzo to stay away from him he would. Hanzo was here to make amends first and make personal connections second. Hanzo would do anything on his path of redemption, even if it meant separating himself from someone who made him happy. 

“Even so. He is a good man, as are you. I told McCree already I have no qualms. I would not be angered for something so foolish.” 

Hanzo nods a touch and buries his face back against Jesse’s chest. 

“That is all I wished to tell you, Jess’. I will leave you both now to-” Genji goes to pull away and Jesse holds tight to his arm. 

“Now, now. You interrupted my nap. Means you gotta stay an’ snuggle. Then the three of us are gonna get food.” Jesse informs

There’s a pause before Jesse feels Genji’s weight against his back once again, “I will accept that.” 

McCree hums and closes his eyes, smiling wide as he hears Hanzo quietly whisper, “Thank you, Jesse.” 

He doesn’t respond, just hugs Hanzo closer and drifts back off to his nap, more relaxed than he had been before his visitors had shown up.

  
\----  
  
“I got shot there when I was fifteen.” McCree points to the puckered scar on his left side. Hanzo reaches out runs his fingers over the skin, grinning as Jesse shivers. “Yer hands are cold.” 

“Why did you get shot?” 

“ I killed four Deadlock men when they pissed me off.” McCree grunts, “That’s all they managed before I whipped out my first Deadeye.” 

“The very first… I was meaning to ask you how it came to be. Is it genetic?” 

“I couldn’t answer that for ya. Mercy’s tried to find out more but in the end she sorta compares it to yer dragons. A spiritual thing that don’t really have a real answer. It was… well, it was just about when I joined Deadlock. Stressful time, as you can guess.

Then those guy’s pushed me and bam. Been able to call it up ever since.” 

“It is a valuable skill… and this one?” Hanzo runs his finger along the thin knife wound that ran up Jesse’s left bicep. 

“Oh, that one was Genji!” 

Hanzo’s eyes widen and Jesse laughs, “First time we trained together I was a lil’ cocky. He threw a knife at me.” 

“... you cannot keep your mouth shut, can you?” Hanzo huffs, exasperated. 

“I’m a lil’ bit of an ass. Didn’t’cha know that?” 

“ I was tempted to shoot an arrow at you more than once.” Hanzo agrees, running his fingers over the lines under Jesse’s pecs. He doesn’t ask but McCree tells him anyway.

“Got those when I got to Blackwatch.” Jesse says, reaching up to touch the familiar scars with fondness, “Gabe was the best. Got us everythin’ we needed. Physically, emotionally… made sure me an’ Genji were always happy, even if we were the biggest pain in the ass.” 

“ I cannot imagine you and a younger Genji in league with one another. Truly a nightmare.” 

“We really were. Hey, you got three answers, it’s my turn. That one!” Jesse pokes the little bullet wound on Hanzo’s right shoulder. 

“My first job as a mercenary. My mind was elsewhere and I was clumsy, allowed my own mark to sneak up on me.” 

“Oh, we all been there.” Jesse abandons his cross-legged position on the bed in favour of laying down on his stomach, “Check out my fuckin’ back, Darlin’.” 

Hanzo audibly gasps and begins running his fingers over McCree’s hairy back. McCree is sure he’s seeing the array of knife wounds and gunshots that marred his back. He’d been caught with his guard down many times and paid the price for it. Some were as old as his days in Blackwatch and some were as new as the ReCall. Jesse knew he had a lucky streak of getting away, not always unscathed, but alive. 

“Do any of these hurt?” Hanzo whispers and McCree shakes his head against the bed. 

“Nah, but yer concern warms my heart, lovely.” McCree jumps a touch when he feels something wet against his back. He realizes Hanzo is giving each of his wounds a small peck and chuckles, “Heh, I said they didn’ hurt, Han’... but don’t stop.”

“I was not planning to.” Hanzo chuckles. 

Eventually McCree feels lips up against his shoulders near his neck and smirks. He’s well aware he doesn’t have any scars on that part of his body. Jesse keeps his eyes shut and tries hard not to smile as the kisses continue up his neck and to his cheek. That's where they stop and McCree knows it's because there's only one place left to go.

Jesse slowly turns his head, giving Hanzo lots of time to pull away.

He doesn't.

Jesse feels the scrape of their beards first and then feels the delicate slide of Hanzo's lips over his own. Hanzo's breath catches and then comes out in a shudder against Jesse's lips. McCree can't help but softly chuckle and raise a hand to brush against Hanzo’s cheek.

“Easy now… you alright?”

“Yes.” Hanzo breathes, pressing his forehead against Jesse's, “I thought you once said you felt you did not deserve something like this....?”

“Could'a sworn you said the same.” Jesse reminds.

“You have a way of changing my opinion on things.” McCree is pleasantly surprised to feel Hanzo kiss him again, another slight press of lips before he pulls back. This close McCree can see a slight pale dot on either side of Hanzo's nose. He presses a finger to one of the dots and grins as Hanzo freezes up

“Lemme guess. Chicken pox?” Hanzo mumbles something inaudible and McCree grins, “What was that?”

“I said it was a bridge piercing.” Hanzo grunts and McCree is certain he's got hearts in his eyes.  

“Oh Darlin’, why'd ya go an’ get rid of that now? Bet you looked real fine with it.”

“My only act of teenage rebellion. I only had it for a day before my father forced me to remove it… I liked it.” Hanzo says quietly and McCree brushes the scars again.

“Well that's the thing ‘bout bein’ an adult. You get to do whatever body mods ya want.”

A flicker of realization passes over Hanzo’s face and he licks his lips. “You are correct.”

“Should I expect you to look different the next time I see ya?”

“Perhaps not the next time considering that will be when we wake in the morning.” Hanzo lays down on his side next to McCree and Jesse grins, slinging his arm around Hanzo’s waist.

“Yer stayin’?” He knows he sounds like an excited puppy but he doesn't care, especially since his enthusiasm wins him a kiss. This one is slower than the last, their lips pressed together for an amazing moment that has Jesse's heart beating fast.

“Yes.” Hanzo murmurs against his lips, drawing out the moment before he settles back against Jesse’s sheets, pulling one of the soft blankets up around his shoulders. Jesse shifts in closer until Hanzo’s head rests on his shoulder and both his arms are around the man. 

“... bet I could look at’cha for hours and keep seein’ somethin’ new.” Jesse whispers as Athena slowly dims the lights. 

“I hope you will find the opportunity to… and that you continue to find good things.” Hanzo whispers and Jesse feels a spike of fondness rush through him. He’s seen the worst of Hanzo, from what he’s done to what he’s capable of doing. Jesse suspects from now on he’ll only see the good in Hanzo and wants to be there for every good step the man makes. 

“Only good things, sweetpea.” Jesse murmurs. He just hopes that Hanzo will only have to see the good in him, that the bad parts never leak out and contaminate this sweetness.

  


\----

  


Jesse’s life has been full of good days. Some of them date before the ReCall but he thinks most of then have been after it. There's a sense of peace and reassurance that comes with having a roof over his head and a schedule to follow. Missions are still few and far between but the ones they’ve gone on have been executed flawlessly. The confidence from the missions just added to the peace he was cultivating for himself.

Even during someone's happiest times the darkness can still seep in. McCree's experienced it countless times but it never makes it any easier. He'd been doing so well, allowing himself to truly believe the happiness he was experiencing with Hanzo would stay. Even feelings so pure as the ones Hanzo makes him feel couldn't crush the guilt that took hold of Jesse.

McCree tries to crush it beneath cigarillos and the fifth of whiskey he keeps under his bed for just such an occasion. Nothing can quell the feelings that have him retching in his toilet and leaving fist-shaped dents in the bathroom wall.

He's heard a few careful knocks on his door but none of the people with clearance had allowed themselves in. McCree is sure the energy radiating from the room is as toxic and heavy as he feels.

He's gotten to the point where he's… not settled, but no longer has the energy to get up from his bed and lash out against unsuspecting concrete walls. His eyes are dry and painful as tears keep trying to push their way up. McCree wants to tell them he's had enough, he doesn't want to cry anymore.

He doesn't want to feel anything anymore.

Jesse hears his door slide open and throws an arm over his face. He doesn't mean to be short but he knows his greeting doesn't come out nicely.

“What'd'ya want?”

“I brought you dinner.” Hanzo says softly. McCree hears the tray being set on his desk and Hanzo shuffling around the room. He realizes Hanzo is picking up the mess he's made, from the empty bottle to countless cigar butts.

Eventually Jesse feels the bed dip as Hanzo sits on the edge. He makes no movements and Jesse does not acknowledge him. Until he feels Hanzo carefully take hold of his flesh hand and begin playing with his fingers.

McCree sighs and pulls his arm back from his face reluctantly. He’s met with an unexpected sight that momentarily pulls him from his own head, “ _Oh,_ you look real good, Darlin’. I love it. _Damn.”_

Hanzo has a soft looking undercut and a black barbell across the bridge of his nose. He smiles shyly and reaches up to to rub at the back of his head, “I took your words to heart, Jesse. I am able to do whatever I please and am slowly accepting it.” 

Jesse feels his heart ache because Hanzo is so _good_. He’s been doing everything to become a better person and overcome the guilt and pain he’s felt. Hanzo was rebuilding a relationship where McCre would never have a chance to. He deserved better.  
McCree feels tears spring to his eyes again and he squints against the pain in his tired eyes. 

“Jesse…?” 

“... I ain’t good, Sweetheart.” 

Hanzo smiles sadly and reaches over to wipe his sleeve across Jesse’s cheek, wiping away a few of the tears. 

“You are one of the best men I have ever met.” Hanzo assures, “But you do not look well. What can I do for you?” 

“No, that’s not what I meant. Right now don’t matter. I mean… I’m a _bad_ person. You shouldn’t come in here pitying me I ain’t even deservin’ of that.” 

Hanzo’s face screws up and he looks unimpressed by Jesse’s statement, “You know what I have done. There are few things worse than that and I do not believe you to be capable of such things. You are a _good_ man, Jesse McCree.”

“You don’t know what the fuck yer talkin’ about.” Jesse grunts, sitting up on the bed and pulling his hand back from Hanzo.

Hanzo scoffs, “I do. I have experienced your kindness first hand and I have yet to meet a person who speaks ill of you. Do not let your self-loathing cloud the truth that you are good.” 

Jesse feels his fingers trembling and grips onto his flesh hand with his metal one, willing the tremors to stop. 

“You don’t know. If I told you you wouldn’t be thinkin’ so highly of me.” 

“Tell me then. I killed my own brother. What could be as bad?”

The tremors begin to shake McCree's entire body as he can't help how the tidal wave of feelings overcome him. He curls in on himself and sobs like he's been shot. The same way _she_ had sobbed.

Hanzo's voice is distant, unable to punch through the fog of self-hatred occupying Jesse's mind. _You don't deserve him or anything else good. Wallow in your shit until you try to kill yourself again. You killed her, McCree. She's dead because of you._

“Jesse.” Firm and warm, right in his ear, “Can I touch you?”

Jesse must nod because Hanzo is holding his hand, telling him to squeeze as they count down from ten. McCree repeats each number and punctuates it with a squeeze. When they reach one he slumps against Hanzo’s chest and shakes as he's rocked.

“Tell me, Jesse. I will not leave you. Let me carry some of your weight.”

Jesse clings to Hanzo tightly, hoping his admission will not push him away as it spills out of him.

“She was only _ten_ , Hanzo. Just a fuckin’ kid and I shot her and left her in the desert to bleed out. _Fuck,_ I can still hear her cryin’ it never goes away, it never _stops._ ”

“Your sister.” It's not a question.

“My baby sister, _mi hermana pequeña, oh Dios, no puedo creer que yo-”_ McCree loses the ability to speak as sobs overtake him once more and he presses into Hanzo, hoping the world would swallow him up. But the only thing that surrounds him is Hanzo’s arms as he rocks Jesse through this.

 

\----

 

_“You /promised/.” Genji hisses, pulling the mask from his face, revealing wounds yet healed._ _  
_

_McCree finds himself turning away, even if he’s lending an ear to the conversation, he doesn’t want to see the gore of his new partner’s face. Despite having had Genji on their force for the past few months he’s yet to learn anything about the man and is keen to listen in._ _  
_

_“Sucks. Blackwatch is removing operations from Hanamura. We’re not going back so you’ll have to get over it, kid. It’s probably for the best.” Reyes huffs, picking up the paperwork and shuffling it neatly into a pile._ _  
_

_“That’s it?” Genji asks, rising to his feet. Unlike McCree, Reyes doesn’t flinch when the Cyborg’s eye flash red. Who decided to give him that feature anyway?_ _  
_

_“That’s it. Better put your revenge plans on hold… for what it’s worth, I am sorry.”_ _  
_

_“It is worth /nothing/.” Genji snarls, knocking his chair back against the wall and stomping out of the room._ _  
_

_McCree raises an eyebrow, motions to the door where Genji had exited._ _  
_

_“Go ahead, Jess. He may need someone to talk to.”_ _  
_

_“Not gonna miss an opportunity to be nosy.” Jesse smirks, missing the look of concern that Gabriel gives him as he follows Genji out._ _  
_

_Jesse catches up with the cyborg not very far down the hall, “Hey, now I know I don’t know everythin’ that’s goin’ on but Gabe’s a good guy. He keeps his promises if he can. If we’re not goin’ back to… Hana-Hananna- Hamu-”_ _  
_

_“Hanamura.” Genji grunts._ _  
_

_“That! If we ain’t goin’ back there it’s prolly’ cause Jack and the rest’a the goody goodies told us we can’t. Sucks we gotta listen to ‘em but that’s the way when we’re the dogs. It’s not Gabe you gotta be mad at.”_ _  
_

_“No. It is not Commander Reyes I am angry with, not truly. I just felt revenge was at my fingertips, but now I must bide my time and allow my hatred to fester. It was not the plan.”_ _  
_

_“Hey now, we all got people we wanna put a bullet in, but what sorta revenge are you lookin’ for? Who’s the guy in Hanamura you wanna kill?”_ _  
_

_Genji regards Jesse, annoyance spreading of his features, yet he answers, “The man who killed me.”_

_“Well, ain’t he gonna get a shock when he sees yer alive!” McCree snorts, going to bump Genji with his elbow but stops before actually touching him. The glare Genji is sending his way makes him actually take a step away_

_“He will only have seconds to think about it. My blade is going to pierce through his heart and my brother will be dead, and there will be no Overwatch to rebuild him.”_ _  
_

_Jesse freezes, falling out of step with Genji. He couldn’t have heard him correctly. Jesse is focused on the scarred parts of Genji’s body and the metal plates covering his form. That had been-_ _  
_

_“You heard me correctly. My brother did this.” Genji turns, marching back and stopping in front of McCree, “He tore me apart and sliced me open with his sword. I am surprised you are so startled. Reyes made it out like you have seen worse in your… experience.”_ _  
_

_There’s bile rising in Jesse’s throat and he tilts his head down, hiding his face beneath his hat, “ I know we can’t right now, Genji, don’ wanna get on Gabe’s bad side… but I’m gonna help ya get yer bastard of a brother! Before our time’s up you’ll slice the fucker to pieces.”_ _  
_

_Genji actually throws his head back and laughs, flicking the brim of McCree’s hat with a metal finger, “I enjoy the way you think, Jesse. Those who betray their family- their flesh and blood - need to be punished for their sins.”_ _  
_

_“Ha, yeah..ain’t that the truth.” Jesse says, but his smirk wavers and he clutches tight to the brim of his hat, “Family killers don’t deserve to live.”_

 

\----

_“Think we’re finally screwed, Genji.” McCree pants, wiping the blood out of his eyes from where it pours down his forehead. There’s footsteps coming at them from both directions and McCree’s already used his Deadeye twice tonight. If the pounding in his temples is any indication, he’s already pushed it too far and another is gonna drop him to the ground. But he’d do it, he’d use the last of his strength if it meant Genji would survive. He lifts his gun shakily down the dark corridor and stops when a hand rests on his shoulder._

_“... I need you to stay low to the ground. Can you do that?”_

_“W-Wha’? Why? Yer not doin’ nothing reckless!”_

_“Should I allow you to continue using your little party trick until I must carry you out? Unacceptable. I still have a few tricks up my sleeve.”_

_“You don’t even have sleev-”_

_The first man rounds the corner, shoots, and Genji reflects the bullet right back into his chest with his katana._

_“Ryujin no ken wo kurae!”_

_The dragon that bursts from Genji’s sword stares into McCree’s eyes and the cowboy drops to the floor, watching as its jaws devour all of their enemies._

_When there’s only blood and death left, McCree gets to his feet slowly, watches as the sword is sheathed._

_“Hell, ain’t never seen nothin’ like that… guess I didn’ have to worry after all, huh?” He wonders for a moment how anyone could defeat Genji, then his question is answered._

_“... you should have seen my brother’s. He had two.”_

 

\----

 

_“Can you say Deadlock ever did anything worse than that? I think the Shimada have your little biker gang beat in terms of severity.” Genji says, amused that McCree boasted the reputation of a group of old men and children._

_“Oh, don’t act like yer proud of them doin’ bad shit. I ain’t proud of nothin’ to do with Deadlock, Im just sayin’ we weren't no joke. They liked to pick up up orphans and kids from poor families and make ‘em work. Kids would run along thinkin’ they’d hit the jackpot, but didn’ realize the family they were leavin’ behind. Then behind their backs Deadlock would go and kill their families and take everythin’ the poor folks had, which wasn’t worth nothin’ to ‘em, Deadlock just did it cause it hurt. They’d make the kids watch, or worse.” McCree leans his head back against the brick wall of their barracks and huffs, “Fuckers, can’t believe I got roped into that shit… trusted those people.”_

_“... is that what happened to your family? Were you forced to watch them be killed… or worse?” Genji inquires and McCree stills._

_“I didn’ say that. Fuck off.” McCree snaps and Genji smirks behind his mask, shrugging._

_“Those men are monsters. I hope they all rot. But, better to have your family killed because of you than have your family kill you in my opinion._

_“Shut it. Next time I want life advice from a well-adjusted person like yerself, I’ll ask.”_

 

_\----_

 

_“Gen-?”_

_“Did Reyes send you? Leave me. This is none of his concern.”_

_“Ah… no, I was just comin’ to check on yo- didn't Angela say ya shouldn't drink yet? She hasn't had time to fix yer liver properly.”_

_“I do not care.” Genji hisses, “I will make do. Hopefully I'll pass out.”_

_“Now come on, that's no way to be...hey! That's my whiskey!” McCree accuses, reaching out and trying to snatch the bottle. Genji moves swiftly out of the way._

_“And? What do you need it for?” Genji scoffs, takes a mouthful, “I have faced more tragedy, more /betrayal/. I should have all your liquor. A biker gang reject can go without.”_

_“This ain’t a competition to see who’s been through worse.” McCree says softly._

_“If it was I would win! I had my own brother slaughter me without a second thought. Imagine the betrayal, the shock, when he came at me with no hesitation or remorse!” Genji stumbles, leaning against the edge of his desk for support. As McCree looks around, avoiding meeting Genji’s gaze, he sees the room is trashed. Clothing and bottles thrown around. This wasn’t the first of McCree’s stash Genji had gotten into._ _  
_ _“I… I can’t imagine. Tell me.” McCree knows he is a glutton for punishment but wants to hear it, wallow in the reality of Genji’s pain._

_“I went there asking Hanzo to flee our family. Together we could go, start our lives away from the expectations of our family. Then he drew his sword. Commit myself to the family or be murdered. ‘I would rather be dead’, I said… he had always been more skilled than me. Older, stronger, darker. His soul easily swayed and filled with hatred. I sobbed, begged, reached out to him and still he cut me down. Relentlessly, heartlessly. His own brother, Jesse. Before that I had never felt closer to another than Hanzo. Now I am without and plagued with the reality that my one true confidant had no care for my life. I was nothing to him. Nothing but a body. Well what now, that I am not longer my own body but just my mind?”_ _  
_

_“_ _I’m sure you weren’t nothin’ to hi-”_ _  
_

_“Cease! I was nothing. He did not care. He killed me and I hope he carries that weight until his dying day and hopefully it is at my hands.”_

_Jesse steps forward, ever so slowly placing his hand on the bottle Genji held, “... I know he carried it with him. Just… lemme have the bottle and get’cha into bed, alright?”_ _  
_

_“Jesse.” It’s growled in warning._ _  
_

_Jesse’s hands are shaking as he pulls the bottle away from him, “I know. Yer allowed to be angry, upset, but… just trust me. Let’s get’cha settled down.”_

_Surprisingly, Genji allows himself to be maneuvered over the bed and laid down. He’s looking up at Jesse who feels exposed under the gaze._ _  
_

_“... I wish you had been my brother instead. You have always been good to me, despite my attitude toward you.”_

_McCree’s trembling hands fumble with the blanket and that nauseous feeling rises up in his throat, “ ‘preciate that, Genji.” He murmurs as he covers him with the blanket, “I’ll sit with ya, alright?”_ _  
_

_“Thank you.” Genji murmurs, and it isn’t long before he falls asleep, leaving Jesse to sit and stew in his own cloud of betrayal and shame._

 

\----

 

 _The bright lights hurt and Mccree groans, squeezing tired eyes shut to block them out. His head hurts, his ears are ringing, and there’s a sharp pain in his right forearm. That’s when he remembers and Jesse’s eyes fly open, taking in the hospital room where he’s being kept. In front of the door the Cyborg stands firm, keeping guard._ _  
_ _“_

_Genji-” McCree chokes out, watching as furious red eyes turn on him._ _  
_

_“You fool. You ingrate.”Genji growls, leaving his place at the door to approach McCree’s bed. Jesse can’t help the way he flinches, pushing himself back against the headboard._ _  
_

_“Ingrate, huh? Someone’s been spending too much time with Gabe.”_ _  
_

_“It is the truth. You have no clue how much this has affected him. He gave you everything and this is how you repay his kindness? By throwing it all away!?”_ _  
_

_Jesse swallows, pulling his arm up against his chest, as if he can hide the damage already done, “... I don’t owe him nothin’-” He says, but knows he’s not convincing, he doesn’t even believe himself._ _  
_

_“You do. We all do. For how angry we are, for all the bad we’ve done, Reyes has given us a chance. Yet you throw it all away. Drown yourself in your cigarettes and liquor, fine, but this? What is so terrible? Did your little biker gang beat you too many times? Starve you? A joke. You don’t know pain, betrayal.” Genji scoffs._ _  
_

_“Don’t act like you understand! You don’t know shit!” Jesse yells, gasping as Genji grabs him by his injured arm and pulls it free, turning it over and exposing bandages that are being soaked through with blood._ _  
_

_“Then tell me! What could be so terrible that you drove a knife into you flesh!?”_ _  
_

_Jesse swallows, his eyes wet and far away when he looks up at Genji, “I-I’m sorry.”_ _  
_

_Genji blinks, loosening his grip as a sob tore from Jesse’s throat, “Jess-”_ _  
_

_“I’m so fuckin’ sorry. I didn’ mean ta do it. I’m just as bad as yer brother. I’m sorry, Genji.”_

_“E-Easy. Breathe.” Genji says, clearly alarmed by the outburst, unsure how to proceed._

_“I wanted to rip that ink out so bad, just kept remindin’ me what I did. Didn’t wanna die just wanted to cut it /out/. You think D-Deadlock's a joke but they ain't.  They're family killers, the worst kind. Every single one'a them.”_ _  
_

_“Jesse.”_ _  
_

_“Even me. /I/ killed her, not no one else. It’s my fault she’s dead! My baby sister didn’t do nothin’ wrong and I-I-” Jesse can’t speak anymore as he curls in on himself and his form is wracked with sobs._

 

_\----_

 

_“W-What’s she doin’ ‘ere?” McCree says, hiding the tremble that sneaks into his hand._ _  
_

_“You want to be in Deadlock, right kid?”_ _  
_

_“Yeah, but-”_ _  
_

_“Then you gotta prove yer loyalty. Deadlock is your family now. Gonna keep ya safe, clothed, fed, and rollin’ in the fuckin’ dough. You gotta prove ya want it.”_ _  
_

_“Whatever you ask, sir, I’ll do it.” Ashe says without hesitation._ _  
_

_Jesse hates that Ashe is a few inches taller than him. When she stands up straight she radiates more confidence than he ever could, presenting herself as the perfect edition to Deadlock. McCree just looks like the dog that followed her here._ _  
_

_“That’s the spirit, Elizabeth.” Their leader praises, picking up two bolt-action shotguns from the tailgate of his truck and placing them in the children’s hands._ _  
_

_“Sir-”_ _  
_

_“Quit talkin’.” Ashe hisses, silencing McCree’s questions._ _  
_

_“Prove to me you wanna be ‘ere. Just do this one thing and you’ll have my trust forever.”_ _  
_

_“Easy.” Ashe smirks, working the bolt on the gun and clicking off the safety. She raises the gun to her shoulder and looks through the sights._ _  
_

_“Wait!” McCree shouts, and isn’t interrupted this time. Deadlock’s leader would watch how this played out, testing them, “That… that’s yer brother, Ashe.”_ _  
_

_“An’ yer point?”_ _  
_

_“Yer holdin’ a /gun/.”_ _  
_

_“Eh, never liked the kid.”_ _  
_

_“E-Elizabeth? Sis’?” The kid is shaking, knees knocking together and threatening to collapse under the hot desert sun._ _  
_

_There was nothing but sand for miles in either direction. Behind them a truck was parked and in front of them two children stood down range like a pair of targets._ _  
_

_“Please, you’re just jokin’, right sis’?”_ _  
_

_“Ashe, come on, you’re not gonna-” McCree stumbles as Ashe grabs him by his bandana and yanks him forward until they’re eye-to-eye._ _  
_

_“What’cha think we were joinin’, huh? A bookclub? S’gang, McCree, don’t be a fuckin’ chicken shit.”_ _  
_

_“But that’s my-”_ _  
_

_Ashe shoves him back and raises the shotgun to her shoulder. Before anyone can move, shout, act - the little white haired boy drops to the ground with a bullet between his eyes._ _  
_

_A sob rings out from the other child as she’s left standing next to a dead body, the gunshot ringing in everyone’s ears._

_“Excellent work, ‘Calamity’ Ashe.” Their leader praises, his eyes turning to McCree._ _  
_

_“Well, Jesse?”_ _  
_

_McCree had been avoiding it but finally meets eyes with her, small and crying with her beautiful black braids all mussed. They must have grabbed her and thrown her into the back of the truck before he’d gotten there today._ _  
_

_“I-It’s okay, alright? Everythin’s gonna be alright, Hay-Hay.” McCree soothes, wanting to run to her and comfort her. She shouldn’t have to be scared, not of him._ _  
_

_“Jess-”_ _  
_

_“Oh, quit with the blubberin’.” Ashe raises her gun again, “Shoot’er or I will.”_ _  
_

_Jesse’s face falls into a scowl, “Ashe, you said we'd be able to stay together if I joined.” As he steps forward she steps backs, shotgun still trained on the young girl._ _  
_

_“Do it. Or I will.”_ _  
_

_“ Ashe… I don’t want this.” McCree says in a harsh whisper, “Not if it means this.”_ _  
_

_“I think you’re a little too late, kid.” Their leader smirks, “If Jesse doesn’t kill her, you do, Ashe. Understood?”_ _  
_

_“Yessir.”_ _  
_

_Holding a gun had always brought Jesse a sense of steady surety. When he lifts the shotgun he feels unsteadiness and nausea. He just knows if someone has to do it he’s not gonna let it be Ashe, the traitor._ _  
_

_“Hay-Hay, close your eyes, okay?”_ _  
_

_“J-Jesse? I’m scared. They just grabbed me from the house, I didn’t know what was goin’ on. Please, I j-jus’ wanna go home.” She hiccups, tears stream down her face._ _  
_

_“Don’t be scared, Haseya. It’s’okay. Close your eyes, just listen to m-me. Yer big brother’s got’cha, alright?”_

_Her eyes close and Jesse's heart falls, finger hovering over the trigger._

_“I love you, Haseya. More than anythin’.”_

_“L-Love you too, Jesse. Are we gonna get to go home?”_

_“... yeah. Yeah, home soon.” Jesse closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and lets his finger squeeze the trigger._

_He doesn't open his eyes when the gun fires, isn't sure where he hit until he hears the scream and the litany of sobs. McCree's eyes snap open and the first thing he sees is the blood, pooling and pouring from Haseya's abdomen onto the desert ground._

_“Hasey-!” A large hand grabs him by the arm and pulls him toward truck. McCree struggles against the hold, wanting to run and comfort his baby sister, stroke the hair he'd so carefully brushed and plaited this morning. He'd never expected the day to go like this._

_“You've proven yourself. Don’t make this worth nothin’.”_

_Jesse and Ashe are loaded into the truck, the echoing of sobs waving them off as Jesse struggles not to cry, waiting for a time when he was alone to grieve. Only then would the reality of his actions sink in and he'd be left forever with that scar on his heart._

 

_\----_

 

_“Desearía que hablaras conmigo, Mijo.”_ _  
_

_Jesse curls further in on himself, holding his bandaged arm to his chest. He can feel Gabriel stroking a hand up and down his back but doesn’t acknowledge it._ _  
_

_“Genji came and got me. Said you told him about Haseya.”_ _  
_

_Jesse whimpers and presses his face into the pillow, “Don’t.”_ _  
_

_“He doesn’t blame you.”_ _  
_

_No response._ _  
_

_“Y eso como te hace sentir?”_ _  
_

_“Bad! It makes me feel bad!” Jesse sits up and glares daggers at Gabriel, but it’s undermined by the tears in his eyes, “Genji should blame me! He should hate me! ‘You were just a child, McCree. It was not your fault, McCree’.” Jesse balls his hands into fists and looks for something to lash out at before throwing his pillow across the room. He’d used his hurt arm and winces, pulling it to his chest. “It was my fault!”_

_“Jesse, sweetheart-”_ _  
_

_“Don’t.”_ _  
_

_“_ _Que no fue tu culpa.”_ _  
_

_“Nothin’ short of her comin’ back as a damn robot like Genji is gonna make me believe ya’ll so you may as well drop it!”_ _  
_

_“She would forgive you.” Gabriel says gently._ _  
_

_“That’s nice… can I have my pillow back?”_ _  
_

_Gabriel gets up and goes to retrieve the pillow, fluffing it up and setting it behind Jesse’s back, “ If you ever need anything, Jesse-”_ _  
_

_Jesse looks away but Gabriel sits on the edge of the bed and holds his hand tightly, “You’re running, Mijo. You’ve been able to tell me things before and I’ve gotten you what you needed, yeah? Your chest surgery? Your meds? My help extends to everything, Jesse. All you have to do is tell me and I will do everything I can, Hijo. Understood?”_ _  
_

_“Understood.”_ _  
_

_“Now, do you want me to stay with you?”_ _  
_

_Jesse doesn’t answer, just moves to the edge of the bed, leaving enough space for Gabriel to lay down beside him. Gabriel climbs into the bed and goes back to stroking Jesse’s back as the boy curls up and is finally able to go to sleep._ _  
_ _  
_ _\----_

 

“She-” Jesse laughs wetly against the collar of Hanzo’s shirt, “-she ran out of the house wearin’ just dad’s boots and my hat, naked as the damn day she was born. Couldn't have been more than three at the time. Surprised we ever got Haseya wearin’ clothes.” Jesse can’t believe he’s saying her name, let alone telling a story of their childhood. There are warring feelings of grief and relief in his chest. It feels wonderful to speak of her after having locked those memories away from so long, especially when he has someone so wonderful who would listen. 

“Genji was much the same. One time-” Hanzo can’t hold back his snort and Jesse’s eyes snap up, completely smitten with Hanzo’s stupid laugh, “- he ran into one of my father’s meetings completely in the nude. My father had to cover him in his own robe and usher him out. He would have been almost the same age.”

“Fuckin’ kids man.” McCree laughs, “Bein’ a big siblin’ was awesome. Felt like I had a purpose, ya know?” It wasn’t uncommon, when their mother hadn’t been getting them to do schoolwork, for McCree to watch over his little sister and for her to follow after him right on his heels.

“It provided a sense of responsibility, yes, even if they were quite the handful.” 

Jesse hums and lays his head back against Hanzo’s chest, hugging him tightly. As he goes quiet he feels Hanzo begin to rub his back soothingly, the bad feelings starting to bubble up again in his throat. 

“Say it again?” McCree whispers. 

“I do not blame you. I will not leave you. We have both done terrible things to our siblings but your situation… you were a child, Jesse. It was an impossible situation. She would not blame you.” 

“... I said one time I’d never forgive myself unless she showed up back from the dead like Genji. How do you do it?” 

“The cyborg part is helpful.” Hanzo admits, smiles when Jesse pinches his side,  “However, I can tell you before I knew Genji lived it was easier in some ways. I did not have a face to be accountable to and could believe I was honoring him - which I was.”

Hanzo runs his fingers along Jesse’s jaw and makes him look up. “Honoring her, thinking of her, doing _good_. All those things eventually bring a sense of peace and make life feel more possible. Your remorse never leaves, your memories do not fade, but you live.” 

“And now that Genji’s back?” Jesse asks softly. 

“I cannot just light incense and apologize to a memory. I must constantly work to make him proud and discuss with him hardships I did not have to before. Then there is the reality of seeing his scars. I believe that is the most difficult.” 

“Guess I won’t ever have to worry ‘bout that part.” Tears start pooling in Jesse’s eyes again and Hanzo grabs the tissue that is not far away. He pulls a few out and wipes at Jesse’s eyes.

“No, which is why you honor her memory… have you ever had a service for her?” 

Jesse frowns and hugs a little tighter while Hanzo - sensing Jesse’s discomfort - pulls him in closer and kisses his forehead, “It is alright if you have not. You have not really been in a place to conduct such a thing. We could hold a small service, of sorts, with you and I and Genji.” 

Jesse goes quiet, thinking the idea over. His first instinct is to reject the idea. Jesse does not like to bring up her memory, the pain too much to cope with most of the time. But perhaps Hanzo was right, if he chose to honour her it could relieve some of the pain. Maybe Jesse would finally begin to move on.

He'd be able to stop pushing his guilt down, keeping the secret so close to his chest. He could have two people who know him and still love him. 

“How do we do it without a body?” He asks, having only ever experienced the death of his parents and the large military funerals of Overwatch. 

“I would light an incense, lay a sparrow feather, and sip tea as I bowed and … simply spoke to him. Apologized, told him stories of my life, explained my goals. I spoke of how I was improving… is that something you would be interested in?” 

“Gimme some time to think about it?” Jesse requests, unsure of what items would even evoke Haseya’s memory. 

“We have all the time in the world, Jesse. Thank you for telling me. I hope you do not feel as if you were forc-” 

“No! No.” Jesse makes Hanzo look down at him, pulling at the man’s shirt until their eyes meet, “I wasn’t plannin’ on tellin’ you or anybody else, but don’t mistake that for me not bein’... pleased? I dunno if that’s the right word.” Jesse’s brow furrows as he looks down at licks his lips, “It lifts some of that weight, is what I mean.” 

“I will gladly carry your weight, Jesse.” Hanzo breathes and Jesse looks up. Then he starts to get up, wiggling and making quite the mess of the blankets as he tries to sit up on the bed a bit. Hanzo is frowning at him as he disrupts them. 

“What on earth are yo- Mm!” Hanzo startles as Jesse finally gets up to his level and presses their lips together, Hanzo’s face held between his palms. 

Jesse is just so endlessly grateful. He never thought he would truly find someone who understands his burden but he sees himself in Hanzo. Before he was ashamed and angry to admit it, taking it out on the man. Now he was thankful for the companionship he found through Hanzo, so much that he kisses the man breathless even as tears begin streaking over his cheeks once more. 

Hanzo begins to return the kiss, his own hands coming up to wipe Jesse’s cheeks clean. The affection and acceptance makes Jesse _melt_ into a puddle of cowboy, all spread out over Hanzo and kissing him like he needs him to live. 

At this point he may. 

Eventually Jesse pulls back a touch, just giving them enough room to breathe, the air between them intermingling. Jesse is panting, breath coming fast, and he sees that Hanzo is in the same boat. Hanzo looks _amazed._ His expression is open, a small smile curling up the corner of his lips as he pants. 

“Jesse-” 

“Thank you, Hanzo.”

“ _Jesse-”_ _  
_

“I’m grateful for you, I appreciate you. I never imagined this would’a happened tonight but _thank you_. I feel-” Jesse’s face scrunches up and he’s glad that Hanzo knows. 

“Relieved. Like a weight has been lifted?” 

“Yeah.” Jesse slumps back down against Hanzo’s chest and his eyes fall shut. He is in awe of how light he feels. 

“You are not in this alone. I have you, Jesse. You will never have to carry that weight by yourself again.” 

And Jesse feels weightless as he sinks against Hanzo and lets exhaustion pull him under.

 

\----

“So, these’re forget-me-nots… they were her favourite flower. And, uh, I know it jus’ looks like one of my serapes but mama made us both a bunch, s’like all we wore. Then, uh-” McCree grimaces, hoping it doesn’t come off as overly morbid when he lays one of Peacekeeper’s rounds on the walkway next to the other items. “It’s just cause I use these for good now and n-not-” He swallows and steps back, in line with Hanzo and Genji on either of his sides. 

“I think it is wonderful gesture.” Hanzo assures. 

Jesse nods firmly and just stares at the items, the ocean crashing softly against the rocks below. It becomes clear that Jesse is unsure of what to say, and as the man’s hands begin to tremble Genji steps forward. 

“Haseya McCree. Although I never had the chance to meet you myself I have known your brother a very long time. From him I have learned that you were kind, smart, and just as silly as he is. Jesse speaks of you with so much fondness and love that I feel as though you have always been a part of my life. Knowing Jesse-” Genji swallows and turns slightly to look at his brother, “- it helped me begin to forgive my own brother. I began to realize that people are a victim of circumstance, that their actions are not always their fault. Neither my brother nor yours are bad men. They are _good_ men, the best I have ever met. You would be proud of Jesse McCree, just as I am.”

Jesse’s breath gets pushed from his lungs and he feels tears spills over his cheeks. He pushes himself forward until he’s kneeling in front of the items, unknowingly similar to how Hanzo would kneel in front of the offerings to his own brother. 

“Hay-Hay… s’been awhile since I talked to ya. I think of ya all the time, s’just-” Jesse squeezes his eyes shut and a takes a breath, “ - I blame myself. I shot the gun that killed ya. Genji and Hanzo, even Gabe, all said it wasn’t my fault. Course I didn’t wanna do it but-” The tears pick up again and Jesse rubs his face with his sleeve, “- what kinda brother would I be if I let Ashe or someone else take ya? I wanted to give you one more second where ya didn’t have to worry ‘cause yer big brother was lookin’ after ya. But I didn’t do that did I?”

Jesse sinks lower, his forehead pressed to the ground. “ _I’m sorry_ , _Haseya_. I’m gonna do everythin’ I can to be a better man. Everythin’ I can to make it up to you. I’m sorry, Sweetheart. I’m so _fucking sorry_.” 

Jesse feels the serape laid over his shaking shoulders. When he lifts his head he watches as Genji takes the forget-me-nots and tosses them into the surf. He looks up to his right and sees Hanzo, who still had a hand on his shoulder, giving him a little nod. 

Jesse rises to shaky feet, picking up the bullet along the way. He unsheathes peacekeeper, loads the bullet and looks out over the waves. 

There are no targets but he still feels the world slow around him, the air becoming hot. He knows that his brown eyes deepen into a sharp burgundy and his arm is held completely straight to the sea without any hesitation. 

“You know what time it is.” 

Time to move on, time to forgive, time to _rise_. 

Jesse pulls the trigger.  
  
_“Haseya. What’s it mean?”_ _  
_

_“It is Navajo for ‘She Rises’ or ‘Rise Up’.”_ _  
_

_“Why’s she get such a cool name, Mama?”_ _  
_

_She’d laughed, “I have a feeling Haseya will go through much, but she will always rise up afterwards. While you, Jesse, are a ‘gift’. You will meet many wonderful people and they will appreciate you because you are good to them.”_ _  
  
_

Jesse closes his eyes as he slips peacekeeper back into his holster, unsure how far the bullet went into the sea. 

There’s a hand on either of his shoulders and he turns back, allowing himself to be wrapped up in the arms of two wonderful people. Neither brother says anything, they just hold Jesse until the shaking stops and they can all go inside. 

Jesse McCree takes one took back toward the water, wipes his face again, and goes inside. He’s ready to start a new chapter.

 

\----

 

“The partner with your hands on the shoulders, please stroke those hands up the length of the neck until your thumbs rest beneath the ears. Use your thumbs to presses and masses the flesh directly beneath the ear. This is a point of access to your lymphatic system. The partner with your hands on the torso, simply leave your hands on the waist and feel the warmth and solidity. We will swap roles in a few moments.” 

“Yer puttin’ me to sleep.” Jesse whispers, learning into the pressure beneath his ears. 

“I am not sure if Zenyatta means for his meditation to always be a prelude to your naps.” Hanzo snickers, adding more pressure and Jesse melts. 

“Think it’s mostly yer doin’.” 

There’s a robotic throat being cleared and the two shut up, going back to the exercise.

“I wish my chastisement of them worked as well, Zen.” Genji grins, then mutters a quiet ‘ow’ when Zenyatta flicks him for speaking out as well.

“Please move your fingers from your partner’s neck to the base of the skull, pressing your fingers against there to relieve some of the tension on the spine. Hold that pressure- then release.” 

Jesse lets out a long breath as Hanzo lets go. The action is repeated a few more times before they switch, Jesse digging his fingers into the pressure points along Hanzo’s neck and skull until the man is pudding beneath his finger tips. 

“As we come to the end of the session please embrace one another however you wish. Take the time to breathe, unwind, and then you may leave whenever you wish. Thank you for joining me again. I appreciate all of your companionship.” 

“Thank ya kindly, Zen.” 

“Thank you, Zenyatta.” 

“Always a pleasure, Master.”  
Jesse allows himself to shimmy forward until his head is in the crook of Hanzo’s neck and his arms are wrapped tightly around the man’s middle. He feels arms around his own waist and Hanzo’s head leant against him. They give themselves a few moments to embrace but they’re impatient to get to their room and sleep. 

Hanzo dislodges himself first and Jesse is more than happy to be pulled along toward his room. These sessions always ended with the two being eager to fall into one another's arms again, but this time in a more private and comfortable location.

Jesse feels a little jolt of satisfaction when Hanzo uses his own hand on the scanner to unlock his room. They walk inside and Jesse laughs as he feels himself pushed toward the bed, stumbling in that direction and allowing himself to fall down on it. He doesn’t flinch when he feels a weight covering his back, or when he feels lips against his neck. It’s a warm comfort and Jesse sinks into the bed, letting himself be kissed and pampered without saying much. 

Until he feels hands sliding down his sides and pinning his hips. 

“Ha, hey, sweetpea. You, ah, got a lil’ somethin’ in mind?” Jesse asks, feeling the weight lift off his back. He uses the opportunity to roll over and finds his wrists pinned to the sides of his head. 

“Spending time with you, yes. And more…” Hanzo trails off, occupying his mouth with the side of Jesse’s neck. 

Jesse groans softly and lays his head back, struggling to free one of his hands as he can pet at Hanzo’s hair. 

He feels a flat tongue against his skin and tightens his grip on Hanzo’s hair, moves to roll his hips-

“ _Agents Hanzo Shimada and Jesse McCree. I have an immediate briefing for a mission. Please accept the message at your earliest convenience for a full debrief.”_ _  
_

Jesse groans and releases his hold on Hanzo, letting the man roll off of him and lay next to him on the bed. 

“ We accept the message, Athena. Please give us the information.” Hanzo requests. 

“Haven’t had a mission in weeks and the second ya start gettin’ handsy we get interrupted.” 

“I am sure it was not intentional.” Hanzo assures, soothing.

_“Personnel: Agent Hanzo Shimada and Agent Jesse McCree. Location: Deadlock Gorge. Objective: Stealth and Recon. Observe the activity of the Deadlock gang to determine their threat level. Other Information: Since Agent Lena ‘Tracer’ Oxton's retrieval of Agent Echo, and Elizabeth Caledonia ‘Calamity’ Ashe's retaliation and destruction of the train tracks Deadlock's presence has been more active and the citizens are becoming concerned. Observe Deadlock and intervene if necessary. Your departure time and flight information is being emailed to your personal coms now. Thank you for your time agents.”_

Jesse feels a hand in his own, Hanzo’s voice raising in his ear as his partner tries to get his attention.

“Breathe, Jesse. You are here in my room. You are not there yet. You do not have to go. We will talk to Winston and Commander Morrison about it, you do not-” 

“No, it ain’t-” Jesse takes a deep breath, grips onto Hanzo’s hands and squeezes tightly, “No, I’m okay. Just thinkin’, I ain’t been back to the Gorge since… hell, you remember I said I ain’t been back since I killed Deadlock’s boss? Wanted to keep it that way. Wasn’t plannin’ on goin’ back anymore.” 

Hanzo nods, bringing Jesse’s hand to his lips for a kiss. “We will not have to. I will have the mission reassigned. They cannot ask you to do this. Athena? Patch me through to either Commander, this will be fixed immediate-” 

There’s a gruff voice ringing in the back of Jesse’s ears, repeating again and again -

_‘You’re running, Mijo’._ _  
_

If this mission went well Deadlock could potentially be destroyed. Ashe would not longer be able to tear families apart. He’d finally have his revenge- was that was he wanted? Revenge against the one who pulled him and Haseya into Deadlock’s grasp?

“Han’, just wait a minute, Sweetpea.” Jesse says, rubbing a hand over his face, “I ain’t keen on bein’ in the Gorge… but if I can stop Ashe? I know revenge don’t make it better but still… isn’t it somethin’ I should do?” 

“Vengeance is a hollow victory.” Hanzo murmurs, stroking his thumb over Jesse’s knuckles, “But I am not one to deter you. It is a reality you must discover for yourself, lest you never give up the urge for retaliation. I just do not wish to see you hurt or burdened by what we find.

“I’m already burdened, ain’t like a lil’ more’s really gonna hurt.” McCree rises to his feet and picks his hat off the bed, places it back on his head and straightens his shoulders

“I believed that once but it seems, in fact, that each bit of burden has its own weight.” Hanzo says, standing beside Jesse and placing a comforting hand on his back, “You need not do this.”

“Nah, I think I gotta. Athena? Get us that itinerary. We got a mission.” 

“ _Absolutely Agent McCree. Please check your personal coms I have sent the information to you.”_

“Recon, Jesse. We do not need a repeat of your show at the shipyard.” Hanzo teases, but there is worry in his voice. Jesse wraps an arm around him and pulls him close, warning him this time. 

“I ain’t makin’ no promises.”

 

\----

 

The heat is as overwhelming as ever. It’s almost noon and the sun is high above their heads, beating down against them. Jesse notices sweat dripping over Hanzo’s forehead and chest and takes the hat off his head, motioning to set it on top of Hanzo’s head. 

“Do not. It will mess up my aim if were are to get into battle.” 

“I like to think it makes my aim better.” Jesse grins, going quiet as he sees movement down below. It just ends up being a stray cat running through Big Earl’s and Jesse breathes again. 

It isn’t a surprise to Jesse that Deadlock has been causing more trouble. Ashe hated losing so her failure with Echo and Lena would have made her outraged. It also wasn’t good for Ashe that she’d blown up the train tracks, the only thorough traffic the Gorge saw anymore. He couldn’t understand why they hadn’t just jumped on the damn thing when it came by. Other than Ashe being a coward since he’d always been the one who did the train hopping. 

There’s movement again and McCree ignored it, thinking it’s probably the damn cat again when loud laughter fill the cavern. 

“She hasn’t even shown up! See? Nothin’ to worry ‘bout, boys! Let’s dig through the wreckage, I know for a fact those train cars got precious metals in their walls. Tear it out, we gotta send that shipment of scrap to Junkertown on the next freight.” 

“Yes ma’am!”

Less than a month ago he’d already be down there, pinning Ashe to the ground and ripping her to pieces. Now he just grips the rock face under his metal hand until the rock cracks. 

“They are probably scared Lena will return.” Hanzo whispers, “Or other members of Overwatch to stop them from raiding the wreckage.” 

“Ha, little do they know-” McCree pulls peacekeeper from her holster and Hanzo levels him with a look. 

“McCree-” 

“I ain’t gonna do anythin’ dangerous, just gettin’ prepared. I didn’t make no promises.” McCree assures, even if his eyes are locked on Ashe. If he focused for a second longer he’d be able to zero in on Ashe, the air would grow hot, time would go slow and a bullet would go straight through her head. Jesse’s finger twitches against the trigger and he’s only brought out of it when his partner nudges him. 

Hanzo huffs, “No, you did not,” and pulls his bowstring taught, clearly in preparation for when Jesse decides to do something stupid. Jesse knows he won’t be able to watch her for very long before he’s completely overtaken with his need for vengeance. Even if Hanzo has warned him against it he does need to find out for himself, only then can he know if revenge is truly worth it.

Ashe lets her handful of men take care of the dirty work while she walks around lazily with B.O.B. Men, Jesse thinks, is a strong word for the young adults running along and ripping up the train cars. In typical Deadlock fashion these new recruits she’s bringing in are young, and McCree just hopes they didn’t have to prove themselves in the old way. 

As Ashe rounds the corner past the welcome sign Hanzo motions for them to move through the passage to their right so they can overlook the sight of the wreckage. 

“I am not going to scold you for breaking our mission parameters here… just do it wisely.” 

“Yeah, don’t worry, I got a pla-” 

Then a shot rings out and one of the men - who had been pulling copper wires out of the car - falls. McCree doesn’t see where the shot came from but suddenly there’s an ear-piercing shout. 

“McCree!!!” 

Jesse pushes Hanzo back into the cavern, keeping both their heads low. 

“She saw you?” 

“I didn’t think!” 

“Where did that shot come from?” 

“Yer not stoppin’ me again, McCree! Come out an’ quit bein’ a coward!” 

Jesse frowns as he listens to Ashe rant and rave. _Again?_ Had she thought he’d been a part of Overwatch’s rescue of Echo? 

They come out the other side of the cavern and come face-to-face with the group of retreating Deadlock members. They raise their weapons but Hanzo and McCree already fire, an arrow in one forehead and two bullets in two others. 

When Ashe comes round, following her crew, she stops in her tracks. Jesse doesn’t understand the shock on Ashe’s face since she’d just called out his name moments ago. 

“ _You_.” She snarls, cocking the lever on her Viper. “You’ve got a lotta nerve comin’ back here, Jesse McCree. Could’a gone my whole life without seein’ yer ugly mug again.”

“Yeah, could say the same ‘bout you. That really the look you were goin’ for when ya got up this morning?” Jesse snickers, loving how her face heats up in anger. She was too easy. “What’cha gonna do with that gun? Your aim any better?” 

Hanzo has to push McCree off the walkway and down onto even ground with Ashe and B.O.B as a bullet rips past their heads. 

“ _Must_ you antagonize her?” 

“It’s a lil’ too fun.” Jesse groans, getting back up to his feet, dusting the dirt off. 

“How’s that for aim?” 

“Ain’t bad.” Jesse huffs, pulling peacekeeper out, “We can’t let you guys keep operatin’, Ashe. There’s barely anythin’ left to Deadlock. Think it’s ‘bout time ya’ll let it die.” 

“No. It’s your fault there’s nothin’ left! Fuckin’ traitors and Overwatch and _McCrees.”_ _  
_

_Plural?_ Jesse frowns, continues on, “Drop your gun, Ashe. Let’s do this civil.” 

“I’ve given _everythin’_ for Deadlock. I’m in too deep for civil.” 

Jesse sees a flash of pain on her face and almost feels sorry for her. Elizabeth had given her family, her wealth, her _brother_. And for what? To eventually grow old and be alone? It was a shame, but Jesse doesn’t have any empathy to spare for her. 

“I’m sorry you feel that way, Ashe.”

Ashe must hate the pity in his voice because she yells for B.O.B, and as Jesse prepares to duck into the gas station - out of the anticipated barrage of bullets - he sees that B.O.B doesn’t move. 

“B.O.B!? B.O.B!” Ashe shouts as the omnic slumps to the ground. 

“... there is an electrical field in the air short circuiting him.” Hanzo states and Ashe yells, not at them, but above them on the wooden platform. 

“Turn it off! You said ya wouldn’t do that to him again!” 

The air begins to get heavy in a way that is more than familiar to Jesse. From the first time he’d used it to kill the Deadlock members who were harassing him, to the last time at Haseya’s memorial, Jesse was used to the constricting heat. Except this time it squeezes Jesse’s chest too tight and he wonders if this is how the Deadeye felt to others.

Except that didn’t make sense. There’s no one else- 

Jesse turns and he’s blinded by the sun that’s risen over the top of the Gorge. It makes it impossible to see the figure that’s only a few feet above them. The person has a gun raised, past them and pointed toward Ashe. 

“Y-You said you wouldn’t use it on him again!” Ashe yells, but she’s scared. McCree has never witnessed so much waver in her voice. 

“An’ you promised ya wouldn’t cause no more trouble in the Gorge but some months back ya blew up the fuckin’ train. The _train_ , the only thing that gets resources to people here. That goes ‘gainst our deal in the worst way, Elizabeth.” 

“I’m sorry but I-” 

A shot hits the ground in front of Ashe’s feet, inches from the toe of her boot. 

“ _Sorry ain’t good enough_.”

The air is so hot McCree feels himself wheeze, doubling over with arms around his stomach. No one else had the Deadeye. It wasn’t possible. It wasn’t an implant or mutation is was just _him_. 

“Jesse? !” Hanzo is there, hands on his arms and trying to keep him on his feet. But then suddenly the heat dissipates and he can breathe once more.

“Fine, ‘m fine.” Jesse coughs, but he’s not really fine. He tries squinting through the blinding sun until his eyes burn. 

Suddenly B.O.B rises to his feet and seems to slightly lean on Ashe, who’s tucked her gun under her arm in favor of helping him stand. 

“No more Deadlock. No more bullshit. I gave ya more than enough warnin’s and let you play yer lil’ games but I ran outta patience. Get goin’ before I put a bullet in both your heads.” The stranger threatens and Ashe steps back with B.O.B.

“You wouldn’t!” 

The air grows heavy again and Jesse falls to his knees this time as it weighs him down. 

“Try me, Ashe.” 

Ashe scrambles, tugging B.O.B along in retreat toward the Cave of Mystery, “Too many fuckin’ McCrees ‘round here! I’ll kill both of ya’ll one day! The traitor and the nosy bitch! It’s too bad McCree wasn’t a better shot back then!”

It’s too bad McCree wasn’t a better shot back then. It’s too bad McCree wasn’t a better shot back then. _It’s too bad McCree wasn’t a better shot back then_. 

McCree looks far up and at this angle the sun is blocked by the cliffs overhead. He’s able to see the woman on the platform above them. Her skin is dark and her black braided hair is mostly covered by an old brown hat. She slides her bolt-action shotgun into the scabbard on her back and leaps down from the platform, landing in front of McCree.

He stares at her cowboy boots first before his eyes travel up, past the thickness of her thighs, the solidness of her form. She wears leather duster that almost reaches her feet and wrapped around her shoulders was a dusty brown serape. 

A sob frees itself from Jesse’s throat as he sees frayed wool edges and familiar geometric patterns that his mother liked to weave. Impossible, it was _impossible._

She kneels down in front of him, licks her lips as if she’s unsure of what to say. She settles on, “Hey, Jess’.” 

And the dam breaks. Jesse plants his head on the ground like he had during her memorial, except it isn’t clothing, bullets and flowers in front of him. _It’s her_.

“ _Haseya. Hay-Hay. Como estas vivo Te dejé ahí afuera, oh dios. Todavía estabas vivo. Haseya, no, no, no, lo siento mucho. Lo siento mucho, por favor. No merezco esta vida después de lo que te hice. Merezco lo que haces por lo que te hice. No te he protegido, hermana. Oh dios lo siento mucho.”_ _  
_

_“Ah, parar! Eso es suficiente!_ Jess’, no, no I ain’t gonna hurt ya. I ain’t lookin’ for revenge, I wouldn’t. You’re my _brother_. _Te extrañé mucho, Jesse._ I missed you so much, please-”

Jesse looks up, pulling his hat off his head and holding it to his chest, the other planted firmly to the ground. When he sees her face the tears come once more and he has to duck  his head down, grit his teeth so he doesn’t completely shout in his anguish and remorse. Is this how Hanzo felt each time he looked at Genji? No wonder-

“I _shot_ you.” He chokes. 

“Ya didn’ wanna.” 

“That don’t matter!” Jesse sobs, “Intention don’t matter, _actions_ matter. I shot you, I killed you, I-I-I-” 

He feels hands cup either side of his face and looks up. His whole body is overcome by the rollercoaster of emotions that accompanies the sight of her face. She’s _beautiful_. Haseya looks so much like their mother, with a her thick features and slightly hooked nose. Her eyes are the same brown as his own and they hold a kindness he wasn’t expecting to see.

There’s also a hardness that he’d never wanted to see.

“You should hurt me.”

“Jess-” 

“Jesse McCree.” Jesse feels a tug at the back of his serape so powerful yanks him to his feet and he stumbles, knees shaking. But there is a warm, solid presence behind him, keeping him on his feet. “She is giving you the ultimate gift. Forgiveness. You would be _foolish_ to throw that in her face… as I once did with my own kin.” Hanzo murmurs, and Jesse… laughs because _yeah._

He was pulling a classic Hanzo Shimada by deeming himself unworthy, throwing away an impossible chance. 

“Yer buddy’s a real smart cookie.” Haseya remarks and Jesse laughs, feeling a strong hand grip his own. 

“Yeah, he’s a real firecracker. Quick as a whip.” Jesse says fondly.

The cowboy takes a slow, deep breath, and looks his sister in the eyes. She smiles back at him, and he’s sure the grin on his face is as big as hers. 

Haseya opens her arms just enough and Jesse gets the picture, the invitation. Jesse hands his hat off to Hanzo and takes Haseya into his arms. Her hair smells like cigar smoke and sandalwood, familiar scents that mirror is own. Nothing like the clean detergent smells that followed Hanzo and Genji, a scent that never followed a Shimada but lived on a McCree.

He presses his face into her shoulder and shudders as hands grip the back of his shirt and holds him closer.

“I’m so sorry-” Jesse sobs and the hands rub over his back, squeeze him, comfort him, “Why didn’t- you knew where I was why didn’t-?” 

“It’s complicated, Jess’... you ever just mean to do somethin’ but get wrapped up in all different things and before ya know it, yer livin’ a different life an’ ya don’t really know what to do anymore?” Haseya murmurs and Jesse laughs, nodding against her. 

“More than ya know, Hay-Hay.” 

Jesse wonders if he’s said something wrong when she lets out a quiet cry and clings to him. 

“Hay- oh… s’okay, Hay-Hay. S’okay, sis’. Got you. Got us. Nothin’s separatin’ the McCree’s again. Don’t you worry. Ain’t no reason for us to worry.” 

“We’re together.” Haseya murmurs and Jesse breathes freely. The sun sinks well below the cliffs before either one of them lets go.

 

\----

 

Jesse looks up at the porch, hesitant to come forward and walk up those familiar steps. They’ve been repaired, as much was clear from the patchwork of wood and paint colours, but the love was there in each nail. 

“Took me awhile… once I started takin’ out members of Deadlock it gave me a lil’ sway with the town. Got power and water turned back on… after a while.” 

“How long…?” Jesse asks. 

“Couple years, I guess? Like campin’.” Haseya assures, darting a hand out in front of Jesse as he steps forward, “Whoa there cowboy!” 

“What?” 

“Look near your feet.” Hanzo instructs, stepping over a raised line in the sand, “  Explosives?” 

“Ashe’s a dumb bitch but the first time I blew the leg off one of her men she knew not to come round no more. Watch for raised bits of sand and don’t ever try to get in the door without the key. You break it open it’s gonna shatter in yer face.” 

“God yer smart.” Jesse sighs. On the entire walk to Haseya’s truck, and the quiet drive to the house, he’d been unable to stop staring at her. She’d seen him of course, but didn’t say a word so he hadn’t stopped. His baby sister-

There’s the click of a key in a lock and Haseya pushes the door open. Jesse goes to follow but sees that Hanzo remains still. 

“You comin’, Darlin’?” 

“You two need to speak without an audience. I will remain outside, reflect on what has happened. Alert the base we are well, without giving details.” 

“I ain’t gonna make you stay outside.” Jesse scoffs and leans into the hand that presses to his cheek, “Quit bein’ silly.” 

“It is not ‘silly’. It is what you both deserve. When you are finished come get me… Jesse I am happy for you. I know that this gift is overwhelming and your emotions are scattered but you are _lucky_.”

“I know, Han’. I’m real lucky. Havin’ you, havin’ H-Haseya-” It’s so strange to say her name and know she’s _here, “-_ I’m the luckiest man alive.” Jesse tilts his head and kisses Hanzo’s palm. Once. Twice. Three times before Hanzo pulls away and shoos him toward the door. 

“Go. Be with her.” 

Jesse turns toward the house and takes a very deep breath. He adjusts the hat on his head, fiddles with the edge of his serape, and pulls up his pants by his belt. 

“Jesse McCree never backs down… even if he’s scared shitless.” 

He walks up the steps, smiling as they squeak beneath his feet. When he passes the threshold he feels as if he’s been thrown back in time. Back before Overwatch, Blackwatch, his bounty, being on the run, Deadlock -

Like he’d come in from playing and Haseya was waiting for him by the stairs, wanting to see her big brother before she had to go to bed. She’d come up to his chest, with cute hair done up in pigtails and a serape around her shoulders that fell all the way to the floor. 

Now she stands there at the steps, clothes fitting properly and hair in a single braid falling down her back. She was no longer a girl, she was a woman who lived a life as hard as his own and it was clear in her posture. She’d taken the scabbard off her back and laid it against the wall, but Jesse suspects she doesn’t need a shotgun to do damage. 

“Alright, now you gonna keep starin’ or you gonna come see what I’ve done to the place?” She teased and McCree chuckles, walking toward the steps. 

“Everythin’ looks the same… furniture, floors, walls.” 

“Lots of stuff was left alone, couch, blankets - did a lil’ upstairs. Too many memories in the rooms.” 

The room where their mother died, the room that Haseya had been kidnapped from -

Jesse follows Haseya up the steps. She pushes open the first door - his own room - and he feels like a kid again, smaller than he already felt so often when confronted with his past. The posters on the wall have been faded by sun, along with the paint on the walls. The flooring was still the bare barn wood, but there was a new carpet covering the majority of it. The rug was the colour of the sunrise, with pinks, purples, and oranges that seemed to blend together to form the scene. He kicks off his boots near the door and walks inside, stepping on the wool. 

“Looks like somethin’ mama woulda’ made.” He whispers. 

“It does, but it ain’t hers. S’mine. Needed a hobby outside of smokin’.” 

“ You too, huh?” Jesse chuckles, kneeling down and petting the rug, “Ever had Pardon’s eighty-year cigarillos?” 

“That cost more than forty cents or a butt off the sidewalk?” 

Jesse laughs, getting to his feet and stroking his hand over the neatly made bed, “Gonna get Hanzo to buy ya some, ya won’t be able to go back,” Jesse mused as he admired the patterns on the quilts before turning back to Haseya, “What about your room?” 

“Same sorta stuff, bigger rug. No dumb posters.” Haseya jokes and Jesse grins, goes to playfully shove her but stops short, putting his hands in his pockets. 

Haseya reaches out, grasps him by his metal wrist and McCree only flinches a bit. 

“Ain’t gonna break me.” 

“I did once.” 

“Hurt, not broken.” Haseya corrects, pulling him by the wrist, out of his room and toward the next down the hall. 

Unlike his, Jesse doesn’t recognize Haseya’s room. The walls are a new colour and the floor is mostly covered by wool rugs. The bed is high with pillows and blankets, complementing the room in neutral, warm tones.

The wooden desk in the corner is covered in cigar butts, wool, knitting needles and rug hooking supplies. A journal is laid open on the desk and as tempted as he is, he turns away from the messy scrawl. 

“Made yourself a real cute lil’ room. I like it.” 

“ We.. ain’t gotta go see the other room. Didn’t make it much different. You can check it later, if ya wanna.” Haseya sits down on the bed, pats the space next to herself. 

McCree sits, picking up a small plush cactus and poking the squishy character, “S’cute.” 

“Mmm, yeah he is. Jess’-” Haseya takes a breath and then begins to remove the serape from her shoulder, slides off the duster. 

“Hay-Hay, you ain’t gotta- “ Jesse feels bile rising in his throat as she lifts the hem of her shirt. Jesse wants to hide from the reality, continue to bask in his euphoria and not the harsh reality of what he’s done.

He honors her by looking.

Across her side is a puckered scar that’s larger than that of a normal gunshot wound, like the bullet hole had been torn apart and prodded before being fixed. He had a few gunshot wounds of his own and none were so severe. “What happened, I don’t understand, I didn’-” 

“No, you didn’. Here-” Haseya grabs his flesh wrist and pulls the glove off his hand, forcibly presses his hand to the scar so he can feel the ridges. His hand trembles against her skin.

“ I wanna tell ya what happened. S’gonna be a lil’ long-winded. Sure yer fella is alright outside?”

Jesse clears his throat, strokes his thumb over the scar, “His name's Hanzo. He ain't stupid, sure he'll come inside if he really wants'ta.” 

Haseya takes a breath and squeezes his hand, letting it drop away and pulling her shirt down. “I never died, Jess’. I crawled out of the desert.”

 

\----

 

_Her eyes close and she hears her brother say, “I love you, Haseya. More than anythin’.”_

_“L-Love you too, Jesse. Are we gonna get to go home?”_

_“... yeah. Yeah, home soon.”_ _  
_

_Haseya knows deep in her heart she isn’t going to see her home again. She knows that Jesse has no choice. If he doesn’t Ashe is going to-_ _  
_

_Her eyes snap open and her vision goes white as he feels her side catch fire. She’s silent as she falls down against the sand. Then she realizes. She’s been shot. She screams._ _  
_

_Haseya hears Jesse yelling and watches unfocused as her brother is forced into the truck and taken away, leaving her there to die and rot away like the body next to her._ _  
_

_Moving in and out of consciousness, Haseya is unsure how much time passes. The heat of the midday sun is rising and she knows it’ll either be the gunshot or dehydration that kills her first._ _  
_

_“If you’re going out this afternoon don’t forget your water, Hay-Hay. It’s supposed to be hot.”/ More tears spill down Haseya’s cheeks and wash away some of the sand that had stuck there._ _  
_

_“Jesse…”_ _  
_

_Looking up into the sky the sun is blinding, directly overhead. She tries to close her eyes against the onslaught but they remain open even though they burn, sizzle in the desert heat._ _  
_

_Her tears dry and her fingers twitch against the dirt and then something /snaps/._ _  
_

_She jolts upright, coughing and holding her hands over her side._ _  
_

_She wouldn’t have been able to see then but there’s red rings around each of her irises._ _  
_

_The will to survive possesses her and she scrambles before the energy fades. She’s still bleeding and Haseya rips the expensive shirt off the dead boy’s back, winding it around her waist._ _  
_

_“I’m s-sorry.” She breathes, knowing he will never be buried._ _  
_

_She’s unable to get to her feet but she manages to crawl and with no direction in mind she uses each ounce of her strength to pull herself through the sand. It scrapes against her body and the earth leaves her bleeding and bruised. The wound on her side_ _doesn’t close, if anything it pulls and gets bigger._ _  
_

_There’s a voice in the back of her head but she can’t truly hear it or understand it. She just knows she has to keep going..._ _  
_

_But then Haseya knows she can’t make it any farther. The sun is setting and she sees nothing in the distance. She would freeze tonight as the temperature drops._ _  
_

_“Jesse… please._ _Por favor déjame vivir, quiero vivir. Please come back.”_ _  
_

_\----_

 

_Haseya wakes to the sound of beeping machinery. Her eyes snap open and she sits up, only to be pushed back by the nurse attending her._ _  
_

_“Easy! Lay back, querida. You are at the hospital. You’ve been shot. Do you know who shot you?”_

_“No.” Haseya croaks, dropping her head back against the pillow._ _  
_

_It hadn’t been Jesse’s fault, she wouldn’t do that to him. Maybe he’d be able to get away from Deadlock. Maybe she could find him-_ _  
_

_“A couple out horseback riding found you just in time. Can you tell me your name?”_ _  
_

_“Haseya McCree.”_ _  
_

_“Do you have any family, Haseya?”_ _  
_

_Haseya squeezes her eyes shut tightly and shakes her head. They couldn’t be allowed to find Jesse and it didn’t take long for the cops to go to their house and realize both the parents had been deceased. They suspected Jesse, of course, but she would never give him up. It hadn’t been his fault._

 

_\----_

 

_When she’s discharged from the hospital the cops take her to a foster home in La Cruces, too far away from her home in Santa Fe for the ten year-old to try and run back. She’s trapped in a bungalow with far too many children and parents who were clearly in it for the tax return fostering gave them._ _  
_

_She shares her room with five other girls who are much older and keen to make her life a living hell. At least she didn’t have any personal belongings to steal but they found other ways to make her miserable. Like taking her dinner - if bread and butter could really be counted as dinner - and mocking her for the scar that covered her side._ _  
_

_It hadn’t healed well. What could have been a relatively small gunshot wound was now the size of an orange. Crawling through the desert had stretched the wound and it had been so infected by the debris skin had to be cut away, causing the wound to heal puckered and jagged._ _  
_

_“Freak. Yer daddy do that? Bring ya out to pasture like the useless bitch ya are and shoot’cha?”_ _  
_

_Haseya flinches as the plate she’s holding is knocked from her hands and falls to the floor, shattering._ _  
_

_“Mama! Haseya broke /another/ plate. She must think we’re made’a money! Spoiled brat!”_ _  
_

_Haseya became used to the sound of a belt hitting flesh, just as quickly as she learned to stand up for herself._ _  
_

_There was no violence in the McCree household other than the violence others had inflicted on them. Even if they could be short with one another they’d been a family. This foster home wasn’t a family, it was a constant battle to make it out on top._ _  
_

_Valerie Garcia learned pretty quickly not to knock another plate out of Haseya McCree’s hands because she woke up without any hair on her head the next morning. Every single lash Haseya had gotten had been worth it. The pain was nothing to her when she’d already lost everything._

 

 _\----_ _  
_ _At thirteen Haseya is watching Valerie and Sofia wrestle for the remote. They’re both approaching eighteen and Haseya is waiting for them to be kicked to the curb when they no longer bring in any money. The television ends up flicking through a few channels before settling on the news when the control slides under the worn sofa. With the target gone the teenagers focus more on pulling at each others hair, leaving Haseya to stare blankly at the newscaster._ _  
_

_“_ _Weather for tomorrow is HOT so don’t forget to drink lots of water and wear your suncree-” She reaches up and touches her earpiece, “We have breaking news, Las Cruces. Our sources tell us that the global peacekeeping organization, Overwatch, is on scene now in Deadlock Gorge, Sante Fe. It seems as though they’ve raided the base of the infamous Deadlock Gang and are detaining members now, including wanted criminals such as Emmanuel Alvarez, John ‘Butch’ Martinez, Catherine Santiago, Je-”_ _  
_

_The channel changes and Haseya jumps to her feet, turning on Valerie who’s holding the remote and looking victorious. She raises an eyebrow at her._ _  
_

_“What? I won.”_ _  
_

_“Change it back right now.”_ _  
_

_“Why?” Valarie grins, getting to her feet and holding the remote high over her head._ _  
_

_“Cause I was watchin’ the news. I ain’t playin’ games wit’cha, Valerie. Change the channel back to the news before I make ya.”_ _  
_

_“How ‘bout this? You gimme a kiss and I’ll change it right back.”_ _  
_

_“Oh, I’ll give ya a kiss alright. Close yer eyes, Val’.” Haseya says sweetly, batting her eyelashes up at her_ _  
_

_Like a fool she closes his eyes and puckers her lips for her awaited ‘kiss’. Haseya gives it to her too, right between the eyes with her fist._

_As Valarie curses Haseya takes the remote and turns it back to the news. They’re already finished with their news about the Deadlock Gang and a series of anniversary and birthday wishes were being announced._ _  
_

_“Shit.”_

_“Mama! Haseya punched me /and/ said shit! What’cha gonna do about it!?”_

_“Haseya McCree! You come in here this instant, young lady, I’m gonna tan yer hide!”_

 

_\----_

 

_Haseya was determined to learn everything possible about the Deadlock Gang. At the local library she’d been able to find a recording of that broadcast and they hadn’t ended up saying Jesse’s name, but she also couldn’t find a mention of him anywhere else._

_She was desperate to see if her brother had been arrested or killed by the Overwatch raid._ _  
_

_She was starting to get frustrated the third time she’s there, using the ancient mac to scroll through the arrests and obituaries in Santa Fe. Sofia is getting frustrated too, tapping her foot against the ground behind Haseya._ _  
_

_“I know I said I’d take ya here fer punchin’ Val’ in the face but this is the /third time/, kid. If ya haven’t found what’cher lookin’ for that’s it. There’s only so many dirty mags I can flip through before I get bored.”_ _  
_

_“Gimme five more minutes and we’ll get goin’.”_ _  
_

_“Five’s all ya got.” Sofia grumbles, continuing to tap her foot and wait, watching the clock on the wall._ _  
_

_Haseya’s five minutes tick by faster than she would have liked and she rises to her feet, hope draining from her. Sofia can clearly she she’s frustrated but it still shocks Haseya when she feels a gentle hand on her shoulder._ _  
_

_“Whatever it is - whoever it is - it ain’t worth it. Don’t keep lettin’ it get you in trouble. Val’s still in the house fer another eight months and she’ll kick yer ass yet.”_ _  
_

_“I ain’t afraid of ‘er. She’s a fuckin’ halfwit and I’ll kick ‘er ass.” Haseya grumbles, slouching even more when Sofia laughs and ruffles her hair._ _  
_

_“Don’t say I didn’ warn ya, kid.”_ _  
_

_Haseya grumbles and doesn’t say much on their way back to the house._ _  
_

_Maybe Sofia was right, even if Jesse had been killed or taken in by Overwatch she doubted the organization would announce they involvement in killing - or recruiting - a seventeen year-old. Haseya smiles a bit, looking out the passenger window of Sofia’s old, beat up Honda Civic._ _  
_

_Jesse would be turning eighteen this year too._ _  
_

_‘I’ll find ya, Jess’.’ Haseya thinks, ‘I’m still out here.’_

 

_\----_

 

_Haseya is sitting cross-legged on the living room floor, working her long, dark hair into braids. The house is silent, their ‘parents’ at work and the rest of the kids having gone - snuck - out for the evening. She wasn’t past sneaking out and bumming smokes or alcohol off the older kids who hung around downtown, but tonight she wanted to be alone._ _  
_

_It was four-years to the day that Jesse had shot her and it put a lot in perspective. She wasn’t an angel, far from the child that Jesse needed to project, but she was still a kid the same age now that he had been then._ _  
_

_She’s pretty smart, whip-quick and able to get herself out of pretty nasty situations. Just the other day, when Allie had finally noticed her lipstick missing, Haseya was quick to tuck the tube under Valerie’s pillow where it would easily be found. Dumbasses hadn’t even realized she’d been wearing the colour when they’d both gotten into a catfight and been given a hefty lashing for it._ _  
_

_Lipstick and girl fights was one thing, being forced at gunpoint to kill your only living relative was another. She’d probably have done the same if their roles were reversed._ _  
_

_Haseya carefully ties a ribbon at the end of one of her braids and sighs, turning her attention to the television that was providing ambient noise. It’s the news again just for the off chance Jesse got himself in the news._ _  
_

_“You never know.” She mumbles to herself,_ _staring as the newscaster cuts to a conference in Geneva._ _  
_

_“United Nation Medals of Honor are being awarded to Overwatch members for their continued service in the protection of our lives during the Omnic Crisis and onward. Strike Commander Jack Morrison, Commander Gabriel Reyes, Captain Ana Amari, Lieutenant Reinhardt Wilhelm, Cadet Lena Oxton, Agent Jesse McCree-”_ _  
_

_Haseya’s eyes go right to the young man standing in the back of the group. He was clean shaven and holding his cowboy hat to his chest. She could see the medal shining brightly against his breast and the proud grin spreading over his face as the rest of his team was honoured._ _  
_

_“Jess’-!” She touches the screen and calls out like he’d be able to hear her, “ Jesse, Jesse, yer okay. Oh lord, yer alright!” She hiccups as tears start streaming over her face. Her newly braided hair is becoming damp with the waterfall that rolls down her cheeks._ _  
_

_She wonders who she could call, how she could get ahold of Jesse- Then she sees the shot of the team standing together, Commander Reyes’ arm around Jesse’s shoulders and nods. He was where he needed to be. She’d do something just as great and make him proud!_ _  
_

_Looking around the dreary living room she isn’t sure what she could accomplish in a place like this… but she’d find something!_ _  
_

_After watching the conference Haseya’s part of the room becomes /covered/ in vintage Overwatch posters that she’s ripped off walls in town where they hadn’t been vandalized. Her most precious photo is the newspaper clipping of Commander Reyes and Jesse that she keeps tucked into her boot during the day and under her mattress at night. She finally had a piece of Jesse back and wasn’t about to let that go._ _  
_

 

_\----_

 

_“Freeloadin’ bitch! Why don’t’cha do somethin’ useful like get a job!? Why should I have to feed yer ungrateful yap?!”_ _  
_

_“Wouldn’t need ta worry if ya didn’t use my government check on booze, ya ol’ hag!” Haseya ducks out the front door of the house and hears something smash against the wall inside. She huffs and pulls a Cigarillo from her boot, lighting it with a match that was tucked in beside it. She’s the only kid left in the house and with her ‘parents’ track record it wasn’t a surprise no one else was getting assigned here. It meant the sixteen year-old made a great punching bag for all the frustrations that came with suddenly not having an income._ _  
_

_“Wonder what they’ll do once I’m gone.” Haseya mumbles, a satisfied grin slipping onto her lips. The thought made her even more determined to follow through with her plan. She only needed a few hundred more bucks to get a flight to Geneva. If she could get to the Swiss Overwatch headquarters she knew she’d be able to find Jesse._ _  
_

_Jesse’s not in the news too often. It seemed like whatever division he was a part of kept a low profile and she thought that suited her brother. He was never one for the spotlight, despite his flashy garb. Jesse had always just wanted to be comfortable._ _  
_

_“Won’t be long now. Jus’ gotta win a few more games and I’ll have enough. I’ll get to ya, Jess’” She stubs out her cigarillo of the rail of the porch and tucks the stub back into her boot._ _  
_

_Haseya looks over into their neighbours yard where the couple’s young son is under his car fixing something while the radio blared. A shitty pop song fades out and the host begins to speak._ _  
_

_“A warrant for the arrest of Elizabeth Caledonia ‘Calamity’ Ashe has been issued in Sante Fe, New Mexico. It is believed that Ashe is the de facto leader of the Deadlock Gang following the near destruction of the gang by Overwatch almost three years ago. If you see Elizabeth Caledonia ‘Calamity’ Ashe the authorities advise you do not engage and report to them immediately.”_

_“Sonuvabitch!” Haseya shouts, watching as the kid startles and bangs his head off the underside if the car._

_“Fuck!”_

_“Sorry!” She grimaces and ducks inside the house, running down the hall to her room. She hears her ‘mom’ shouting but doesn't listen, barricading the door with her rickety old dresser.  She digs through it and grabs her cash, ID, and double checks that the newspaper clipping is still in her boot along with the remains of her smoke. She looks at the door for only a second before heading to her window and hopping out, something she has done many times._ _  
_

_It doesn’t take long for her to walk to the bus station and lay her ID and some cash on the counter for the attendant, “Next bus to Sante Fe, please.”_ _  
_

_The teenager boredly prints a ticket and slides it across the counter, pointing down the terminal driveway to where a bus is sitting, “Leaves in three. Don’t miss it. No refunds.”_ _  
_

_“Don’t plan to.” Haseya assures, picking up her ticket and walking quickly toward the bus. By the time she takes her seat and gets settled the bus rolls out of the lot._

_She doesn’t say goodbye or farewell to La Cruces. The six years here had just been a stop in her life, putting her on the track back home to Sante Fe. She isn’t sure what her plan as she watches the town rush by but Haseya knows one thing._ _  
_

_Elizabeth Ashe’s life is about to get a lot more complicated._

 

_\----_

 

_It was clear the bank never bothered reselling the McCree homestead, if the rotten porch and smashed windows were any indication. Haseya carefully navigates the porch so she doesn’t fall through and pushes the old screen door open. A cloud of dusts greets her and she coughs, stepping inside._ _  
_

_The house had been raided which wasn’t a surprise, their farm hadn’t been in the best part of the city. Lots of gangs used their part of the desert as a throughway for their crimes._ _  
_

_Haseya walks through the living room, seeing that the old quilt their mother made was still laying over the sofa. She ignores the kitchen and other downstairs rooms in favour of going upstairs. The first room on the right was Jesse’s and she’s drawn there, nudging the ajar door all the way open._ _  
_

_The walls of Jesse’s room were covered in old western posters that were slightly ripped now and the cacti sitting on his dresser were rotted away to nothing. Haseya slowly enters the space and stops at the dresser, opening it up and smiling down at the contents. There’s a collection of the serapes that McCree liked to wear and to her delight, an extra hat. She pulls out the old suede cowboy hat and perches it on her head. Then she carefully leafs through the serapes until she finds one that’s a sandy brown colour with turquoise detailing,  and throws it over her shoulders. She breathes in the scent of home and tears prickle at her eyes. It’d really been six years…_

_The next room is her own. It had been where she was hiding when Deadlock had shown up and drug her out into the desert to be killed. Haseya looks under the bed and thinks she probably wouldn’t even fit under there now if she needed to hide. She wouldn’t be hiding anymore, though. It wouldn’t be long before someone noticed the house was occupied and they’d be at her door._ _  
_

_Maybe they’d give her some space at first but eventually they’d come demanding what she had. That’s what had happened with her father._ _  
_

_The homestead had been a profitable farm when she’d been a child, then gang activity began to rise. Deadlock and other roughians started running the area and many didn’t dare come out to the farm anymore. They’d been generous though, offering her father loans to keep the his dying livelihood afloat. Loans with interest so high he’d never be able to pay them back. He’d paid in the end, with his own life. They’d done a driveby and shot him dead out in the field._ _  
_

_Before that Haseya and McCree had been home schooled by their mother who taught them booksmarts, while their father would take them out in the barns and fields and show them the ropes of farming. When he passed Mrs.McCree didn’t have time to teach her children anymore. All of her energy was put into keeping food on the table. It ended with her selling all of their animals and working the fields well into the night._ _  
_

_Whether it was the stress and exhaustion of running the farm or the heartbreak of losing her husband, Mrs.McCree began to fail. They’d had no more family, and certainly no money, so when she became bedridden it was clear to both Jesse and Haseya things were going to go downhill fast._ _  
_

_Haseya had been told to stay outside but she hadn’t, instead pressing her ear to the door of her mother’s bedroom and listening._ _  
_

_“When I pass you have to go into town on the bike with Haseya and go to the cops. Do you understand, Jesse?”_ _  
_

_“I hate the cops. They don’t do shit, mama. Why would we go there?”_ _  
_

_Haseya had heard the quiet sobs of her mother, weak and fading._ _  
_

_“Because we don’t have anyone else, Jess’. No money, no family, no way to keep you and Haseya safe. You have to go to them and they’ll find you a home. Promise me, Mijo. I’m sorry I have to do this to you but promise me.”_ _  
_

_“... I promise.” Jesse sniffs and Haseya had looked in through the crack in the door. Jesse was kneeling at the bedside and holding their mother’s hand. She was so pale now, no longer the strong, sun-kissed woman she had been._ _  
_

_“That’s a good boy… go get Haseya. I don’t think I have much longer.”_ _  
_

_Haseya doesn’t remember much after that. Jesse had buried her out in the field and gotten their belongings and loaded them onto the bike. The drive there and the walk up to the police station was fuzzy. Everything came back into focus for Haseya when she remembered the girl outside the station who spoke to them._ _  
_

_“Ya’ll look sad. What’cha in for?”_ _  
_

_“That ain’t none of yer business.” Jesse had spit and she’d laughed._ _  
_

_“You got parents?”_ _  
_

_Jesse had let go of Haseya’s hand and pinned her up against the brick, “What’s that supposed to mean?”_ _  
_

_“You goin’ in there with yer lil’ sis hopin’ to get into foster care? They’re gonna separate ya. Keep you here and send her all the way out to Boston for all you know.”_ _  
_

_“You don’t know that!”_ _  
_

_“Did you wanna risk it? Or… did’ja wanna come with me and meet people who’ll get’cha money and keep ya together?”_ _  
_

_“... for real?”_ _  
_

_“For real. I’m Ashe. Jus’ follow me on that bike’a yours and you won’t have another thing to worry ‘bout.”_ _  
_

_Haseya shakes her head as she walks past her mother’s room and goes right to the end of the hall. They never should have listened to Ashe, but she understands why Jesse had. She’d been his only family and without her he’d have been alone. Haseya reaches up and grabs the latch to the attic, pulling it open. A rope ladder falls down and she climbs it carefully, thankful it doesn’t break beneath her weight._ _  
_

_The attic is small but at the back corner there’s a pile of boxes. She throws them to the side and finds what she’s really looking for. The gun locker._

_She finds the key up in the rafters and unlocks it, relief flooding through her when she sees that all the weapons are still there._ _  
_

_There’s a couple pellet guns, an old .22 and the one Haseya had been looking for. She lifts up the lever-action rifle and licks her lips. She hadn’t been around guns much as a kid and the last time she’d seen a gun like this it had shot her. Suffice to say she’s nervous, but when she thinks about Elizabeth Ashe being on the other end…_ _  
_

_“We could’a been a family if it weren’t for you meddlin’ in our buisness, takin’ advantage of Jesse. You ain’t gonna get the run of Sante Fe. Not if I got anythin’ to say about it.”_

 

_\----_

 

_Reload. Shoot. Miss. Reload. Shoot. Miss. Reload. Shoot. Miss._

_The days are a constant repeat of this. Haseya stands beneath the hot sun and tries to make sense of how the rifle feels in her grasp. She isn't making much progress._ _  
_

_“Fuck!” Haseya snarls, tossing the rifle to the ground in front of her makeshift beer can targets. Not even the wind was knocking them over. Each of her bullets were a little to the left and not hitting their mark. She’d never be able to take Deadlock down if she couldn’t even shoot straight._ _  
_

_Jesse had been a natural shot, helping her father kill and butcher the cattle. She hadn’t been old enough to help so she’d never learned like she had been meant to. There were a lot of things she had been meant to do, things that should have happened. Helping with the harvest in the fall, butchering the cattle and bringing them to market, living with her family-_ _  
_

_She picks up the rifle again and cocks the lever, aiming at the middle can. She takes a deep breath. In. Out. In. Out._ _  
_

_The air grows heavy and hot around her, time slowing down as it waits for her shot._ _  
_

_Her eyes snaps open and Haseya squeezes the trigger._ _  
_

_All three cans fall and slowly she makes her way up to them. Each had a neat bullet hole going in through one side and out the other. She knew her rifle didn’t have a built in magazine and only held one bullet._ _  
_

_“How…?” She loads the rifle, turns on her heel and breathes. When she fires again she takes out one of the single porch lights, shattering the old bulb completely - not that it had been lit. Suddenly the gun feels a lot more comfortable in her grip and she doesn’t miss anymore of her shots. She isn’t sure she can miss._ _  
_

_Looking up at the sun sitting high in the sky she grins. Her mother had once told her the story of a god who sacrificed himself in fire so that the sun could continue to shine. “Thank you, Nanahuatzin.” It had been under the burning of the high noon sun that she had snapped back to life and given the will to persevere. All that strength hadn’t just been from her. Haseya had been helped._ _  
_

_“I'll make this life worth it. I won't miss my second chance.”_

 

_\----_

 

_The idea of actually pulling the trigger on something more lively than a beer can or a squirrel sends Haseya’s stomach into knots. The scar maring her side is a harsh reminder of the violence the little lead bullets can do._

_It's left her stagnant, scared to pull the trigger and reluctant to track down Ashe or Deadlock - lest she put herself in harm's way._

_She spins a shell between her fingertips, listening to the howling of wolves and the singing of crickets. Such a little thing can cause so much pain, tear so many people apart-_ _  
_

_Haseya hears a branch snap to her right and lifts up the shotgun up, turning on the porch swing just enough. It’s hard to see in the setting sun with no electricity to aid her but she makes out the shadow._ _  
_

_“Y-You get yerself outta ‘ere before I pull the trigger. I ain’t givin’ ya another warnin’.”_ _  
_

_“Well ain’t that cute.” A man drawls, “A lil’ lady squattin’ in the old McCree homestead. Can’t be from ‘round ‘ere everyone knows this place belongs to Deadlock.” He steps into the light and Haseya sees a glint of a skull belt buckle._

_“I am a McCree. I'm the only one who's got the right to be here. Get while the gettin's good.” She works the bolt on the gun, finger hovering over the trigger. They tremble._

_He raises his own gun and Haseya is thrown back in time. She's no longer the runaway that's been living in a derelict house by herself for two years. She's a young girl with pigtail braids looking down the barrel at her brother._

_It’s enough to scare her, anger her, cause her to pull the trigger._ _  
_

_Hell, she can’t miss._ _  
_

_The man falls to the ground with a bullet between his eyes and the ringing echoes through Haseya’s head. It wasn’t a beer can, or a nasty squirrel coming in to chew wires… he’d been a human being._ _  
_

_A Deadlock member through and through, if the outfit and tattoos were any indication._ _  
_

_She rolls up her sleeves and drags the body out into the desert, knowing the Mexican grey wolves should make quick work of the man._ _  
_

_When Haseya returns to the homestead she heats water from the old well over their woodstove and scrubs her flesh clean until all the blood is gone, but her skin is now red with the severity of her cleaning instead of the evidence of her murder._

_“... is this how you felt, Jesse?” Haseya wipes at her eyes, feeling wetness across her cheeks. She hadn’t known the man and she felt grief, Haseya can't imagine killing a loved one._ _  
_

_Was it murder anyway? He was a Deadlock member, a disease on society. Her mind spins back to the moment where Ashe said, ‘Shoot’er or I will’, and any remorse leaves Haseya’s soul. The tears that spill for her actions cease and she sits in front of the fire light, cleaning the barrel of her gun._ _  
_

_It was killed or be killed, and Haseya wasn’t hiding anymore._ _  
_

_The encounter with her first Deadlock member had a domino effect on Haseya’s determination. If Deadlock was there, so was Haseya, waiting in the shadows to fire a bullet in the chaos and give the gang an extra casualty, sometimes two._ _  
_

_A boy no older than her, bullet between the shoulders at a bank robbery._ _  
_

_An old man with graying hair and confederate flags on his leather jacket, a bullet in the liver while hijacking a train._ _  
_

_Two women who looked shockingly like Ashe, a bullet in the back of each of their heads when they parked their bikes outside the local dive._ _  
_

_If anyone wore the emblem of Deadlock they were on Haseya’s hitlist. She scoured the local newspaper for names and photos of the outlaws, keeping a list of everyone and tallying those she’d killed._

_But Deadlock were like a hydra, cut off the head and two took its place. Shoot a dirty biker and before you know it Deadlock has more unfamiliar faces._ _  
_

_Haseya pulled her serape over her head as she slid into the local library, moving to occupy one of the small computer cubicles to check the news. She meant to always check local but she couldn’t help but be pulled in by the global newscast, looking for any news of Overwatch’s exploits._

_‘Overwatch(?) Assassination in Rialto. Blackwatch, the Darkside of Overwatch. Commander Gabriel Reyes charged with-’_

_Haseya scrolls quickly through the article, searching for the only name she cares about-_

_‘The mission roster included Agent Jesse McCree-’_

_Haseya swallows and presses print on the article.  She stands to retrieve it and is pushed down by her shoulders.  She goes still._

_“Haseya McCree?”_

_“Sorry sir, you have the wrong person. That ain't my name.” She says sweetly, tries to stand but is forced down again._

_“Ain't here to play games. You ain't livin’ in yer foster parents house no more. Child services showed up an’ saw ya checked out.”_

_“Child services needs to get it's shit together.  I’m twenty-four. Hope they ain't been givin’ those bastards money for eight years, I'd be askin’ for a refund. Ain't fraud a crime?”_

_“No worse than murder.”_

_Haseya swings behind herself but the cop grabs her arm, twists it behind her back and pushes her face down into the table of the cubicle._

_She hears the click of handcuffs and curses, dread coursing through her veins as she's pulled away and thrown into the back of a cruiser._

 

_\----_

 

_“This is my house.” Haseya states, being pushed up the front steps, “Ain't ya takin’ me to prison?”_

_“This is the county's house.” The cop - Sheriff Daniels, according to his badge - corrects._

_Haseya didn't like that one bit and pulls against his hold, “This is the McCree homestead! Ya ain't got a fuckin’ right to it!”_

_He shoves her in through the door and sits her on the sofa, “If you stow the attitude for a hot sec’ you'll know I'm offerin’ ya a deal.”_

_“I don't make deals with pigs.” Haseya grunts, spitting on his boots._

_Daniels’ nose wrinkles and he pulls out a cellphone, making a call, “She needs some incentive. Turn it on.”_

_Haseya squints as the lights in the house turn on and she leans back into the sofa, “That's nice. Can't pay for it. Don't get what yer showin’ me.”_

_“We turned the electricity on and can have someone out to fix the water. If you've been here since ya ran away that's an awful long time without runnin’ water. Ain't lookin’ for you to pay… lookin’ for you to keep doin’ what yer doin’.” When he leans over to unlock her cuffs Haseya gets to her feet and steps away the moment their off._

_“Got more important things to worry ‘bout then smelling like flowers. A lil’ campin’ never hurt no one… and what? Killin’ guys?” She asks, standing behind the couch and rubbing at her wrists._

_“Deadlock's a fuckin’ curse in New Mexico. There's nothin’ we can do, nothin’  we've been able to do. Can't go ‘round killin'em. Thought with Overwatch comin’ in it'd be fixed but we weren't so lucky.”_

_Haseya sees now how young this man is. She had always been aware of the corruption surrounding Santa Fe and all of New Mexico. She can't imagine struggling with the law to try to protect people. The weight of that was held heavily on his shoulders._

_“I can't shoot the bastards but you can. We'll cover it up, keep your lights and water on in exchange… I know you have more reason then most to hate Deadlock.”_

_“Don't know what yer talkin’ ‘bout and we ain't gonna talk ‘bout it no more... ain't like I can really say no tho’. “ She comes around the couch and offers him her hand, “Haseya McCree… I'll do my best to kill Deadlock.”_ _  
_

_Daniels takes a breath and shakes her hand, she grabs his hand back tightly, a warning- ‘do not cross me’._ _  
_

_“Thank you for doin’ business, Ms. McCree.”_ _  
_

_“It’s just ‘McCree’. Pleasure workin’ with ya, Sheriff.”_ _  
_

_\----_

 

_“You realize you gotta actually kill Ashe or none of this matters, right?” Daniels only slightly flinches when she shoots down a row of cans across the yard._

_“When I shoot at Ashe, B.O.B jumps in the way. Nothin’ can come within of a foot of Ashe without him protecting her and no matter how many bullets I pump into the bot he doesn't drop!” She grunts, propping her weapon on the side of the porch and pulling her gloves off. She tosses them at him and he catches them, setting them down on the step._

_“So you've said… but the mayor's gettin’ antsy. Wonders if we should really be payin’ ya if we ain't gettin’ results.”_

_Haseya scoffs, sitting on the edge of the porch,”Y'all don't fuckin' pay me and I'm real sure it don't cost much to keep the lights on.”_

_“It's a cost-benefit analysis, Hase- McCree.”_

_Haseya frowns at his slipup. She never wanted to let anyone close to her, not until her mission was done and she's reunited with Jesse.  She couldn't allow herself to be distracted by friends, no matter how kind they've been to her._

_Daniel's - Luke Daniels - was a kind sheriff, brought Haseya anything she needed, but he was naive. He saw the good in everything, believed that law would bring people to justice. With forty-two Deadlock kills notched on her gun barrel Haseya has a firm belief in vigilante justice._

_“Unless you got a way to take out B.O.B. get off my property.” Haseya grumbles, picking up her gun._

_“I actually do. Not by my own choice.” When Haseya picks up on the hesitancy in his voice she raises her weapon once more and points it to the space next to Daniels. She’d thought she'd seen something, a flicker in the sun, a mirage._

_“McCree. Don't. She can help.”_

_“She can help if you keep up your end of our deal.” From the mirage a woman comes into view, as if a cloak of invisibility has been peeled back. Haseya cocks her gun and the woman laughs._

_“So scary, vaquero. I'm shaking in my boots.” She grins, flipping her purple hair over her shoulder._

_“This is Sombra. Sombra this is-”_

_“Haseya McCree. Born to Inesa Chooli Benally and Hampton McCree. One sibling, brother Jesse Amos McCree. Shot you when you were ten years-old. Foster care. Followed by a huge string of murders in relation to the Deadlock gan-” Sombra's description is cut shot when Haseya shoots the sand in front of her toes. She turns the gun on Daniels, feeling a hot surge of betrayal in her chest._

_“Why would you tell her!?”_

_“I didn't!” Luke promises, raising his hands up, “She knows everything! She-”_

_“Blackmailed the police department. Has the sheriff wrapped around my finger. Friends in high places. Information you could only dream of.” Sombra grins, fluttering her fingers in the air._

_“What's the endgame here?” Haseya grunts, “What's stoppin’ me from puttin’ a bullet in your brain?”_

_“I have information on Jesse.” Sombra shrugs and Haseya lowers the gun._

_“... what do I gotta do?” Haseya hates how easily she folds but there hasn't been news of Jesse for six months. No mission reports, press conferences, nothing._

_Sombra grins, stepping forward to stand beside Haseya. She gets a little too close for comfort and Haseya steps to the side as their shoulders brush._

_“I send things on the train that travels through the Gorge. On more than one occasion Ashe has decided to hijack the train. I find her to be a nuisance. Not a huge player in the game but enough to be a thorn in my side.” She passes a small black box to Haseya, “Electric Field Transmitter. Will temporarily short circuit the bot. Shouldn't cause too much long term damage but will give you time to shoot Ashe in the head.”_

_Haseya turns the box in her hand, hesitates as she considers the impact of Sombra’s cargo making it to the intended destinations. Then she thinks of Jesse and her resolve and morality crumbles._

_“I'll do it. Show me Jesse.”_

_Sombra waves her hand in the air and a hologram appears. Pictures of Jesse, one arm mechanical and looking… tired._

_Haseya reaches out and her hand passes through the screen._

_“Jesse left Blackwatch six months ago. There was an accident involving a building collapse. He lost his arm and after his rehabilitation he left the organization. Tensions have been high in Overwatch since the Venice incident and Jesse has been debating the morality of the organization and growing tired if the infighting. He now works as a bounty hunter and has slowly been gaining a bounty of his own. Won't be long before you see him in the papers I'm sure. He's currently in South America but working his way back here, I assume.”_

_Haseya feels a jolt of excitement and watches as Jesse's picture fades away from the air. She turns and grasps both of Sombra's hands, her gun falling to the ground._

_“/Gracias, Sombra/.”_

_“Recuerda nuestro trato.” Sombra says before disappearing completely._

_Haseya turns to Daniels and smiles, “Guess I got the end of a deal to hold up.”_

_Luke Daniels looks conflicted, as if he's happy Ashe will be taken care of but worried about what cargo will be delivered as a result. Like he expected her to hold up the law and morality despite everything and Haseya is sorry for him. When it comes to killing Ashe and seeing her brother again she would give /anything/._

 

_\----_

 

_Haseya sits atop the train car, looking down through a roof hatch as the screams begin and Deadlock grunts run through the cars. She wonders what Sombra - or anyone else - is shipping that makes this train such a target. But that isn’t her problem right now, her problem is the head of white hair that runs underneath the hatch with a omnic in her wake._

_When the coast is clear Haseya wrenches open the hatch against the wind and slides down onto the train car. She watches as B.O.B begins to pry open the cargo bay door with the help of the two grunts. The grunts cheer as the door opens and Haseya ruins their excitement by firing two shots and hitting them both in the head. She pulls out the little black device from her pocket and flips the switch, watching as B.O.B stands up straight for a moment before slumping over and falling to the ground. It reveals_

_Ashe, plain as day and in Haseya’s sights._ _  
_

_Ashe whirls on her, lifting her Viper and growling._ _  
_

_“/You/. Yer the one who’s been sneakin’ out the shadows and killin’ off everythin’ I built! Who the /hell/ are you?”_ _  
_

_“Shoulda’ took the shot when you had the chance, all those years ago.” Haseya hums._ _  
_

_“Don’t know what yer talkin’ ‘bout.” Ashe grunts, “I never miss. I always take a fuckin’ headshot.” Looking down at B.O.B, Ashe visibly swallows, “ … what’s the matter with him? What did you do?”_ _  
_

_“If I get my way neither of ya are gonna be functional again.”_ _  
_

_“... you’re killin’ him? What is this, revenge!?” Ashe asks, the Viper falling from her hand as she gets her hands on B.O.B’s back, “B.O.B? Wake up! B.O.B!”_ _  
_

_Haseya takes aim but- hesitates. She can see tears starting to shine in Ashe’s eyes as she shakes the omnic and tries to wake him._ _  
_

_“Come on, B.O.B! Turn him back on ya fuckin’ monster!”_ _  
_

_Haseya grits her teeth, mind racing back to the moment when Ashe so mercilessly shot her brother. When Haseya was almost her next target. Despite the rage she continues to hesitate, unable to lift the weapon once more to take aim._ _  
_

_“Yer all I got, B.O.B. /Please/.”_ _  
_

_Haseya swallows, knowing the truth of that. Ashe has given up her family, killed her brother-_ _  
_

_Haseya growls and marches over, picking Ashe up by the collar on her coat and forcing them to look eye-to-eye._ _  
_

_“My name is Haseya McCree. Jesse Amos McCree’s sister. You threatened to kill me fer your lil’ fuckin’ gang when I was ten! Ten years-old you fuckin’-” Haseya pushes her back against the cargo bay door, points a finger in Ashe’s chest. Ashe opens her mouth to speak and Haseya gives her another shove for good measure._ _  
_

_“I ain’t gonna kill you. I’m gonna let yer buddy get back up but I don’t wanna see you ever again. I don’t wanna hear ‘bout you. Find your name in the news. If you do anythin’ more than steal a pack of fuckin’ gum I’ll find you. If you try to recruit anymore Deadlock members I’ll shoot ya fuckin’ dead. There will be no more Deadlock ever again. You hear me!?”_ _  
_

_Ashe’s lips go thin and Haseya shouts, “You hear me!?”_ _  
_

_Ashe nods once, then nods more erratically._ _  
_

_“I’m sor-”_ _  
_

_“Nope.” Haseya steps back, lifts her gun once more as she pulls the device from her pocket and switches it off, “You don’t cause trouble and I’ll never use this again.”_ _  
_

_“Give it to me.” Ashe requests, helping B.O.B as the omnic slowly blinks and returns to his feet. Ashe lets him lean against her and she rubs his chest._ _  
_

_“Ain’t no way.” Haseya shakes her head and tucks the device safely away, “An’ more than anythin’ stay the fuck away from the train. Get off at the next stop.”_ _  
_

_Ashe snarled, “Fuckin’ McCrees! I’ll stay away from yer damn train! Always a pain in my ass.”_ _  
_

_Haseya laughs softly as she hops up onto a seat, goes to jump up through the roof hatch once more. Before doing so she takes a shot and it hits the wall right next to Ashe’s head._ _  
_

_“I only miss when I wanna.” Haseya warns, climbing out of the hatch and disappearing into the day. Despite not completing her mission, letting Ashe go- she feels lighter. Her mission is done with no bloodshed and she’s grateful._ _  
_

_“Fuckin’ McCrees.” She breathes._

 

_\----_

 

 _“You seen the news, vato?” Sombra asks, sitting up on top of the kitchen counter._ _  
_ _“_

_If Ashe is back in it, no. If you’re talkin’ the Swiss HQ? Why ya think I’m drinkin’?” Haseya asks, filling up a second glass of whiskey and passing it across to her._ _  
_

_“Gracias.” Sombra murmurs, taking a few sips of whiskey and sliding her hand in the air and making those holograms appear. Haseya was endlessly fascinated with the tech that Sombra carried, having never seen anything like it in person. She reaches out, like she has before,  smiling slightly as he hand passes through the images._ _  
_

_“They are talking full Overwatch shutdown. More than just the suspension Blackwatch got. A big player for ‘good’ is going to be gone. Could be an issue, shake up the current dynamic.”_ _  
_

_Haseya clicks her tongue, swirling her finger around the rim of her glass, leaving Sombra’s pictures alone. Her mind is elsewhere, on Jesse travelling out in the world and all the people in the Swiss HQ who had been her brother’s family._ _  
_

_“What’s your pretty lil’ head thinkin’ ‘bout, chica?”_ _  
_

_“Why’s it any of yer business, chismosa?”_ _  
_

_Sombra laughs happily, putting her glass down and turning to face Haseya more fully, “A gossip? Rude. Just figured, ya know, you are finished with the whole Ashe thing - even if you were quite merciful, which I still can’t understand - it’d be time to find Jesse.”_ _  
_

_Haseya picks up her glass and takes a swig. She clears her throat and puts the empty glass down. It had crossed her mind on more than one occasion, especially considering Sombra has been printing out copies of Jesse’s wanted posters and leaving them on her doorstep. He’d last been seen in El Paso and Haseya had thought it was so funny, remembering the album they’d used to listen to. Mary Robbins’ ‘Gunfighter Ballads and Trail Songs’._ _  
_

_“Out in the west texas town of El Paso, I fell in love with a Mexican girl, night time would find me at Rosa’s cantina-”_ _  
_

_“-music would play and Felina would whirl. Mexican girl, huh? Are you flirting with me, Haseya?” Sombra snickers._ _  
_

_“Told ya not to call me that.” Haseya grumbles but there’s no malice behind her words, “Liked that song, thinkin’ ‘bout Jesse bein’ in El Paso.”_ _  
_

_“Ah, so you sing me love songs because of it? Then keep thinking about your brother while you serenade me.” Sombra flutters her lashes and leans in, cackling when Haseya pushes her face away._ _  
_

_Making a few motions in the air, the song begins playing out of somewhere on Sombra’s jacket. She gets up and offers Haseya her hand._ _  
_

_“Dance with me. You know the Bachata?”_ _  
_

_Haseya snorts and doesn’t take her hand as she gets to her feet, “I’m not doin’ that with ya. I’ll merengue but don’t touch me or I’m kickin’ ya out again.”_ _  
_

_“You wound me.” Sombra puts a hand over her heart._ _  
_

_“Ain’t you got someone else to bug?” Haseya murmurs, slowly moving her hips to the music._ _  
_

_“Figured you could use the company more, give my other interests a little relief.”_

_“Lucky me.” But Sombra was right, she could use the company as she struggles with her inner turmoil over whether or not she should find her brother. What if he was a lonely as her?_

 

_\----_

 

_As time ticks on, Overwatch falls, Sombra stops coming around, and Haseya remains on the homestead. With Ashe keeping out of trouble and a low rate of crime in the past few years, Sheriff Daniels had no reason to come around either. It left Haseya with a lot of time to think, to reflect on the choices that she’s made over the course of her life._ _  
_

_When she’d left her foster home almost twenty years ago she had wanted to stop Ashe from hurting anyone else. It had taken her so long to finally confront Ashe, an endless amount of murders in her wake - each notched into her barrel - and she couldn’t even do the one that mattered._ _  
_

_Except she’d accomplished what she set out to do. Ashe was no longer a threat to anyone else besides herself and so Santa Fe could be at peace._ _  
_

_Haseya just couldn’t understand why she wasn’t at peace with her decision. She felt regret, but it takes a long time for her to understand it's not about letting Ashe go. It's about not finding Jesse._

_She wasn't scared, certainly not afraid of her brother, just unsure of how she would fit into the life he had made. Haseya had no one, was completely independent and self-sufficient. While Jesse was never shown in the papers without his old team from Overwatch. He'd clearly made relationships that Haseya had failed to._

_So she brings up Jesse's latest wanted poster on her phone - a gift from Sombra that didn't even have the woman’s number in it - and sees Jesse was last in Tallahassee. It was from a few months ago but it was a good place to start._

_Haseya's thumb is over the ‘confirm flight’ button when an explosion shakes the house like an earthquake. She holds onto the wall before running about the house to see if her DIY fix on the gas stove had blown. It wasn’t that, and if the alerts blowing up her phone were any indication it was a lot bigger than a gas explosion._ _  
_

_[Sombra: Whelp. So much for the train, hermana. Don’t know what woke the sleeping dog but she’s your problem now.]_ _  
_ _[Daniels: The /train/, McCree. Are you kidding? I thought you said Ashe was handled years ago!?]_ _  
_ _[Sante Fe Gorge Train Track Explosion Above The Panorama Diner]_

 _When Haseya sees the destruction in front of the Panorama firsthand it drops her to her knees. She’d eaten at that diner as a child, filled up her father’s pick up truck at the gas station around the corner, looked out over the gorge-_ _  
_ _And now that surrounding area is covered in debris and fire. Knowing the resources the city has they will never get this train fixed._ _  
_

_Haseya turns away from the edge and yells Ashe’s name to the sky._

 

_\----_

 

_And she’d have stopped Ashe too, shot her dead if it hadn’t been for the cowboy beneath her. She’d have recognized the serape anywhere, the burgundy with the sharp orange geometrical patterns... It had been the last one that their mother had woven. McCree had never taken it off and each and every wanted poster Haseya had saved featured the item of clothing._ _  
_

_Like a mantra repeated over and over again she heard his name in her mind. ‘Jesse, Jesse, Jesse, Jesse-’_ _  
_

_It had been easy to dismiss Ashe and turn all her focus on her brother. He was still as kind and as handsome as he had been as a child. Haseya hops down from the ledge and approaches him, sees the realization dawn on his face as tears begin to fall._ _  
_

_She can’t say more than, “Hey, Jess’.”_ _  
_

_Yet her hearts feels complete once more._ _  
  
_

_\----_ ** _  
_****_  
_** Jesse’s chin rested gently on the top of Haseya’s head where the woman was curled against his chest. The woman… she was thirty-four, no longer a child. She had been supporting herself and fighting for justice just like Jesse, as if they'd been cut from the same cloth. Siblings far apart but with the same need for heroics. He ran his hand slowly up and down her back, listening to her quiet whispers against his shoulder. 

“ -then ya’ll showed up. Planned to finally end Ashe but then I saw you, realized I had more important things to worry about. Or, not worry about… just that there’s more important things than gettin’ revenge.” She murmurs, rubbing the wool of McCree’s serape between her fingertips. A repetitive, comforting gesture that eases them both.

Wool, heavy fabrics, they were items that meant comfort and family for the McCree’s. 

“You tellin’ me all that, you know it means the world to me… never expected to be let in like this when I saw you again.” Jesse murmurs, presses his lips against her hair gently, “Never thought I’d see you again, actually. Was livin’ life thinkin’ I ended yers before it even began…” 

“ You gotta know why I never sought ya out. I just-” Haseya lets out a quiet breath, “- got tangled up in life. Would’ve eventually, ‘specially when I heard Overwatch was back up an’ runnin’. Knew you’d be there, an’ ya are. Bein’ a hero…” 

“Can’t believe ya thought I was a hero.” Jesse murmurs, “Ain’t many who think that way.” 

“That sounds like some bullshit.” Haseya huffs, listening as a door downstairs open and closes, “Guess yer fella got sick of waitin’ outside. Probably makin’ sure I haven’t shot ya yet.” 

“He woulda’ heard the shot.” Jesse hums, “Much as I like the guy I’m more inclined to stayin’re with you, Hay-Hay.” He feels her hold onto him more tightly.

“Missed hearin’ that.” She whispers, “Never let no one call me anythin’ but ‘McCree’. Hearin’ my name… might be nice, for a fresh start.” 

“Fresh start, huh?” Jesse asks, “Where you plan on goin’?” Jesse asks

“No idea… don’t got anyone or any other places I know. ” Haseya says. Haseya hasn’t been close to anyone, had relationships, even if a few kind cops, locals, and one hacker had tried to break through her walls. It breaks Jesse’s heart because she deserved _everything,_ and she’s had none of it. 

“Well you got me. Ain’t plannin’ on bein’ far from ya and I figure if I offer, you’ll follow. Come to Spain with us. Overwatch will have a place for ya, ‘specially since I’m thinkin’ Ashe is done for a lil’ bit.” Jesse offers, releasing Haseya so she can pull back and look at him. 

Jesse feels that surge of guilt and pain run through his chest as he looks at her once more. But as she smiles, beginning to nod and the smile spreads wider, those bad feelings disappear. She had tears in her eyes by the time she finally says, “Yes!” and throws her arms around her brother's neck to embrace him.

She didn't need to be saved, didn't need someone to whisk her away to a better life… but she definitely wouldn't turn down the offer.

“... do people know ‘bout me? Your friends?”

Jesse swallows thickly and cradles her closely, “Not as many as you deserve… Hanzo, his brother Genji, my ol' Blackwatch commander but he's-”

“Dead. Gabriel Reyes…”

“Yeah, Gabe… but I don't wanna get all sad on ya!” Jesse pulls back so he can see her, pushes past the nausea and just tries to just be _happy_. “Let's go talk to Han’ ‘bout gettin’ ya back on our evac’ plane. Probably got the bosses worried sick havin’ not called in.”

Haseya nods, leaning in and giving Jesse one more quick embrace and Jesse realizes she's just as reluctant to leave the embrace as he is. Eventually they do separate and head downstairs, if holding hands counts as being separated.

 

\----

 

Jesse stares down at the cigarillo between his finger tips, watching as it burns down and ash drops off by his feet. He looks out into the dark sprawling fields from his seat on the porch and lets out a shaky breath. A hand settles on his shoulder and Jesse reaches back, gripping it tightly.

“... How do ya do it? Everyday, lookin’ at ‘im. My chest _aches_ , sugar, an’ it ain't stoppin’.” 

“Eventually you realize the happiness you feel at seeing them outways the pain. You are so filled with joy by their presence that you feel whole, even with the ache.” Hanzo whispers, sitting down next to him on the step. He pulls their joined hands into his lap and kisses along the metal of Jesse’s knuckles, “I would be lying if I said it was a quick adjustment. It will take time, and there are many moments when that ache will outway the happiness… but not in the long run.” 

Jesse stubs out the smoke and lays his head against Hanzo, curling his body toward his lover, “...didn’ expect this.” 

“It is not something we tell ourselves is possible, even if we have often dreamed of it. The realization that our loved one is alive shifts our entire perspective on life. I assure you it is for the better.” 

Jesse laughs a bit, reaching over with his free hand and curing it around Hanzo’s middle, “ Don’t worry ‘bout that, I sure as hell know this is better. Knowin’ she’s _alive_ , even if she’s been through so much-” Jesse shakes his head a bit, “- makes me more determined to give her a good rest of ’er life.” 

“Ah, I am familiar with that feeling. That urge to protect them and make them happy… just do not become overbearing. Haseya has a … strong personality. I am sure she will tell you her displeasure.” Hanzo grimaces a bit and Jesse peaks up at him. 

“You speakin’ from experience?” 

“Certainly.” Hanzo confirms, twisting so he can hold Jesse in his arms probably, wrapping them around Jesse’s shoulders. 

“Is invitin’ her to the Watchpoint a bad idea?” 

“Would that stop you?” 

“Hell no.” Jesse snickers, “Where Hay-Hay goes, I go. Within reason, a’course. Not far from you an’ Genji, obviously.” 

“They are already displeased with us at the Watchpoint. When I contacted Commander Morrison and Winston I simply told them we would need about a week before we require an airlift. The fact I did not include any reason or justification for my request was not received well but I suppose they will be understanding when they see who we have with us.” Hanzo’s hands run in small circles and Jesse sinks further into the embrace. 

It was strange for Jesse at the moment. He craved the comfort and understanding that Hanzo could give him in this situation but he also felt pulled. Haseya was in the house packing up her most important belongings. Her excitement was palpable and it eased Jesse’s worries a bit that she had no reservations coming with them, but he still wanted to be with her now. 

But Hanzo had said not to be overbearing, let her be her own person despite all the lost time they have to make up for. 

There’s some other things Jesse has to make up for too. 

He pulls back from Hanzo and holds the man’s biceps, waiting until they’ve locked eyes to speak. 

“Hanzo, sugar, I’m _sorry._ I accused you of a lot of awful shit when we first met, thought you wanted to hurt Genji, was jealous of ya gettin’ a second chance-” Jesse’s face falls when he truly remembers how terrible he’d been to Hanzo who had probably been trying to bask in the same elation Jesse is feeling now, “ - now that I get it, now that I’m in your position, I can’t believe I told ya that shit. If I ever had to hurt her again… fuckin’ shoot myself first.” 

“ I am not in need of more apologies from you, Jesse.” Hanzo insists, the kindest smile on his lips. Jesse wants to kiss it. 

“You may not be in need but I got more to give.” Jesse says, sliding his hands up Hanzo’s arms, shoulders, and finally cups his face. He leans in and presses the sweetest of kisses to Hanzo’s lips, mumbling against them, “It was jealousy. I hope I ain’t messed up anythin’ with you an’ Genji.”

“Nothing. Genji and I are wonderful, as you and Haseya will be. I will be there for you every step of this transition.” Hanzo assures and McCree lets out a breath. 

“Don’t deserve that. So damn lucky to have ya, pumpkin.” McCree grins, leaning back against the railing as Hanzo surges forward and kisses him. Hanzo’s hands get on his face, in his hair, and Jesse feels _loved_. He’s had Hanzo for awhile now, built a family in him and Genji. Only now does that family finally feel complete. 

Tears well up in Jesse’s eyes again but he doesn’t let them stop the kiss. He sinks further into the kiss as the moon rises high in the sky and the crickets chirp out in the distance of his old home, while his new home pushes him down against the porch and holds him steady.  
  
\----

 

Haseya’s face has been pressed up against the glass most of the flight, having never been in a plane before. Speeding trains were familiar for the cowboy but planes were an oddity, a luxury not easily afforded. Lena had been very good about not asking, focusing on getting them back to Gibraltar, and Jesse had been grateful for Lena being discreet and just flying the plane. It gave him time to rest with his head on Hanzo’s shoulder, watching Haseya move around the cabin, look out the window, and attempt to make baskets on the hoop in the corner.

“ ...there is much she has not seen except for on television. I wonder how she will react to many of our friends and their abilities.” Hanzo muses.

Chuckling softly, Jesse stroked his thumb over an exposed patch of skin on Hanzo’s belly, “ Should be interestin’ … yer awful fond if her, ain't ya?” Jesse asks, and Hanzo shrugs slightly as not to disturb Jesse's head.

“She reminds me of Genji.” Hanzo says simply and Jesse laughs, giving his side a squeeze. 

“Of course she does. Hell, we awful like projectin’ onto each other’s siblin’s don’t we?” Jesse teased, nuzzling his face further into the crook of Hanzo’s neck. 

“It is the human condition.” Hanzo says simply, “ We cannot help but see our loved ones in others. Thank you for allowing me to have your sister, I suppose.” 

“Hell, least I could do for havin’ Genji for all those years.” Jesse says, “Don’t know what I would’ve done without him. All of us, we’re a family. We got one another now, can support each other. It’s the way it was supposed to be.” 

“Jess’! Hanzo! We’re landin’! Is that the base? Hooooly shit!” Haseya gasps, running over to the two of them. Despite Jesse’s clearly comfortable position she begins tugging at his and Hanzo’s arms to get them to come to the window and see. Despite having been on a landing jet a million times the men follow her over to the window and watch the descent, each standing on either side of her. 

When the jet lands Tracer gives them a little wave and zips out of the carrier and out of the bay with a, “Good luck! Genji is coming!”

Haseya runs out to the carrier doors, eyes wide and amazed, “Oh wow! How’s she do it!?” She asks, not waiting for Hanzo and Jesse before she’s already exiting the jet and running down to greet their visitor, “Hey there!” 

Jesse and Hanzo share an amused look before hurrying after her, out of the carrier and into Genji’s upset wake. Despite Haseya’s greeting and the fact that Genji is going right toward her his focus is on the approaching behind her.

“Why would you not call us with updates!? Why would you not tell us what happened!? You _must_ file mission reports! I have been worried _sick_! ‘We need another week and will not explain why’ _bullshit_!” Genji shouts, rounding on both Jesse and Hanzo, a finger pointed into each of their chests, “This is unacceptable, I will not stand for-” 

Genji’s focus turns to the woman immediately in front of himself - like he hadn’t realized she was there before at all - and Jesse watches the face plate to see if he can read anything that Genji is thinking.

“Gen-” Jesse starts but Genji holds up a finger. 

“No. Cease. Quiet.” Genji says. Slowly Genji reaches up and unhooks his face plate. His eyes are wide and full with tears, an open mouth slowly turning up into a smile. Genji shares a look with Jesse and he _knows_. From the similarities in his and Haseya’s appearance to the descriptions that he’s given Genji- Jesse smiles softly and gives a little nod, a hand on Haseya’s back gently urging her forward. 

“This is Genji, Hanzo’s brother. My best friend in the whole world. Genji, this is -” 

“Hay-Hay-” Genji clears his throat, tears spilling over his cheeks, “ _Haseya,_ oh my god,  _私はそれを信じることができない、これはどうやって起こったの?”_ _  
_

“Well, I’ll be the first to say I don’t rightly know what’cher sayin’ but-” Haseya has wetness in her eyes for a man she’s never met but understands is _family,_ “- I get it. How’d it happen, I dunno… probably so I could be here with you now?” She sniffs and Genji laughs brightly, picking her right up off the ground and twirling her around so much everyone has to take a step back. 

“I’m so happy to meet you!” Genji laughs and the sounds of the two giggling fills the entire bay. When Genji eventually puts her down Haseya immediately picks him up and twirls him around in return.

“Whoa! So strong!” Genji compliments, pleased to be whirled around and laughing as loud as she had, “ I feel like I know you already. Is that weird? I know McCree’s told me things but it’s like I _know_ you.” He murmurs against her shoulder as she finally sets him back down to his feet. 

“Course not. I feel the same.” Haseya breathes, holding him tightly, “S’nice to meet you, Genji.”

Genji pulls back and admires her, stroking a gentle hand along her cheek. Jesse can see what Genji is seeing, the tan skin, the slight freckles, the _smile_ that lights up an entire room. She’s lighting up this whole bay right now by just being here.  
Genji apologizes softly for touching her and steps back, turning to the other cowboy present, “ _Jesse._ ” 

Jesse grins, taking hold of Genji’s hands and giving each pair of knuckles a kiss. “ _I know_. Haseya… fuck, what’s with ya’ll, comin’ back from the dead? Ain’t sure I can take many more.” He chuckles. 

“ _Jesse_.” Genji says again and hugs the cowboy so tightly around his middle Jesse wheezes, “Your _sister_. Life is-” He’s shaking his head against Jesse’s chest, “-wonderful, a gift. I am so _happy.”_ _  
_

Genji lets go once more and Jesse feels like he can breathe again. He watches as Genji turns to Haseya and asks, “... is forgiveness not a wonderful thing?” He’s looking down at Haseya with all the fondness anyone could muster. Well, almost, because it seems Hanzo has the same expression on his face and Jesse knows he likely has as well.

Haseya starts to get fidgety, her cheeks turning red as all three men gaze at her. 

“‘course it’s wonderful. Hate to think Jesse’s held the weight for so long. I hope everyone can forgive themselves... Alright, I ain’t some roadside attraction!” Clearly embarrassed by being the center of attention, “Where we headed, Jess’? I wanna go see yer room, meet yer friends. Let’s go!” Haseya insists, pulling Jesse along by the arm and toward the only door she sees. 

“That’s the bathroom.” Jesse states and Haseya blinks, letting go of his hand. 

“I’m gonna-” She points toward the bathroom, “- use that real quick and then we’ll head on that lil’ adventure. Yeah?” 

Jesse chuckles and waves her off. When she disappears Jesse turns and embraces Genji and Hanzo tightly to his chest. Neither one of them comment when Jesse starts crying and he’s thankful for it, knowing he is safe in their arms.  


\----

 

“So we’ve told everyone to meet up for a real important brunch tomorrow. Oddly enough everyone’s on base so I guess yer gettin’ the full package.” Jesse states, watching as Genji fluffs pillows and Hanzo comes back into the bedroom with an armful of blankets.

“This is all I could find in storage. I also finished speaking with Morrison… while he is displeased we brought an ‘unregistered’ onto base he will wait until after brunch for an interrogation. Then Haseya will need to determine whether or not she plans to stay and become a member of Overwatch. He is not doubtful of your skill.” Hanzo assures, resting the blankets down on the desk for now while Genji finishes with the sheets. 

“ ‘Unregistered’. Hell, I ain’t tryin’ to jump the border, just want wanna see my damn brother.  How many times I gotta tell ya you ain’t gotta do that, Genji!?” Haseya tries to wrestle the pillow out of Genji’s hands but he fights back against her. 

“Haseya, I’m helping!” Genji insists, pulling the pillow back and giving it a very pointed fluff. He lays it back down on the bed and sticks his tongue out at her. 

Haseya smirks and sticks out her tongue back at him, moving over to the pile of blankets and picking them up, “Thanks for bringin’ these, Hanzo. Serape’s are pretty cozy but nothin’ beats a real blanket.” 

“It is my pleasure, Haseya.” Hanzo says softly, not offering to assist her as she begins laying the blankets out across the bed. 

Genji steps back and nods a bit, “Well, I think I’ll give you all time to settle down, get Haseya settled in for the night. Sis’?” 

Haseya perks up immediately and turns to Genji, giving him a big hug around his middle. Genji embraces her back and kisses the top of her head.

“You sleep well, okay? I’m right across the hall if you need me. Don’t hesitate.” Genji insits, giving one last wave and a pat to Jesse and Hanzo’s shoulders before leaving them. 

It’s just about then that Jesse notices the blanket Haseya is laying out on the bed. 

“This is the ugliest damn blanket I ever did fuckin’ see. Cozy as hell tho’, what fuckin’ thrift store ya get this in?” 

“One in my hometown. When I had nothing else… I had this.” Hanzo says softly, watching as Haseya pulls the blanket up to her face and cradles it. 

“Sorry I made fun of it.” Haseya mumbles against the soft fabric. 

“He knows it’s fuckin’ ugly.” Jesse snickers, finishing laying the other blankets down over the bed but letting her keep hold of the ugly one. 

“I… will let you keep it until you are more comfortable.” Hanzo says, “But I am quite fond of it and would like it back if I am able to, once you have your own belongings.” 

“I’ll keep it safe.” Haseya promises, sitting down on the edge of the bed with the blanket cradled in her arms. 

“Alright, so you got your clothes. Bathroom is through there. If you need anythin’ me and Han’ are in the room right next door and Genji’s across the hall.” Jesse says, fidgeting a little and moving toward the door. 

“Wait, Jess’... can I just talk to ya for a bit before ya go?” 

Jesse shares a look with Hanzo who nods simply. Hanzo bows his head slightly toward Haseya, “Have a wonderful evening… sister.” 

Haseya grins and gives him a little wave. When Hanzo leaves Jesse sits next to Haseya on the bed. She immediately lays her head down against his shoulder and Jesse pulls her in against him. 

“Jus’ want to thank ya for bringin’ me ‘ere, vouchin’ for me. Givin’ me a place… I ain’t expected you to be so kind and so-” 

“Stoppin’ ya right there. Yer family, my sister. I’m gonna do anythin’ I can ta make you comfy.” Jesse whispers, kissing the top of her head, “... you excited for tomorrow’s brunch?” 

“Yeah if I can remember where ya said the mess hall is.” Haseya snorts, “This place is a fuckin’ maze-” 

“I’ll walk ya there. You got everythin’ ya need?” 

“... sorta wanna ask you to stay.” She admits, feeling a little foolish for it and Jesse can see it in how she tries to shy away. 

“Ah, kiddo, you can ask me to. Just gimme a sec’ to tell Han’ an’ I’ll-” 

“No, no no.” Haseya takes a deep breath, “I will see you first thing in the mornin’?” 

“First thing.” Jesse promises without hesitation. 

“Then I could probably use a lil’ time by myself to think… but’cher right next door if I need ya?” 

“Room to yer right.” Jesse promises. 

“ I think I can handle that.” Haseya nods a little. Then she latches onto him in a bear hug, squeezing Jesse until he wheezes. 

“Y-You gotta let me breathe, _hermana_.” 

The hold lets up just a bit and she murmurs, “Scared I’ll wake up from all this. Not that I was… it wasn’ like my life was awful, Jess’. Wasn’ like I didn’ have everythin’ I needed there. That was _home_ , fer my whole life even if it had bad memories. S’where I’ve been for so long… but I was lonely, real lonely.” 

“When I left Blackwatch, not long after I heard ‘bout Jack and Gabriel dyin’... never felt lonelier. S’like everythin’ I knew was gone and I wandered ‘round just tryin’ to get by. I got by, but there’s this itch - a _longin’ -_ to be with yer family again. I imagine s’what yer feelin’ now, that’cha want to be with me. I understand it, Hay-Hay. But yer not alone no more.”

“No,  I ain’t. You, Geji, Hanzo… speaking of Hanzo, I guess you better get goin’.” She grins, hopping to her feet and motioning to the door.

Jesse raises an eyebrow and slowly gets up, wandering in that direction with her, “ Second ago ya wanted me to stay and now yer kickin’ me out?”

“Not kickin’ ya out-” Haseya leans against the door frame with a smile, “- I just know ya ain't had a moment by yerself since we met and if yer as overwhelmed as I am… might be good for ya to go have a lil’ quiet time wit'cher man.”

“... yer just the type to think if everyone but yerself, huh?” Jesse asks, a surge of fondness sparking tears back in his eyes.

“Hey now, yer the same way. Cut from the same cloth after all..” Haseya tugs on the corner of his serape affectionately, “ Plus I could use a lil’ time too an’ then I'll see ya in the mornin’.”

“In the mornin’.”Jesse agrees. He can't help but pull her into his chest one last time for the night, just to assure himself she's still real. He lets out a soft breath as she embraces him back and Jesse feels himself settle, enough that he can leave her for the night.

“I love you.” Jesse murmurs into her hair and Haseya grips him tighter for a few moments longer.

“Love you, Jess’.” Haseya whispers.

Eventually Jesse realizes one of them will have to choose to part so he pulls up his chaps and lets it be him. 

Jesse kisses her on the forehead and backs toward the door, “You have a good night, Hay-Hay, I’m right next door. If ya need me don’ be afraid to come get me. Yeah?” 

“Yeah.” Haseya agrees, giving him a little wave as he backs out the door and slowly closes it. 

Jesse has to take a deep breath so he doesn’t panic now that she’s out of view. He reminds himself that he will see her again very soon and makes his way next door. It’s a relief to find Hanzo already in his bed, his prosthetic legs propped up against the wall near the end of the bed. 

Hanzo looks up at him just as the door to the room closes behind Jesse. Jesse kicks his socks, pants, and the rest of his clothing off on his way to the bed. He takes his arm off and lays it on the bedside table before crawling into bed and immediately laying his head on Hanzo’s shoulder. 

“I’ll admit I am surprised to see you.” Hanzo whispers, not hesitating to pull Jesse in against him. 

“Knew you’d be lonely without me.” Jesse murmurs, nuzzling his beard against Hanzo’s bare chest slowly, “Nah, just… needed ya?” 

“What do you need me to do?” Hanzo asks.

“Jus’ keep huggin’ me… an’ if I cry don’t make too much’a deal of it. An’ if I cry _a lot_ maybe pass me some tissues?” 

That gets a little laugh out of Hanzo and he presses a slow kiss to Jesse’s forehead, “If you cry, I will be here for you. If you sob, I will be here for you. And I will most certainly pass you tissues if you are in need of them.” Hanzo says simply, and Jesse doesn’t feel embarrassed to take the tissues from him when they’re offered later that night.

  
  
\----

 

Jesse slowly eases up his bolo tie, making sure the turquoise stone sits snugly between the collar of his burgundy button up. The fitted jeans, shined boots, and _fancy_ hat are more effort than Jesse as ever put into a brunch outfit. Generally he would waddle out of bed and barely look in a mirror before making his way to the kitchen. Today he’s actually combed his hair. 

He can tell that Hanzo is silently judging his preparedness, but from the way his hands have found their way to Jesse’s hips he must not mind the outfit too much.  Jesse chuckles when Hanzo peaks around from behind him in the mirror, gives his hips a small squeeze. 

“You needn’t be so nervous… you are endlessly handsome. It is not as if you have to divulge your past. You simply must introduce, Haseya.” 

“That ain’t makin’ me any less nervous.” Jesse mumbles, turning away from the mirror and winding his arms around Hanzo’s waist. It’s then he can finally see the blue silk shirt Hanzo is wearing, tucked into a pair of dark jeans, “Damn, always loved this shirt. Guess I ain’t the only one lookin’ nice this mornin’.” 

“It is simply to support you.” Hanzo insists, rising up onto his toes to kiss McCree. Jesse leans into it for a moment but doesn’t get lost in the kiss. His mind is still elsewhere- 

“Think we’ve given her long enough time?” Jesse asks and Hanzo laughs, pulling away. 

“Yes. Considering Genji has been with her for the last hour getting ready.” When Jesse says nothing Hanzo laughs and nudges the stunned man toward the door, “I had wanted you to take your time getting ready and not rush over. Come, they have already text me to say they are ready at anytime.”

“Well, I’m gonna just-” Jesse motions toward the door and then turns and darts out, only pausing to grab his serape on the way out the door. He goes next door, Hanzo on his heels, and knocks. 

Haseya opens the door and Jesse’s smile spreads so wide-

 

\----

 

“How many people ya say are gonna be out’ere?” 

“Too many.” 

“More than ten?” 

“Easily.”

“Shit.” Haseya sucks a deep breath, stops them before they go through the swinging mess hall doors. Hanzo and Genji had gone ahead of them, and by the sounds of voices on the other side there was more than enough people, all asking questions as to why Hanzo and McCree had been so secretive about their mission. McCree swears he hears Reinhardt bellowing about how ‘Secrets are what killed Overwatch in the first place! Now you will not tell us! Where is Jesse!?’. 

Haseya looks a little concerned, holding onto one of the frayed edges of Jesse’s serape. 

“Friendliest guy in there.” Jesse assures, waiting for her to be ready to enter. 

Jesse watches as Haseya, his little sister and now a _woman_ , takes a deep breath. She adjusts the soft, brown suede dress she’s wearing, and where it flows down to her feet and he can see the cowboy boots shuffling nervously on them. Looking back up he follows the braid that’s laying down her spine, gets distracted by the turquoise stones around her neck and in her ears- then he looks at her. Really looks at her and sees _Haseya_. 

He doesn’t know her, not really, but Jesse is determined to spend his life making up for what has been done and grow their relationship. How he’d hurt her _and_ hurt himself, and the repercussions it has had, weigh heavily on Jesse but as he looks at her… he’s ready to move forward. 

The nerves seem to leave Haseya’s face and she stands a bit straighter, adjusts her hat a touch and she puts on a face that Jesse knows well. It’s confident, with striking eyes and a wide smile and a _speck_ of nerves if you knew how to look past the McCree mask. Confident, friendly, and just anxious for people to like you so you overcompensate on the southern charm a bit, and sure it’s a bit goofy but you’re happy. You make lifelong friends and partnerships when you walk into a room like that.

Jesse had put on that charm and weaseled his way into Blackwatch, gotten himself a _family,_ and he knows Haseya’s beauty and charm will have the same effect. 

Jesse takes Haseya’s hand and waits for her to give him the go ahead. When she nods he walks into the room first, but with Haseya barely an inch behind him at his side. 

“I have already explained, if you would be so patient, that you were all called to brunch so we could expla-”  

Jesse doesn’t know what he’d do without Hanzo. When Jesse sees him it removes any fear that he has about entering the room. Clutching Haseya’s hand, and with all eye on them, Jesse brings her forward. 

Jesse takes a deep breath, lets Haseya step forward, “ Everyone… I know ya’ll were real worried ‘bout me an’ Hanzo on our mission. But it wasn’t a bad reason for us stayin’... it was the best possible reason. We met someone I thought I’d lost. This is my lil’ sister, Haseya. I haven’t seen her since I was fourteen, all the way back before I was in Blackwatch.”

Ana is the first to stand, rising up from the end of the table and setting her teacup down. She rounds the table and walks past everyone else with their confused and shocked faces. She stops in front of Haseya, who is about a head taller, and reaches up to cup Haseya’s face with her hands. 

“... I never thought I would have a chance to meet you, Haseya. I am glad to see you here.”

There was a handful of people in the world that Jesse had trusted with his secret. Despite having looked to Ana as a second mother it was something he had never spoken of to her. However there was recognition in her voice and t made sense that Gabriel would have gone to his friends as confidants. It also explained why Jack had let Haseya McCree on base with barely any fuss, with only the promise of paperwork to do later. 

Jesse huffs and rubs at his eyes a little, “ Fuckin’ Gabe could never keep his mouths shut.” 

“It was with your best interest in mind, Jesse.” Ana insists, thumb brushing over Haseya’s cheeks, “Lines, wrinkles… you are not drinking enough water. Dehydrated. You lived in a _desert_. That should have been a priority.” 

Haseya looks thoroughly unsure of what to do, not knowing how to deal with this sort of care from a stranger. “I-It’s nice to meet ya, ma’am.” She stammers, letting her face be moved around. 

“When was the last time you were to a doctor?” 

“Real one? I ain’t got the kinda money for tha-” 

Ana tsks and strokes a hand down over the hair in front of Haseya’s face, “I am Ana Amari. Your brother is a son to me. I have known him since he first came to Blackwatch and I intend to treat you the same as him.” 

“With love and no bullshit.” Fareeha explains, elbowing Jesse in the ribs, “Why wouldn’t you tell me, huh?” 

“It’s sorta complicat-” Jesse tries to explain but Haseya interrupts. 

“Sometimes people are separated and that’s just sorta life… I owe ya’ll for lookin’ after him. I’m glad he could have a sister even if I weren’t there.” She insists, unknowingly striking a nerve with the Amari’s who understand separation all too well. It’s a good enough answer for them both. 

“A sister of Jesse’s is a sister to me. Fareeha, s’nice to meet you, Haseya.” 

Haseya reaches out to shake hands but Fareeha picks her up right off the ground in a giant hug. 

“Oh! We’re huggers! I’m a hugger too!” Haseya grins, clearly pleased by the affection they’ve all chosen to show her. 

The Amari’s break the dam and open up Haseya and Jesse to a whole line of questioning. However it doesn’t take long for everyone to push Jesse to the wayside and simply focus on her. 

“You look so _alike._ ” Hana breathes.

“Two McCree’s. We aren’t ready for that.” Torbjorn groans. 

“Do you like pancakes? A fresh plate for Jesse’s sister!” Reinhardt bellows. 

“What sorta music did you listen to? Please tell me your taste is better than your brothers-” Lucio clearly isn’t happy with the response when Haseya says she too listens to Marty Robbins on repeat. 

But it isn’t just the Overwatch team who has questions. For each given to her, Haseya comes back with a series of her own. 

“What’d’ya mean you got a suit that flies, Fareeha?” 

“Reinhardt, you’re so tall! Never felt so fuckin’ short in my life. Everyone picked me up, you’re so tall you gotta do it now!” 

“... I’m gonna meet a real gorilla who _talks_? Quit pullin’ my leg!” 

“... wait. Hold up. The Commander Morrison I gotta meet is _actually_ Jack Morrison? He’s not dead? Oh my _god_. _I had his poster on my wall… probably shoulda’ put that together._ ” Haseya whispers, her cheeks going a touch pink and Jesse doesn’t want to read too much into that. _  
_

“Wait, _real_ dragons? Genji! Hanzo! The fuck they mean!?” 

“I will let Genji take the lead on this question.” Hanzo insists, pulling Jesse back from the group as Genji begins to explain. 

“You see, long ago there were two great dragon lords, the ancestors of my family. After a few less than fortunate incidents the two brothers decided to live as humans, and they passed down their mighty prowess to the Shimada in the form of our spiritual guardian dragons. However they are not all strength and destruction, they have a soft si-”

Hanzo shuts the mess hall door behind them, giving the two some privacy separate from the group inside.

“Think she’ll be okay? I’m worried they’re overwhelmin’er. I know she’s in with Genji but- Heh, I’m bein’ too worried, huh? Ana knew. Hell, Jack probably knew. They love her. Think they love her more than me.” 

“That is impossible for me, even if I am quite fond of her.” Hanzo insists, “Was this nearly as a scary as you anticipated?” 

“Nah, didn’ expect it to really be bad but ya always worry… Han’, I know I’ve apologized and thanked ya more than once, twice, or three times but you _know_ I mean it. Forforgivin’ my behaviour, for supportin’ me in this, introducin’ her with me today and bein’ my rock. I ain’t deservin-” 

“Jesse. One day you will believe yourself to be _worthy_ of all good things happening. You have given me the opportunity to do the same for myself, and while it is a long journey I am sure you will make it to the end and be happy.” 

Jesse’s arms wind around Hanzo’s neck and he lays his cheek down against the side of Hanzo’s head. “ _Thank you_.” 

Jesse knows it will not be an easy journey, as each time he looks at Haseya’s face he feels _guilt._ But as he looks through the window he sees her smiling and laughing with her arm around Genji’s waist it lets Jesse know that everything will be alright, even if it takes time.

Hanzo’s hands slide up his back and embrace him, holding him close and comforting. Jesse breathes in the scent of Hanzo’s hair, feels the silk beneath his fingers and knows he has everything he could ever need. 

“I love ya with all my heart, Darlin’.” Jesse whispers, keeping the words quiet just for him to hear. 

Hanzo’s lips press to the curve of Jesse’s neck and he murmurs against the skin, “ I love you, Jesse.”

First after losing his parents and Haseya and secondly after losing Gabriel and Blackwatch, Jesse never thought he would have a family again.

Now Jesse has a partner in Hanzo who will never leave him, who will support him through his hardships and Jesse will do the same in return. Jesse knows he still has Genji, a brother who has been a constant in his life from his darkest days who still manages to brighten up even his worst moments. There are so many other members of Overwatch who offer Jesse support and he hopes that they feel he’s just as important and supportive to them as they are to him. 

Then there’s Haseya - he can’t help but peak an eye open and glance back in through the window again - who is now flexing her arm and comparing it to Fareeha, Brigitte and Zarya’s own. Jesse isn’t sure who’s winning but she looks so _happy_.  
Jesse is happy. 

No matter what setbacks may happen to them, or future hardships they must face, Jesse knows he will be happy. And when he starts pressing kisses to Hanzo’s cheeks and listens to Hanzo laugh he knows they’ll _all_ be happy. 

Jesse presses Hanzo back into the wall, kisses him firmly and full on the lips, and laughs so loud as he hears the doors swing open behind them. 

“Jesse! Hanzo! Hey- Oh, wow. Walkin’ in on ya’ll already. Gettin’ close real quick. Kinda dig it. I want ya’ll to eat with me, come on!” Haseya insists, breaking their embrace to pull the men back toward the mess hall.

Each man puts an arm around her and they share a look behind her back. Filled with love, hope, and warmth. Jesse is grateful for Hanzo. If it hadn’t been for him he would have _never_ had the strength to go back and find Haseya again. His family is complete and Jesse is overwhelmed by that feeling. 

He stops their progress and pulls the two in an embrace just to hold them for a bit longer before they return to the group. A few moments later Jesse feels Genji, familiar at his back, and he knows they will all be okay. Jesse, Hanzo, Haseya, Genji, the rest of Overwatch… They will move on, grow, and rise up together.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you again everyone!  
> I have a plan to make small oneshots from Haseya's perspective with her interacting with other characters! Let me know what you think and who you'd like her to meet!  
> I'm also on twitter [@KCeeRae](https://twitter.com/KCeeRae)


End file.
